Senator Cruz didn't like it when an editorial cartoon depicted him as a Borg

His Chief of Staff explained to him that in the US, the First Amendment guaranteed all citizens the right to free speech, and that yes this did indeed include unflattering depictions in newspapers' editorial cartoons.

"You will be a simile, Ted"

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/The_Possum
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 31 2018
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A tip if youโ€™re going to Santa Cruz.

Keep your eyes PEELED for banana slugs.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Commits_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 15 2018
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Ted Cruz won 2 states tonight.

I guess winning Texas and another state is OK.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Jooey_K
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 02 2016
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Texas weather is making my best friend hilarious
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/candyheyn
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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History lesson

Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York. This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day. The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as Sinko de Mayo.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TibtibThePrincess
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 10 2019
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What does santa do when he's driving around the coast of california?

Santa cruz

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Vi3ual
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 03 2018
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Every year Dad has to tell it to SOMEONE...

"It's a little known fact that the Titanic was not only transporting passengers, but was also carrying a large shipment of mayonnaise from Hellman's factories in England to consumers in Mexico. After the Titanic had made its trip to New York, the mayonnaise-- supposedly the largest single shipment of the stuff to ever be delivered to Mexico-- was going to be dropped off in the port city Vera Cruz. But unfortunately, when the ship sank, the Mexicans had lost all of the mayonnaise they had ordered. Extremely saddened by their loss and its economic consequences, the Mexicans declared a day that would go down in history as a holiday of remembrance and mourning. And every year on May the 5th they would celebrate...

"Sinko de Mayo."

hyuh hyuh hyuh hyuh hyuh

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Icaz
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 16 2013
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Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England...

In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York . This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. The Mexican people loved Mayonnaise so much and this loss was so devastating that the Mexican people declared a National day of Mourning which happens every year on the day the shipment was supposed to arrive. This day of course is May 5th or more commonly known as Sinko de Mayo.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/lucy_dogg90210
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 06 2017
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This one's actually from my dad a few days ago

Most people didnโ€™t know that back in 1912, Hellmannโ€™s mayonnaise was manufactured in England.

In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York.

This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico โ€ฆ but as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York . The ship hit an iceberg and sank.

The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning.

The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as โ€ฆSinko De Mayo.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/rIse_four_ten_ten
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 08 2014
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