Dog puns about going to school.
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ruler_Grundy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 06 2019
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I'm not very clever, looking for some help with dog puns

So I have this app that is centered around dogs. I'm introducing a level system with 7 levels and need clever dog pun names for each level. I have a list here of the gist of what the levels should mean, but they are too boring as of now. Would love to see your pun skills at work!

  • 1: Amateur
  • 2: Junior Varsity
  • 3: Varsity
  • 4: Park Captain
  • 5: Professional Player
  • 6: Park All-star
  • 7: Olympian Dog

Thanks! :)

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sherlocked_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 19 2016
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Hot Dog Puns

a friend's text to me: I have eaten three mini hot dogs

my response: Frankly, that sounds delicious

I declare you the weiner of the food contest

I hope you dance your buns off

I relish the opportunity to ketchup at a later date


I feel like I could have done more - any other good ones out there?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/wowmomlol
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 03 2015
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My wife asked me if I'd seen the dog bowl

...I said I didn't even know he could play cricket.

Edit: Americans; replace 'cricket' with '10 Pin Bowling 🎳 '

Thank you for the awards

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 17 2020
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A buddy of mine named his dog β€œ5 Miles” so he could tell people he walked 5 miles

But today he ran over 5 Miles

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GigaMike123
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2020
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I apopted a dog from a blacksmith today

As soon as I got it home it made a bolt for the door

πŸ‘οΈŽ 895
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/acideath
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 17 2020
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Every day I come home and ask my dog how his day was, and every day he always gives the same answer...

Ruff.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 435
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MyLatestInvention
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 26 2020
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I’ve never understood why baby dogs are called puppies...

When they could be called subwoofers

πŸ‘οΈŽ 83
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/UncleTevis
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 07 2021
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Couldn't understand why my dog was totally motionless....

Then I realised, it was on paws.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 74
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
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My vet picked up my dog, looked at him and confirmed that he was cross-eyed and that he had to be put down.

Confused and upset, I asked why.

The vet advised he was too heavy to hold any longer.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 109
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 07 2021
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Dogs can't operate MRI machines,

But cats-can.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 125
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Xenonthewizlard
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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What's worse than raining cats and dogs ?

Hailing taxis.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 214
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2020
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What do you call a dog that can do magic?

A labracadabrador!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 67
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ifruitninja
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
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What did one dog say to the other dog?

Bork Bork Bork

Itd be funnier if you were a dog, trust me

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mt105
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 13 2021
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What's the furriest side of a dog?

The outside

πŸ‘οΈŽ 87
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AusSpyder
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 08 2021
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I caught my dog chewing on my boots.

I guess he has really good taste in footwear.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 181
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/IrateScientist
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 07 2020
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If all dogs go to heaven, where do cats go after they die?

Purrrgatory

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Xerxes2004
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 31 2020
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My dog moon got his leg amputated, but that's ok...

He's a got a faux pas now

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2021
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My wife rang me at the pub and said, β€œIf you’re not home in 10 minutes, I’m giving the dinner I cooked you to the dog.” I was home in 5 minutes.

I’d hate for anything to happen to the dog.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 06 2020
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My dog has learned out to use the TV remote...

All she does is paws and unpaws.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NBE01
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 02 2021
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Why do dogs float in water?

Because they're good buoys.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 47
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheRetro_Misfit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 02 2021
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What did Lady Macbeth name her dog?

Spot

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ALittleSurprise1013
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 31 2020
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There are no losers when eating hot dogs. Only wieners.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 41
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/wyllyam1111
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 19 2020
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What do you call a dog with no legs?

Doesn’t matter they won’t come anyway.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 37
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Project_1nth
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 09 2020
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I named my dog cinnamon

she's a lot of bark

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/justcurious-serious
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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My dog swallowed a bunch of scrabble pieces

When he goes to the bathroom it could spell trouble.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/elster000
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 14 2021
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I went to the zoo today and they only had one dog.

It was a shitzu

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Wavepoolsquad
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2020
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What happens if a cat wins a dog competition during a tornado?

A cathastrophy

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/D4rk3rl1fe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 27 2020
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Why is it so difficult to train dogs to dance?

Because they have two left feet

πŸ‘οΈŽ 35
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/a_dance_with_fire
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2020
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You hear about the dog who liked to chase cars?

He got tired.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ixnayhombray
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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Today I finally told my family about my hot dog addiction

It was really hard but I managed to mustard all the courage to do so

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rafacu_el_dino
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
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Our dog has been a little under the weather so we took him in for a checkup. The vet picked him up, studied him for a bit, sighed and said, "I'm really sorry, but I'm gonna have to put him down." Tears welling in my eyes I sputtered, "Why!? What's wrong with him?"

The vet replied, "Nothing major, he's just really heavy!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 84
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 16 2020
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How do you get a dog to stop

Hit the paws button

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/woodysdad
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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My wife asked me β€œcan vegans have dogs?”

I said: β€œnot for lunch”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/okhtak
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 31 2020
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My weiner dog is so lazy...

Not much dash in that hound

Credit u/themayanacockandlips on r/aww

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NotA_Drug_Dealer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 12 2021
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Apparently a lot of sniffer dogs are just vanishing into thin air.

Police say, they have several leads.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 17 2020
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Why did a man name his dogs Rolex and Timex?

Because they were Watch Dogs.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/D3V1L420
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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I threw a ball for my dog yesterday.

Well, it was his birthday and he looks good in a dinner suit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 78
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/1963Jan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 05 2020
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Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

(credit: Groucho Marx)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/4-8Newday
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 08 2020
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Last night my wife asked if I had seen the dog bowl...

I said, "I didn't know he could!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 81
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Kahnartist81
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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My wife asked me if I’d seen the dog bowl..

I said β€œI didn’t know he could.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FlintTheDad
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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Wife asked if I'd seen the dog bowl...

β€œDidn't even know he played cricket" I replied

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/trendfoll
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 12 2020
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Every day I come home and ask my dog how his day was, and every day he always gives the same answer...

Ruff.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MyLatestInvention
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 26 2020
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I adopted a dog that was owned by a blacksmith.

As soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door

πŸ‘οΈŽ 37
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Perigeesus
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 23 2020
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I went to the zoo the other day but the only animal there was a dog.

It was a Shitzu.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RebellionRob75
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
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What do you call a dog with no legs?

It doesn't matter what you call him..

He wont come anyways

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dead_Man_Talking117
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
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Dogs can’t operate MRI machines.

But catscan.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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