An American wants to enter a nightclub

Together with some friends from abroad, an Afghan, an Albanian, and Algerian, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguan, an Argintine, an Armenian, and Austrailian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Taiwanese, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turkish, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian

... keep reading on reddit โžก

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/leemhuis
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 12 2021
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Why did the policeman think it was ok to enter a residence when he thought he heard bird calls inside?

Probable caws.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 47
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/douchbagger
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 29 2021
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A boy who enters a fandom is called a fanboy. A girl who enters the fandom is called a fangirl. What is a non binary person called then?

A fanby

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Lanky-Ad1212
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A man enters a bar....

A man dressed in rubber boots, orange overalls, yellow hard hat with a light on, blacked up face and a canary on his shoulder walks into a pub. The whole pub goes silent and everyone stares at him for a few seconds then carries on what they were doing. It was only a miner distraction.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/bob9109
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
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Pun enters a room, kills 10 people....

Pun in, 10 dead.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 18
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
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Why wonโ€™t Trump be able enter the White House on January 21st?

Itโ€™s forbiden

๐Ÿ‘︎ 42
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/LightningStrikes23
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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When the elevator doors opened for me to enter, everyone was asleep inside...

Must be that Ambien music that they play

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
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How do Eskimos enter an Igloo?

They get inuit

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/maccer20
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How do you enter the Publisher's Clearinghouse?

You knock on the door

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/byorderofthe
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why don't they ever charge Santa for break and enter?

They can never find probable Clause

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/NateTheSimpleOne
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A man enters a cheese shop

"Welcome to the towns greatest cheese shop. We have all that you might want. So, what will it be?" asks the clerk.

"Nacho cheese" responds the man

Suddenly angry, the clerk shouts at the man: "Then why the fuck are you here!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SirAchesis
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Enter new password: '123456'

Password must contain a letter: '123456๐’Ÿ๐‘’๐’ถ๐“‡ ๐’ฎ๐‘œ๐“ƒ, ๐ผ๐“‰ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“ˆ ๐’ท๐‘’๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐“‚๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐“Ž ๐“Ž๐‘’๐’ถ๐“‡๐“ˆ ๐“ƒ๐‘œ๐“Œ ๐“ˆ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐’ธ๐‘’ ๐ผ'๐“‹๐‘’ ๐’ป๐‘’๐“๐“‰ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐’ฟ๐‘œ๐“Ž ๐‘œ๐’ป ๐“…๐“๐’ถ๐“Ž๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐’ถ ๐“ˆ๐’พ๐“‚๐“…๐“๐‘’ ๐‘”๐’ถ๐“‚๐‘’ ๐‘œ๐’ป ๐’ธ๐’ถ๐“‰๐’ธ๐’ฝ ๐“Œ๐’พ๐“‰๐’ฝ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š. ๐ป๐‘œ๐“Œ ๐ผ ๐“๐‘œ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐’ป๐‘œ๐“‡ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘œ๐“ˆ๐‘’ ๐“ˆ๐’พ๐“‚๐“…๐“๐‘’๐“‡ ๐“‰๐’พ๐“‚๐‘’๐“ˆ, ๐“Œ๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š ๐“Œ๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“‡๐‘’ ๐“ˆ๐“‰๐’พ๐“๐“ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐“ƒ๐‘œ๐’ธ๐‘’๐“ƒ๐“‰! ๐’ด๐‘’๐“‰ ๐“ƒ๐‘œ๐“Œ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“‡๐‘’ ๐’ถ๐“‡๐‘’ ๐’น๐’พ๐’ป๐’ป๐‘’๐“‡๐‘’๐“ƒ๐“‰ ๐“Œ๐’ถ๐“Ž๐“ˆ ๐’พ๐“ƒ ๐“Œ๐’ฝ๐’พ๐’ธ๐’ฝ ๐“Œ๐‘’ ๐’ธ๐’ถ๐“ƒ ๐‘’๐“ƒ๐’ฟ๐‘œ๐“Ž ๐‘’๐’ถ๐’ธ๐’ฝ ๐‘œ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“‡๐“ˆ ๐’ธ๐‘œ๐“‚๐“…๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐“Ž, ๐’ถ ๐’ธ๐‘œ๐“๐’น ๐’ท๐“‡๐‘’๐“Œ ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น ๐“๐‘œ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐’ธ๐‘œ๐“ƒ๐“‹๐‘’๐“‡๐“ˆ๐’ถ๐“‰๐’พ๐‘œ๐“ƒ๐“ˆ ๐‘œ๐“ƒ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“‹๐‘’๐“‡๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น๐’ถ, ๐‘œ๐“‡ ๐“ˆ๐’พ๐“‚๐“…๐“๐“Ž ๐‘’๐“ƒ๐’ฟ๐‘œ๐“Ž๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“†๐“Š๐’พ๐‘’๐“‰ ๐“…๐‘’๐’ถ๐’ธ๐‘’๐’ป๐“Š๐“๐“ƒ๐‘’๐“ˆ๐“ˆ ๐‘œ๐’ป ๐“ƒ๐’ถ๐“‰๐“Š๐“‡๐‘’ ๐‘œ๐“ƒ ๐’ถ ๐’ป๐’พ๐“ˆ๐’ฝ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“‰๐“‡๐’พ๐“…. ๐’ซ๐“๐‘’๐’ถ๐“ˆ๐‘’ ๐“‹๐’พ๐“ˆ๐’พ๐“‰ ๐’ป๐‘œ๐“‡ ๐’ฏ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐“€๐“ˆ๐‘”๐’พ๐“‹๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘”, ๐’พ๐“‰ ๐“Œ๐‘œ๐“Š๐“๐’น ๐“‚๐‘’๐’ถ๐“ƒ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“Œ๐‘œ๐“‡๐“๐’น ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐“‚๐‘’. ๐ฟ๐‘œ๐“‹๐‘’, ๐’Ÿ๐’ถ๐’น'

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/viky_boy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why can't you enter Sauron's lair?

Because there's always one Mordor.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 23
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Rav4xle
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A horse enters a bar and orders a drink.

When heโ€™s finished, the barkeep asks if he wants another. The horse replies, โ€œI donโ€™t think I do...โ€ and vanished from existence.

To get the joke, you need to know Rene Descartesโ€™ theory โ€œI think, therefore I am.โ€ But if I explained that before the joke, I would be putting Descartes before de horse.

<Staring into the crowd like Fozzie Bear>

... Iโ€™ll show myself out.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/techsavior
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My friend and I where discussing how certain names will never enter certain cultures. He asked if there was ever a Korean Juan? I said no, but...

Thereโ€™s a Taiwan.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Kinjesus
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the lost disciple enter a male strip club?

It was looking for guy-dance.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/extraposer
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I once knew a guy that liked to bask in the sun. He touched my circle of friends but did not enter it...

He was a real tan gent.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What's the room that nobody can enter?

A mushroom

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/emu404
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Whatโ€™s a city you canโ€™t enter?

Ethnicity

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheSketchiest
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
It is hard not to enter this pun.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 2k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 29 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Every time I enter a room, I write down my name on a piece of paper and stick it behind some furniture.

Thatโ€™s my signature move.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I've got a pedigree toothless Norwegian Blue Parrot I want to enter in competitions

I hope it sucks seeds

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Hamsternoir
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
ENTER A NEW PASSWORD โ€œchickenโ€ THE PASSWORD REQUIRES A CAPITAL!!!

โ€œchickenkievโ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 25
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JackTMJones
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
>'Enter new password' = 'chicken' > 'Password must contain a capital'

= 'chickenkiev'

๐Ÿ‘︎ 75
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cotswoldboy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
You may be American when you enter the washroom and you may be American when you leave the washroom but..

When youโ€™re in there European

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/fredvanvleetsr
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I once saw an add to enter the falt earth society

It said they were gathering people from all around the globe

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Sergio_the_pro
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Frankenstein enters a body building competition and finds he has seriously misunderstood the objective
๐Ÿ‘︎ 15
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/leianarodriguez
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My uncle invested in a company that made the Enter-key for computer keyboards...

He made a fortune in Returns...

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 04 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A man enters into a baking competition

And realizes that his cake batter was not turning out right. After a moment of panic, he had a sudden realization and placed the whole mixing bowl, whisk and all, into the oven. After 20 minutes he took the whole thing out and served it to the judges. Understandably, he got last place. When he met up with his family afterwards, his wife asked, โ€œwhat were you thinking?โ€ The man replied, โ€œI donโ€™t know, but it was a whisk I was willing to bake.โ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/EdibleBatteries
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 31 2020
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A guy named Bart enters a bar. As soon as he enters, he is immediately shot and killed. Who killed Bart?

Bartender

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DrakeVader
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What does the German baker say to his customers when they enter his shop?

Gluten log?

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Brandon__DG
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 16 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
You can't enter the day

Access the night.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ashnakag
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
So, a rope enters a bar...

Goes with the bartender and says

>"Give me your best beer!"

but the bartender replies

>"Sorry, but we give no service to ropes, please leave this place"

so the rope leaves, and decides to knot itself to be a totally different being.

So the rope goes back with the bartender, and the bartender says

>"Aren't you the rope i just kicked out of here?"

and the rope says:

>"I'm a frayed knott"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Squidboy2002
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why didn't the border guard allow a llama to enter the country?

hisllamaphobia

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Dogbirddog
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 17 2016
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If you're American when you enter the toilet, and American when you exit the toilet, what are you while you're inside the toilet?

European

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/kachary
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 27 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Pun enters a room...

...and kills ten people.

Pun in, ten dead.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 69
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/AnInsecureMind
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why can't Trump enter the White House?

Because its forbidden

๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Upsurge11
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A pun enters the room, ten people get killed.

The headline?

PUN IN: TEN DIED

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/td941
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Pun enters a room, kills 10 people.

Pun in, ten dead.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 458
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Pun enters the room and kills 10 people.

Pun in. Ten dead.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 125
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/sharmaamit92
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 16 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Pun enters a room and kills 10 people.

Pun in, ten dead!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Raven_007
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Pun enters a room, kills 10 people

Pun in, 10 Dead.

My case is closed.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 22
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Steven_s532
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Pun enters a room, kills 10 people.

Pun in, ten dead.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 37
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Dallas515
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 24 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
so youre american when you enter and exit a bathroom, so what are you while youre in the bathroom?

European

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/easiermarais
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Before you enter the bathroom your American. And when you leave the bathroom your still American. What are you when you are in the bathroom?

European.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/a-random-bro
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Pun enters room, kills 10 people. Pun in, ten dead. GET IT, PUN IN TEN DEAD
๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/sasquatchover
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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