I don't think it's any faster
πŸ‘︎ 58
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ToastyZ71
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2021
🚨︎ report
What works faster than a calculator?

A calcu-now.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yellowlemonie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Which is faster, hot or cold?

Hot, because you can catch a cold.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gunny_McShoot
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
A pregnant mare can run faster than a horse

Because it has 2 horse power

πŸ‘︎ 44
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/c0bu_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
🚨︎ report
I took the shell off my racing snail thinking it would make him faster.

It didn't work, now he is more sluggish....

πŸ‘︎ 83
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/noodlesvonsoup
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
🚨︎ report
They could've cleared that ship from the Suez Canal much faster, if they just would've filled the waterway with detergent

A rising Tide lifts all boats

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/XxSaint_JimmyxX
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
🚨︎ report
The barman says, β€œSorry, we don’t serve faster-than-light particles in here.”

A faster-than-light particle walks into a bar.

πŸ‘︎ 270
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/snrckrd
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that ancient Greeks would shave their heads before the Olympics to run faster?

Modern historians call it balderdash.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dothemagic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
🚨︎ report
Why is a pregnant horse faster than a regular horse?

Because the pregnant one has two horsepower.

πŸ‘︎ 98
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/all_joking_aside
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
A shark can swim faster than me, but I reckon I can run faster than a shark.

So, if it was a Triathlon, it would come down to, which one of us was better at riding a bike....Right!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I told my dad I could run faster than his car he replied how? I said

A car cant run it drives

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hissingsounds
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know The Flash can run faster than lightning?

This is mainly because lightning can't run

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I learned pregnant horses are faster than other female horses

They have double the horsepower

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/stoutlikethebeer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/StoppingMusic21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
You'd think snails would be faster without their shells.

But they're actually a bit more sluggish.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I took the shell off of my racing snail in hopes that he'd be lighter and faster...

But now he's just sluggish

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yadnivek
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
A person that works faster than expected always has extra time on their hands.

The same is true for clocks.

(PSA: Remember to correct yours tonight, as applicable.)

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mrBELDING69
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are French snails faster than American ones?

L’ess cargo.

πŸ‘︎ 68
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can't my bicycle go faster than light?

Because it is two-tired

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/code_punk_
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What makes cars look faster?
πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RhyThMiiic
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a walking stick that makes you walk faster?

A hurricane.

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Marry her faster
πŸ‘︎ 15k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RobMash11
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2018
🚨︎ report
I need to cook faster.

I’m running out of thyme

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Yurastupidbitch
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does an ovum-dealing hymentoptera make things faster?

Because it's an egg-seller ant

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/_ze_
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2020
🚨︎ report
My church can move faster than light

It has no mass

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/im_a_homan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do injured cats get to the vet faster than injured dogs?

Cat litter's more common.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you make an hourglass you faster?

You fill it with quicksand.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Chaisz3r0
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What works faster than a calculator?

A calcu-now.

πŸ‘︎ 102
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mewmewgoo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2021
🚨︎ report
Which one runs faster? Hot or Cold?

Hot, because anyone can catch a cold.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MaxiCato62
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What works faster than a calculator?

A calcu-now

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LastLeave8770
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2021
🚨︎ report
I took the shell off of my racing snail, thinking it would make him faster.

But if anything, it made him more sluggish.

πŸ‘︎ 391
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Which is faster, hot or cold?

Hot, because you can catch a cold.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
🚨︎ report
What works faster than a calculator?

A calcunow

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/medfunguy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
🚨︎ report
What works faster than a calculator?

A calcu-sooner!

πŸ‘︎ 100
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FacePaulMute
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s fasterβ€”hot or cold?

Hot is, because you can catch a cold.

πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/decentname99
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
What works faster than a calculator?

A calcu-now

πŸ‘︎ 89
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kikosmo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s Faster Than a Calculator

A Calcu-Now

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/djendb
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Which is faster hot or cold ?

Hot !! As you can catch cold !

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gp_11
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Which is faster, hot or cold?

Hot, because you can catch a cold

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MangoAway17
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Which is faster, hot or cold?

Hot, because you can catch a cold

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What is faster, something hot or cold?

Of course it’s the hot one, you can always catch a cold

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mxrxx_ag
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I took the shell off of my racing snail, thinking it would make him go faster. If anything it made him more sluggish.
πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Trispir
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s faster, cold or hot?

Hot, because you can catch a cold.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What is faster, Hot or Cold ?

Hot, you can catch a cold

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s faster, cold or hot?

Hot, because you can catch a cold.

πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DrakeVader
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Light travels faster than sound.

This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

πŸ‘︎ 354
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him faster. Unfortunately, it just seems to have made him sluggish.
πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hughdman
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2018
🚨︎ report
Light travels faster than sound.

That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LopsidedVader
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
🚨︎ report

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