Why should you never have pokemon shower curtains?

Because they might pikachu.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ May 21
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain?

So you’re the one!!

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrPooMD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20
🚨︎ report
It's cold and dark outside, so I have drawn the curtains.
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theMikethe
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Curtains were probably invented by nudists

They didnt want someone to see them changing into something more comfortable

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KnightsOfPuzzles
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I don’t trust my new curtains

They seem a bit shady

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SmilioTM
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09
🚨︎ report
My moms putting curtains up. Perfect pun opportunity.

Mom: β€œMatthew! Can you grab the screws please?”

Me: β€œOh screw this.”

Mom: β€œCan you grab some nails?”

Me: β€œYup.” Sees the curtains up β€œOh wow you’re really nailing it.”

Mom: β€œThe drills on the counter. Would you mind...”

Me: β€œDon’t worry. I know the drill by now.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/demonwithfries
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Me: Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains

Doctor: Pull yourself together

It's a classic/oldie

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KrazyMatty91
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I had an idea to make some curtains that don't need to be fastened

But after the first prototype, that's out the window

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife and I were putting up a curtain rod, and I had previously removed the cap at the end of the rod.

After we finished installing the hooks, and hung the curtains I asked her to hand the cap to me.

"Honey, can you hand me the pole end?"

She was unsure of what I meant, and asked, "What pole end?"

"Pole end is a country in eastern Europe, but I need you to hand me the cap the to the curtain rod."

Groaning ensues...

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheNewBo
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Father: Do you know the difference between a shower curtain and toilet paper?

Son: No.

Father: So you’re the one.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dougbud
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a woman stuck between a curtain and a window?

Annette

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TurboAxolotl
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What does John Steinbeck call his shower curtain?

The drapes of bath

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/YoureAMuenster
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2018
🚨︎ report
A pencil challenged a pair of curtains to a staring contest

They drew.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TomMason26
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2018
🚨︎ report
I complained that I felt like a pair of curtains...

... until my friend convinced me to pull myself together.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/devnodegree
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a set of curtains.

Pull yourself together man!

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShadowDevil123
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2018
🚨︎ report
How to keep a wall from becoming an iron curtain:

Keep stonewalling it till it's curtains.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/flyoverhop
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Curtains might argue during the daytime.

But they always come together at night.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2018
🚨︎ report
When you think about your past and how you've come sofa then you realize there are curtain things you can't change
πŸ‘︎ 157
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HustleUncaged
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2017
🚨︎ report
How many baseball players does it take to hang a curtain?

One. A-Rod

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OCR9
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2018
🚨︎ report
When you think about your past and how you've come sofa then you realize there are curtain things you can't change
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HustleUncaged
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2017
🚨︎ report
Why does Bob Dylan keep a curtain in front of his clock?

Cuz the times they are a' changin!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/little_otis
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2017
🚨︎ report
What does the chair say to the upset curtain? Pull yourself together
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tafelspitz1
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2017
🚨︎ report
Dad joked my wife while measuring curtains.

We only have about an hour and a half to measure then go and purchase curtains before the baby needs a nap
Wife: Be quick please, we only have a small window
Me: Actually its about 2 metres wide
Wife: Groan

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/F1NANCE
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2014
🚨︎ report

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