Crescent Puns

Red Croissant

It's only a phase, after all.

...but it's just a phase.

A quaint little men's class,

a few with class,

some smelling of a gin glass,

some with eyes of a lass,

the remainder eyeing a lad,

but all glad,

and all present,

youngster of the present,

bearders of the crescent,

readers new testaments,

preachers of old testaments,

bearers of saffron tenets,

wearers of white tints,

weird lovers of croissant,

well, all here, will all hear?

we never know,

lets look at the show

 

The English teacher, said,

"how to drink a juice?"

i know, said bart the bartender,

"with vodka and chicken tender"

the weirded beardo now angry,

showed he was a shouter,

wanted to be a bart-ender,

while shushing the crowd,

use a pipe, piped up a voice, loud,

"huh" exclaimed preacher pastor,

"no smoking" he said, showing a guilty fluster ,

"no sir" said the voice,

I'm extra maker,

spoke the voice quicker,

Mr.White scratching head,

"I'm an ex-straw maker",

the air cleared.

 

Proceeding further, Teacher continued,

the class was listening, eyes glued,

"etiquette is important" he said,

"wear napkin before eating",

their faces changed,

pulse now beating,

Mr.White said, "sir, we don't bleed",

an irritated saffron Sundar spoke,

"if you bleed, education you don't need"

the English sir, now a sundered bloke,

calmed the masked fish market,

as his God's fate chisel hammered,

"Do you know how to fork?" he stammered,

a brief silence, and too many whispers later

"I Pen is use sir", said a bright face,

"Do you know how to use a fork?" he corrected,

with damage now done, Silence resumed.

 

>ThePundits

GPS: Turn left on Allwright Crescent, then turn left to stay on Allwright Crescent.

Me: How can I make a left on All-Right crescent?!

I just chuckled to myself.

http://imgur.com/a/GPyVq

After looking at the crescent moon she turned to me and said, "I wonder if the moon is waxing or if it is waning."

To which I responded, "Waning? It's not even cwoudy!"

So my dad and I are driving home from a camping trip. We pull over at a rest stop to grab some dinner. Looking up at the sky, I see the moon is at a crescent. I say to him "Do you think it's waning?" While pointing at the moon. Without looking up, he responds "Waning? It's not even cwoudy!"

Last night we were eating taco ring (circle of crescent rolls filled with taco meat.)

My son says he wants pie for dinner. I give him 3.14 of the circle and say here's your pi.

had a bit of a choking scare when she tried to stuff a whole crescent roll in her mouth.
After she regained her composure, I advised her to slow her roll. Groans abound.

Me (holding out a plate of crescent rolls): Here, buddy, would you like a roll?

Him: Is this a casserole?

I’m worried, but my wife says it’s just a phase.