How do you describe rotten feta?

Foetid

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DiamondChocobos
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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These puns are special type of cheesy, Feta cheesy, that's why they are Greece-y.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iamexceptional
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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Feta Cheese

Wife: I got this feta cheese from the new Mediterranean market in town. It's so good!

Me: there was a famine in Lebanon a few years ago where they used that cheese to end the crisis.

Wife: ...

Me: it feta lotta people.

Wife: I hate you

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoshWithaQ
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2018
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Can you do feta? Brie my guest.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Glutnix
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2014
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What do you call a lonely and cheesy joke

A gouda one

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bioticman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
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Shout out to whoever first came up with the idea to shred cheese.

It was a grate idea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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Sweet dreams are made of cheese.

Who am I to diss a brie?

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
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The Greeks make the best cheese

You feta believe it!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/charons-voyage
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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I gave my wife some ground chickpeas and she choked to death.

The cops are treating it as a hummus-cide.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shopcounterwill
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2020
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I got sprayed with cheese powder.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rayneeileen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
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Greek food

Did you know that, traditionally, when you serve people Greek food, you're not supposed to warn them about it?

You need to present them with a feta-compli.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arshwana
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese factory?

There was de brie was everywhere.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/agent_kay_6224
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2019
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Dad joke of all dad jokes (found on Tumblr)

I've been making dad jokes for years but my wife and I are expecting our first child and I've finally been making dad jokes while actually being a dad.

When we were in the hospital I got my wife a blanket. What was awesome was they were kept in this machine that was specifially made to heat blankets. I laid the blanket over my wife and siad. "do you think they keep these at womb temperature?" I heard a nurse laugh for a solid 3 minutes.

This is my legacy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Isai76
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2015
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Who enforces cheese standards in Mexico?

The Feta-ralies.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Avian80
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
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What do drugs have in common with cheese jokes?

I don't know, I just like meth and feta memes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GardenerInAWar
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2018
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What type of chips do Feet favor?

Dori-Toes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GivingGarden
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2019
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I can't stand Greek salads.

I like un-feta'd access to my greens.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bopaqod
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
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My wife asked if she picked the best cheese.

I told her that’s gouda, but you can do feta.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fundertaker
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2018
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Why was the cheese angry?

It was just plain Feta-up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/earth_humanoid
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
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Why did the greek salad get angry?

It got feta up over olive the other salads picking on it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
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My friend told me a cheesy joke.

It was okay, but I've heard feta.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ClebberBoi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
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Eating Greek cheese kind of turns me on.

I must have a feta-ish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ALinchpin
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2017
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I once drew a Venn Diagram to explain my use of puns to my wife

We had been cooking dinner, and my wife commented (after one too many comments about 'Gouda being gooda and Feta being Betta') that it seemed like most of my puns tend to be food puns.

So I drew her a diagram. I started with a huge circle to represent all of my puns. Inside that I drew a large circle filling about 90% of it.

"Those are my food puns."

I then drew another circle, this one about half the size of the food circle, with almost all of it inside the food circle.

"And these are my cheese puns."

My wife immediately called me out, pointing at the sliver that was outside of the food circle.

"Shouldn't this be fully inside the other circle?"

"No," I say, "Those puns are rare, but they tend to be cheesiest."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xahhfink6
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2018
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Wanted to make an extra cheesy Valentine for my SO who hates commercial holidays but loves puns.

"I camembert if I’ve told you today, but just in queso I haven’t, you're looking sharp! I havarti accepted you stilton love β€œcheesy” holidays, but ricotta think things can only get feta with a little roman(ce)o. It colby just me, but I swiss you very much when we’re apart. It’s cheddar when we’re together because then I don’t feel provolone. I think we go gouda together, and I want to grow mold with you. Wheel you brie my valentine?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/acertaingestault
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2016
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What do you call a cheesy EDM producer?

David Feta

Credits : My date

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mskas
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2018
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My wife makes Greek salad everyday

I told her I'm feta-up with it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CleverChoice
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2018
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Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses.

That way I could have math and feta cheese.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/even_more_maroon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2019
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What did the cheese say after he made a jump shot?

Swiss!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bmiller62
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2017
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What do you call Greek pasta?

Feta-cini.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sterlings97
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2018
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Wrote and sent this to a girl on OkCupid who said she liked cheesy puns. No response.

So you like cheesy puns, eh? Well you've Comte the right place. I can Feta bunch of Gouda puns into one Muenster-sized sentence. None of the other tools in the Cheddar quite as sharp as I am, at least when it comes to cheese puns. Whoever will lend an o-Paneer will be in Whey over their heads. So look out Baylough, I'm dropping a Bandal of comedy gold that will make your Bra and Pantysgawn.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/malagrond
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2018
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I'd love to eat more cheese

but I don't want to get feta.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LoveFoolosophy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2015
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I heard a cheese pun once so gouda...

...it completely Haloumi away!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Glutnix
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2014
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I made a Venn Diagram to explain my pun usage...

So storytime... My wife and I were talking about my overuse of puns, and food/cheese puns in particularly (that's goud-a but this one's feta, etc.) I ended up drawing a Venn diagram.

The largest circle was my total puns, inside it was a second circle representing food puns, with a third showing cheese puns. I was trying to show that a majority of all of my puns are food related, and many of those are cheese related.

Something like this: http://i.imgur.com/nPdi07H.jpg

My wife immediately told me I did it wrong, that some of the cheese circle was outside of the food puns.

I told her that those are rare, but are often the cheesiest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xahhfink6
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2017
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People keep saying goat cheese is the best, but...

I think a lot of cheeses are feta than goat, you'd agree as you as you Edam. You don't know what you're SWISSing out on. It'd Brie a shame if you never tried them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theycallmeDamon
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2018
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So my family went to a diner...

My mom decided to get a gyro, and in the process of eating it, some of the cheese fell on the table. Dad said we shouldn't worry about it. "Why not?" "Because it isn't real."

At this point we still had no idea what was coming. "Why isn't it real, dad?"

"It's Counter-feta."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Major_Tom42
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2013
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What did one cheese say to the other cheese?

You may be Gouda but I'm Feta!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/teammcdonald
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2016
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