HOW DOES A FILE CONSUME MEMORY,IN TERA-BITES😁
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Manlybutterly
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
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I try and keep track of how much toffee I consume.

I keep a Heath Ledger

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zaxxonn26
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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If you consume pot brownies...

...does that make you a weedeater?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Algaean
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2020
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Today in veterinary class we learned that cows have 4 stomachs to digest the grasses they consume...

It's graze anatomy.

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Do not consume if seal is broken
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CREEPONATER
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2019
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Who can consume all of world's Petroleum?

Ameri Can.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyjarvis
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
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Do not consume if "Seal" is broken imgur.com/k2Ja6gv
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thommu11
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2018
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What do you call it when canon ammunition consumes other canon ammunition?

Canonbalism

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Noeltm
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2019
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What do you call burnt bread that can't consume dairy?

Black toast intolerant

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MF62SW
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
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My friend has an unhealthy obsession with broiled bread due to not being able to consume dairy,

I think he lacks toast intolerance.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mellothewise
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2019
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What do ghosts consume in order to get drunk?

Boos.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrilleMega
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2017
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What do you call a guy that can't consume milk and must have a piece of toast by him at all times?

Lack-toast intolerant

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Playa41
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2017
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Did you hear about the dangerous alcoholic who consumed his booze from a sizzling Chinese frying pan?

He liked to drink risky on the woks

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πŸ‘€︎ u/incredibleinkpen
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2021
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I just called up Gamestop consumer support.

They asked me to hold it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kishore05
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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Texas Prisoner Found Dead After Consuming Smuggled Fish Eggs

He died on Death Roe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CalmingVisionary
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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Why was was the unrepentant Roman who consumed his wife neither surprised nor scared when he was thrown into the Colosseum?

He was gladiator already.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trimofdoom
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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Shake well before consuming

Contents may have settled, started a family, and proliferated in the container.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Camo5
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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Relationships are like fat people....

Most of them don't work out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2021
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I used to eat watches and clocks for every meal, but I had to stop.

It was too time consuming.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bombsaway1083
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2021
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I ate a clock yesterday and it was very time consuming.

especially when I went for seconds

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πŸ‘€︎ u/John_Doez_
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
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Eating My Watch Was Time Consuming

Especially when I went back four seconds.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VengefulVendetta
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
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What does a clock do when it’s hungry?

It goes back four seconds.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/remoonl
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
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I ate a watch the other day

It was time consuming. I ended up going back for seconds.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/erajter
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
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i tried to eat a clock yesterday.

It was quite time consuming.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/agumeis
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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Remember how Red Skull was being consumed by fire in the end of Captain America

Guess you could say he needed a fire HYDRAnt

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πŸ‘€︎ u/888prosperity
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
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Time consuming
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Athu-Chan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
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My doctor said that I might die because I accidentally consumed clay.

I'm shitting bricks to be honest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
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Don't ever try eating a clock if you're in a hurry

It's time consuming

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
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I brought home baby cow meat for the dog, which he ate, threw up, and re-consumed.

It was very re-veal-ing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2020
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Cats are evil

But a dog will consume your sole

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shredbmc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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Eastern Europe produces a lot of techno, but it's primarily consumed by just one region:

Moravia

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OratioFidelis
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
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What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark?

"Do not consume if seal is broken."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/djkress
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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This sounds very time consuming, especially if they go for seconds. i.reddituploads.com/633d7…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheCats_Bananas
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2016
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What do you call a series of short strokes induced by consuming pizza?

Little Seizures

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Im_a_dum_bum
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Yesterday I ate a clock....

It was very time consuming, especially when I went back for seconds.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2021
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Eating a clock is very time consuming.
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
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Eating a clock is very time consuming.

That is all. I'm sorry.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PhillLacio
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2020
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I just ate a clock

It was very time consuming

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cuntillious
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Yesterday I ate a clock it was very time consuming. I had to go back for seconds.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/epic420698
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Have you ever tried to eat a clock?

It's very time consuming.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperGrandPatzer
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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Last night I ate a clock

It was very time consuming.

Especially when I went back for seconds.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ethereal_sandwich
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Yesterday I ate a clock

It was so good I went back for seconds

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AshamedTurtwig
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you ever tried to eat a clock?

It's very time consuming.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Confusing_Musings
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Boy, eating a clock is VERY time consuming
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DankalorYT
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2018
🚨︎ report
Eating a clock is very.... time consuming
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rapidz-Infinity
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Eating a clock is very time consuming
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chrrisrrose
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2018
🚨︎ report

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