23 Hilarious Coverings Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

My embarrassing hobby is covering the fifth letter of the alphabet in a thin layer of gold …

It's a gilt-E pleasure.

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👤︎ u/Negative12DollarBill

📅︎ Apr 29 2021

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I think my wife is covering my rifle collection with glue.

She's denying it, but I'm sticking to my guns.

👍︎ 2k

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👤︎ u/VERBERD

📅︎ Jan 27 2021

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I'm thinking about covering the outside of my house in unhatched chickens

My wife says it will look too boring, but I think it will be egg siding.

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👤︎ u/degggendorf

📅︎ Mar 09 2021

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I’m looking for some kind of outer covering for muscles and bones.

Not for me. A skin for a friend.

👍︎ 11

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👤︎ u/donkeyknuckles

📅︎ Feb 25 2021

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Some people think it's okay to wear your mask over your mouth while not covering your nose.

They're mouthbreathers.

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👤︎ u/ZilchIJK

📅︎ Jan 12 2021

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I'm still figuring out how to properly wear a face covering. Before I could master the art I was robbed of my beloved mask...

It was stolen from right under my nose.

👍︎ 9

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👤︎ u/ramzert

📅︎ Oct 12 2020

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I've finally given up on finding a name for my window coverings made from bug spray...

I call the search Off! It's curtains for that quest!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Nov 04 2020

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My anatomy class is currently covering the skeletal system and my professor is being unreasonable with the amount of material we need to know so I made an office hour appointment to speak with him.

You can bet your ass I have a bone to pick with him.

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👤︎ u/sarcasticpremed

📅︎ Jul 27 2020

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Wolverine walks in on Jean Grey sneezing without covering her mouth..

...and says, "Hygiene".

👍︎ 10

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👤︎ u/r1pen

📅︎ Oct 05 2020

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Someone recently came back from surgery after an accident with their eye. They got a new eye and a mechanical cover that can shine light while covering the eye

The doctors called it eyeLEDs

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👤︎ u/TestSubject_02

📅︎ Sep 17 2020

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What is it called when a bunch of people in face coverings leave a building?

Mask exodus

👍︎ 7

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👤︎ u/jtnels0

📅︎ Aug 04 2020

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My anatomy class is covering the nervous system and I don't get any of this stuff.

It's so nerve-wracking.

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👤︎ u/sarcasticpremed

📅︎ Jul 27 2020

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I was carrying a bowl of chili from the kitchen and my dog ran in and caused me to drop the entire bowl on top of him, covering him in chili.

Now he’s a chili dog.

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👤︎ u/superbrooke

📅︎ May 25 2020

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My friend told me a joke about the covering of the iris. Sure, I laughed...

But it was cornea as ever.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Jun 13 2020

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2 Detectives are covering a case with a farmer

Detective 1: explain what happened please

Farmer: someone has been stealing my radishes for the past 2 months!

Detective 1: what do you think detective 2?

Detective 2: idk Beets me...

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👤︎ u/Sam_Jassim_is_here

📅︎ Apr 25 2020

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Went to my date’s house after dinner last night and saw she had a Soviet flag covering the entire wall

I knew that was a big red flag

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👤︎ u/Smoothmcdoodles

📅︎ Dec 28 2019

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I'm thinking of buying protective coverings for all my windows

I shutter to think of the cost

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👤︎ u/hotsprings1234

📅︎ Apr 08 2020

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For the last two weeks I've been walking around dressed in cladding and rubber pipe covering. /r/Jokes/comments/fnqw1l/…

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👤︎ u/mykeuk

📅︎ Mar 23 2020

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I have some deep-seated regret for covering my organs in gold.

I have internalized gilt.

👍︎ 5

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👤︎ u/ToastGhost18

📅︎ Dec 02 2019

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If you are smothered by hanging window coverings with no chance of escape...

...it's curtain death for you.

👍︎ 8

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👤︎ u/Joesdad65

📅︎ May 30 2019

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I never knew covering up my bald spot would cost so much.

But it's a price I'm willing toupée.

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👤︎ u/Lucifer9845

📅︎ Jan 05 2019

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I was told off by my fellow hikers for covering my walking stick in dried grapes.

Well, now I'm raisin cane!

👍︎ 6

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👤︎ u/garbagearmy

📅︎ Oct 01 2018

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I just invented a machine that trims window coverings.

Prepare to have your blinds mowed.

👍︎ 5

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👤︎ u/this_time_i_mean_it

📅︎ Jul 11 2017

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