I couldn't stop blinking my eyes

so my optometrist put me on stareoids.

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👤︎ u/wmyspr
📅︎ Mar 28 2019
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I was winning in a staring contest once...

and it was all taken away in the blink of an eye.

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👤︎ u/richy923
📅︎ Apr 19 2020
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Got my wife

We have a new baby. It was bed time, and he woke up, and she was a little upset about it, he was tired and crabby.

I rubbed his head and kissed him thrice between the eyes, forcing a blink reflex, from which his eyes didn't open.

"I am the baby kiss-perer!"

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👤︎ u/omrsafetyo
📅︎ Dec 08 2014
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