Critters Puns

A list of puns related to "Critters"

Approximately 95% of all ocean critters remain undiscovered.

The ocean keeps its sea crits.

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👤︎ u/RayInRed
📅︎ Aug 31 2020
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PUN INTENDED : A deck of 54 pun based critter cards. dailycrittercards.com
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👤︎ u/albertog72
📅︎ Dec 17 2014
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I just got thrown out of my local park for arranging the squirrels by height.

They didn’t like my critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/mycorona69
📅︎ Oct 05 2020
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I got kicked out of the park for lining squirrels up by height...

They said I was too critter-sizing

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👤︎ u/SmellyRapscallion
📅︎ Oct 23 2020
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I was thrown out of the local park for arranging the squirrels by height...

Apparently they just can’t take a little critter-sizing!

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👤︎ u/Sjdiver2001
📅︎ Aug 21 2020
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Flea kick
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👤︎ u/thepobv
📅︎ May 17 2016
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Frank and the Pilot's Hat.

The last few weeks have involved my grandmas senile boyfriend moving back to his kids' house while she deals with some medical issues. His kids happen to live on a ranch, so he's helping them out with the critters while he's there. While helping him move in, my dad finds a straw hat out on the porch. So my dad tells him

"Hey Frank, I found you a pilots hat."

To which the innocently senile Frank replies "A pilots hat? What do you suppose I'd do with that?

Dad replies "When you see some shit, you pile it"

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👤︎ u/ShittDickk
📅︎ Nov 07 2014
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I got thrown out of my local park after arranging the squirrels by height.....

They didn’t like me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/18021982
📅︎ Aug 27 2020
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I got thrown out of the park for measuring the squirrels

I guess they didn't want me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/BlakeMP
📅︎ Aug 09 2020
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I got thrown out of my local park after arranging the squirrels by height.

They didn't like me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/WhiskeyChugger
📅︎ Jan 20 2020
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Squirrelly

I got thrown out of a local park for aligning squirrels in order of height. They didn't like me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/MilPens
📅︎ Jan 13 2020
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