My twins give me chills, dehydration, fatigue, fever, loss of appetite, and extreme diarrhea.

Their names are Sam and Ella.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anddditburns
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Why call it Netflix and Chill..

.. when you can call it β€˜Nutflix’ already

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Suck_Some
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
This morning, my dad told me something that gave me the chills.

He said, β€œI’m turning off the heating.”

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
USPS has no chill
πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NickStepanek
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Screw Netflix and chill

How about Hulu and do you? πŸ’€

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Premystic
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Just want to Netflix and chill out while watching some...
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/masonsnow
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Net fix and chill imgur.com/q3wWcDu
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/digdilem
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2018
🚨︎ report
Someone told me to be chill out

But the heating was on

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/olordhelp
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2020
🚨︎ report
So, chill
πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/moses10960
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife loves her car, and I trust her driving, but she just has no chill.

That's why we take my car during the summer.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/truejamo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Caveman and Cavewoman do for weekend chill out.. ?

.. Went out Clubbin'

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I told my Dad to Chill,, and he said, "I'm Chill"

And i said, "I thought You Were Dad".

I Dad Joked My Dad.

I'M THE REVOLUTION

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BrianGarfield
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Net fix and chill
πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pottsie03
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2019
🚨︎ report
*guy in the red shirt* : "Dude, chill out! You're always so in-tents. You need to relax!!
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stha118
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Good bye Netflix and Chill

It’s now Disney Plus You and Me

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I have a plan to chill myself to -273.15 Celsius - My friends say I'm crazy...

...But I think I'll be 0K.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paul_caspian
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2016
🚨︎ report
LOL chill dawg
πŸ‘︎ 90
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sonujohny
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
🚨︎ report
Why are turtles so chill?

They do sea weed!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HappyHobbitses
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2019
🚨︎ report
People say having a missing toe makes you more easily agitated with people, but honestly I’m more chill.

Guess I Lack toes and Tolerant

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeoNite
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Chill spot ...
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DepletedGeranium
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Google assistant got no chill!!
πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/garvitmastaadmi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Never seen such a chill bear
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NearlyHame
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2018
🚨︎ report
Security at Los Angeles International Airport was very chill

I guess it was LAX.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2016
🚨︎ report
Highly chill Dad
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/4foryouglencoco
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2013
🚨︎ report
Go to chill with my old man for a minute.

The chair I usually sit on is covered in papers.

I tell him, "I'm gonna sit on it," whilst moving the papers out of the way.

He replies, "Don't do that. Sitting on tax hurts"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ablette531
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2019
🚨︎ report
And Chills
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/___jimenez__
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2018
🚨︎ report
My son told me to chill

I said "I am chill"

He said "I thought you were dad"

I got reverse dad-joked. I guess it's alright since he's a dad now.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bentnotbroken96
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2018
🚨︎ report
R/vegetarian is such a chill, drama-free sub.

They never have any beef.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PM_ME_YOUR_KOALAZ
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2017
🚨︎ report
This joke is pretty chill...

What do you call an uncaring royal that lives in the poles? An Ice Queen.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HerChewieBear
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2018
🚨︎ report
I met a group of chill Russians the other day

They call themselves the "Sobiet Union"

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/elite4caleb
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Chill

is a cool word.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LearningBJ
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the Mexican Netflix & Chill?

Netflix Enchilada

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emichbe
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2015
🚨︎ report
I work in a hospital. It's pretty great because if you mess up people are really chill about it, and they let you try again. It's really a good environment because...

We'd be a really shitty hospital if we didn't have any patience.

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/T3hN1nj4
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2014
🚨︎ report
My dad told me something last night that gave me the chills.

He said, β€œI’m turning off the heating.”

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
🚨︎ report
My dad just told me something that sent a chill down my spine.

He said, β€œI’m turning off the heating.”

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2018
🚨︎ report

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