A priest an imam and a rabbit walk into a blood bank

The rabbit says, "I think I might be a type O."

πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnooRobots9182
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do bank robbers hate electricity?

Because of the copper in the wires.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yotamgosh
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
🚨︎ report
A midget who was a fortune teller robbed a bank

The call went out that a small medium was at large

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EndymionMM
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is the doctor at the blood bank picky about her dates?

She has A type

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cresendo77
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
A bank was offering loan without interest.

I flat out refused. Why would I take money from someone who has no interest?

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
🚨︎ report
When a ghost opens a bank vault by itself...

Its a poulterheist

... I’ve been playing too much phasmophobia

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
🚨︎ report
Why can't the power bank see his kids?

Because he has a battery charge

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jet_001
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
I just downloaded the new app which will evaluate you bank account and tell you which Apple product you can afford. Turns out I can afford,

Apple juice

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lisajean1234
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Thai bank

The BahtRoom

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DiabetesInACan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest a minister and a rabbit walk into a blood bank

The rabbit says I think I'm a type-o

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tjeters
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Today at the bank some old lady asked if I could help check her balance.

So I pushed her over.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trendfoll
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the tree do when the bank was closed?

Started its own branch.

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imholt11
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
A man walks into a sperm bank

The doctor says "would you get a load of this guy?"

πŸ‘︎ 194
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πŸ‘€︎ u/baconlover09
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to the bank and asked the teller to check my balance.

She shoved me pretty hard but I didn't fall down.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imholt11
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
An old lady walked into the bank and asked me if I could help her check her balance.

So I pushed her over.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Randomguy6282
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
A Frog Walks into a Bank

A frog walks into a bank and approaches the teller, whose name plate says Patricia Whack.
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $50,000 loan to take a vacation."
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name.
"KermitΒ Jagger. My father is Mick Jagger. It will be fine to authorize the loan, I know your manager."
Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
"Sure, how about this," said Kermit as he produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
Patty walks into the manager's office and proceeds to tell her, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $50,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." Patty holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"
The bank manager looks back at her and says..."It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/josephlied
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Two birds run into a bank

Bird 1: what are we doing

Bird 2: we robin

Ik delivery couldve been better but leave me be best my hungover ass can do rn

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AnBuachaillEire
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
The worlds shortest man and worlds tallest man have just robbed a bank.

The police are searching high and low for the culprits.

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiger7971
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the baker say when he robbed a bank?

I kneaded the dough

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
My wifes bank card was stolen 3 days ago.

So far they have spent less than her everyday, so I'm not saying anything.

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrBrianWeldon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Reddit user say after detonating a bomb inside a bank?

EDIT: Wow, this blew up! Thanks for the gold!

πŸ‘︎ 184
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Altus-
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
This just in: 2 men broke into the city bank using nothing more than a few mannequin limbs.

Officials say we are dealing with an armed robbery

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I thought getting a bank account would be boring

but I've slowly gained interest

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
My piggy bank is getting super old...

I may have to change it out.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/poiuy03
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Reddit user say after detonating a bomb in a bank?

Edit: Wow, this blew up! Thanks for the gold kind stranger!

Edit: Credit to r/Teenagers for this

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ustydud
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I never really knew my dad. Mom said he would be out at the bank all night.

She said he was a real loaner.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/legendary-jake
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the baker rob the bank?

He needed more dough.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AT360306
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
🚨︎ report
When Biden pressed Trump about his Chinese bank account, Trump admitted...

I lost Yuan

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/holymolybreath
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
i lost my job at the bank on my very first day.

A lady asked me to check her balance, so i pushed her over.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/specklesinc
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the bank hire a dog that collects sticks?

They needed a new branch manager.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MarioMakerProcess
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What was the one legged Man doing in the Bank ?

.. Checking his balance.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
One day in the bank an old lady asked me to check her balance...

So I pushed her.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/levonsafaryan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A monk, a priest and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.

The rabbit says "I think I'm a type o"

πŸ‘︎ 739
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TomCanBe
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the tree do when they couldn’t find a bank for them?

They opened their own branch.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Smart-fridge20
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
🚨︎ report
England doesn't have a kidney bank,

but it does have a Liverpool.

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
🚨︎ report
A dwarf psychic robbed a bank today.

The news reported that there's a small medium at large.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
🚨︎ report
How did a musician steal from a bank without being noticed?

He took notes

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Soulfox1988
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
A guy walks into the bank, pulls out a gun, points it at the teller and screams, β€œGive me all your money or you’re geography!”

The teller replies, β€œDon’t you mean history?”

The robber says, β€œDon’t change the subject!"

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I lost my job at the bank today which is a shame.

I was taking home $25,000 dollars a week.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day.

A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

πŸ‘︎ 110
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I withdrew one dollar from the bank but they called the police

The nine zeroes after the one don’t count. Right? They add up to nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rant-rant-rant
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
An old lady asked me if I could help her check her balance at the bank.

so I pushed her over.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/weendul
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
A man walks into a sperm bank.

The doctor says, "Would you get a load of this guy?"

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wmd1234
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.

The rabbit says, β€œI think I might be a type O.”

πŸ‘︎ 150
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PatriotASR
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Guy walks into a sperm bank

Doctor says "will you get a load of this guy?"

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/QuellinIt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest, a minister and a rabbit walk into a blood bank...

The rabbit says β€œI think I’m a Type-O.”

πŸ‡πŸ©ΈπŸ’β€β™€οΈ

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joyfulpunner
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank...

The rabbit says, β€œI think I might be type o.”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jigglytep
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I lost my job at the bank my very first day

A woman asked me to check her balance so I pushed her over

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report

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