Jay-Z is DMing a D&D campaign for his son.

Jay-Z's son is playing a fighter and is engaged in a grueling fight with a troll. The troll is clearly too high a difficulty for the fighter.

"Dad," Jay-Z's son exclaims in frustration. "The troll is destroying me!" Just at that moment, from behind a nearby hill appears an army of goblins led by what appears to be an intoxicated lich.

Jay-Z looks at his son and replies with a smirk, "If you're having troll problems, I feel bad for you, son. I've got 99 goblins and a lich on rum."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JinTaisa
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
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The wizard in my campaign just got handed a whole bunch of random, unlabeled Sesame Street videos.

He's going to learn how to count or spell.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/arrenlex
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2021
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In our next Dnd campaign, the 4 heroes are all going to be singing wizards.

A regular bard-ershop quartet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zeesmurf
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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The campaign to elect Kamala Harris as Vice President

...was the most ex-pence-ive in history.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nwhaught
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
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Advertisers for cream cheese are running schmear campaigns...

...and they should all be lox'd up for their capers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ceelogreenicanth
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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In the last weeks campaign, I was asked to get the opinions of women on what shampoo were they currently using........

The most common answer I got was...................... "EEEEKK!! HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET INTO MY BATHROOM???!!!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ball5deeper
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
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It's important to lose closely at lawn signs during election campaigns....

Last time I cast my vote for a real estate agent.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cumsock17
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
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Apparently, Kanye West has ended his Presidential campaign.

And just shortly after starting it too. But you know how the saying is: "Yeezy come Yeezy go".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NomadStar
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
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Given social distancing regulations, a ton of condiment companies are being forced to cancel July 4th campaigns like sponsored concerts, where they planned to hand out signature color sunglasses to attendees.

Bad idea, Heinz-Sight 2020.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeusJZ
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
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Why did the stool quit his election campaign?

He didn’t have any backing !

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2020
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Idea for Oreo ad campaign
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaddyMac2112
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2018
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Mikhail Gorbachev started an anti-alcohol campaign in USSR in 1980s. People went crazy because of the restrictions on selling of alcohol. An old Soviet joke went like this:

β€œA disaffected and angry citizen, fed up of standing in lines for vodka, decided to go assassinate Gorbachev. He soon came back and ruefully reported that the lines to assassinate Gorbachev were even longer than the lines for vodka.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OtsuKotsu
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
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This year is a godsend for every optometrist's social media marketing campaign.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ass-with-class
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2020
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I hired a firm to create an advertising campaign for me. Their idea was to use workbench clamps to hold the ads up for viewing.

I think that's just bad ad vise.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thebikerdad
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
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What explains β€œSleepy Joe’s” explosion of success on Super Tuesday, after never having won a primary in multiple previous campaigns?

He was Biden his time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BluPrince
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2020
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Police forces are deflating the stats of seized drugs during the drug war campaign.

Apparently, they didn't do the math but they did the meth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Baldomccoy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
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Do you know what elves rely on during political campaigns?

Propagandalf

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alpino14
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
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O'Rourke thought he could keeping going in his presidential campaign.

But then he thought he Beto not.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/REVDR
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
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If Michelle Obama were to run for president in 2020 on the campaign promise of legalizing marijuana, what would her campaign slogan be?

When they go low, we get high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tydyety5
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
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Next political campaign slogan: "Hindsight is 2020"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vanmelee25
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2019
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I appreciate this ad campaign centered around a pun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nbarlam
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2019
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[request] puns for a campaign slogan involving my name

I’m running for senior class president and my name is Miranda Alfaro, I need a good slogan since my toughest opponent named Chase is β€œchase your dreams” thank you to whoever makes me one!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mirandaalfaro
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Dad: "Did you hear about the new Ebola ad campaign?"

Me: "Uh, no..."

Dad: "It went viral."

Me: ΰ² _ΰ² 

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JackLemon13
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2014
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Bro, can you tell me a way to inform people about my campaign?

Yeah, brochure.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shpap
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2018
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A quick journey into the merchandising genius of Hillary's campaign gift shop. [x-post from /u/JaroLink in /r/The_Donald] sli.mg/a/2aSZUr
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tellman1257
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2016
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Many campaigns dissuade feeding crows nowadays

Because the murder rate was at an all time high

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AndrewF2003
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2018
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Using puns in your marketing campaign?

That’s Dadvertising!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/procrastiprov
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2018
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Me homebrewing some fantasy drinks for my campaign, when my dad walks into my room, sees what im doing...

and asks me if I need some help getting the creative juices flowing.

It's a common thing for him to say, so I only got it after he left. I don't think he even realized it himself. At this point I'm too afraid to ask.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/B1gb3ast
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2017
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I got sick after my last D&D campaign, I couldn't stop talking like a wizard.

I think I may have a staff inflection!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SalvadorSmall
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2016
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First campaign? Staff will have him on a short leash. mediaite.com/online/dog-a…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rpconnolly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2014
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Washington Post Headline: IBM ends campaign urging women to hack hair dryers after heated blowback

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-switch/wp/2015/12/08/ibm-ends-campaign-urging-women-to-hack-hair-dryers-after-heated-blowback/?hpid=hp_hp-cards_hp-card-technology%3Ahomepage%2Fcard

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πŸ‘€︎ u/samsdeadfishclub
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2015
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Thought this group might like to submit some of their masterpieces to VIZIO's new "Dadisms" campaign.

http://viziodadisms.com/
I post this now in the hopes that hilarity could be the byproduct

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πŸ‘€︎ u/minuteman_d
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2016
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