What kind of music frightens balloons?

Pop music.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cunt_Puffin
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What type of music do balloons hate?

Pop music

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πŸ‘€︎ u/howiewu0402
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know why the cost of balloons is going up?

Inflation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SteadyingRuck
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I forgot all about the balloon I attached to the water hose outside!

Edit: oh wow, this blew up!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I needed hot air balloon pilots for an event. I could either hire or use prison labor.

Dad told me I should weigh the pros and cons first.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/exaball
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are balloons so expensive?

The prices keep going up due to inflation

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toku-Nation
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I was arrested yesterday for stealing helium balloons,

The police held me for a while then let me go.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call the tv show where hot air balloons are attached to peoples cars

Blimp My Ride

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brandon_Mercer078
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Neighbours outside just had a reveal party. From all the hooting and hollering after the balloon pop...

I can report that they are having an owl

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πŸ‘€︎ u/50ShadesOfPalmBay
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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The comments on the post of a video where a man who flew from Emirates (using hot air balloons) and was found in Oman in a critical condition. I doubt if that video Israel..
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LogangYeddu
πŸ“…︎ Feb 29 2020
🚨︎ report
The comments on the post of a video where a man who flew from Emirates (using hot air balloons) and was found in Oman in a critical condition. I doubt if that video Israel..
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LogangYeddu
πŸ“…︎ Feb 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she will let it go.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/invertedparadoxxx
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Daughter had a balloon with a penny in it.

So, for Easter, my wife and I got our 2-year-old an array of balloons from a delivery service, including some pre-inflated pieces you could β€œbuild your own butterfly” with, etc. It was pretty cool, but coolest of all was this clear balloon pretty tightly inflated with a single penny in it, and if you shook the balloon enough, the penny would eventually find its way to circling the inside of the balloon.

Those balloons lasted for weeks, until today. If you’ve ever seen a clear balloon deflate, you know it gets a little yellow and opaque.

My wife found it laying around and brought it to me, saying, β€œThis looks like a condom with a penny in it.” And I said, β€œThat’s why they call it a money shot.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dormsta
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of music does a balloon liseten to?

Pop!

^Also ^this ^is ^my ^first ^joke, ^so ^sorry ^if ^someone ^has ^made ^it ^before ^but ^I ^haven't ^seen ^it ^(yet)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Annabeth666
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
How did Pixar decide on a name for the movie about an elderly man who attached balloons to his house?

They made it Up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dontstoprock
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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Why do balloons filled with helium cost more than balloons sold in packages?

Inflation

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Why don't balloons do drugs.

If they get to high they'll get busted

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jojoquin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know that the first ever balloons were made out of animal intestines and organs?

That means the first balloons weren't balloon animals, but ballooned animals.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Roivas14
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon

Cause she’ll let it go

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fruitloops-420
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does the price of balloons keep going up?

Inflation

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tygerhavvk
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I covered a balloon in peanut butter, but it couldn't fly, it just went straight down. Then I covered a balloon in jelly, but that one couldn't fly either.

It went down like a Pb balloon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zaros262
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
🚨︎ report
The only thing I got for my wife on her birthday was a big helium balloon.

It didn’t go down very well.

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of music do balloons hate?

Pop.

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Never trust advice from a balloon.

They’re just full of hot air.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
🚨︎ report
So I walked past a store in my hometown that sells only balloons

...and I thought to myself "what clowns are keeping this business afloat?"

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I wanted to be a hot air balloon pilot

But that career never really got off the ground

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PreviousWater
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
🚨︎ report
I dont make jokes about balloons

They tend to get carried away

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PdawgUltimate
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Why can’t Elsa hold a balloon?

Because she’ll let it go

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πŸ‘€︎ u/walker_922
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
My young son β€œsaid” he made dinner today. He brought me a banana like balloon on a hot dog bun. Confused I said β€œummmm.. thank you .. but...what’s this??”

He said it’s a Halloweenie!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bad11ama
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Some people say filling balloon animals with helium is wrong.

But whatever floats your goat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the scientist say when he popped two helium balloons?

He He.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shipostingcat
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Haven’t seen this on here yet, so to to keep the Elsa theme going...Why don’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she’ll let it go.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aquariumsarecool
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
I've got a friend who works with helium balloons.

They speak very highly of everyone.

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nickl444
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What music are balloons scared of?

Pop music!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/B-man44
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Pixar is releasing a sequel to Up, where the old man gets on a balloon and annoys people.

It’s called Up 2: No good.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Big ass balloon
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deathlysin
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of music are balloons afraid of?

Pop music

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/H8MACH1NE_666
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Apparently the cost of balloons is rising

Well, that's inflation for ya

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToxianLeader
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend decided to propose to his online girlfriend using balloons. But then they finally met.

He immediately popped the question.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Wanna hear a joke about balloons?

Oops, it just got away from me!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommyBoi69696969
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2019
🚨︎ report
The hot air balloon driver is refusing to come down, and the cops are still trying to figure out why.

Everything is still up in the air.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I hear balloon prices are up

It’s due to inflation

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TDubsForever
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2018
🚨︎ report
From my niece "Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?"

"Because she will just let it go." Ive had the biggest smile all day!!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Asurmen32
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the balloon go near the needle?

He wanted to be a pop star.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NerdPapaya69
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s the type of music a balloon hates?

Pop music

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πŸ“…︎ May 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What did helium say to the balloon?

Lighten up

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πŸ‘€︎ u/biphoenix
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2018
🚨︎ report
My balloon popped. Can I get reimburst?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/resmungomandinga
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Every balloon store i go to tells me that my balloons are just going to fly away and i’m sick of it!

I just want a regular balloon, no strings attached!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pocoparker
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the least favorite music of balloons

pop music

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πŸ‘€︎ u/goose000444
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2019
🚨︎ report
How might one feel after popping a balloon that had been rubbing against their hair?

Ex-static

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuhDerek
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
🚨︎ report
The price of balloons is going up

Experts say it is due to inflation

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Please don’t post another video of balloons

I’ve seen them blow op multible times

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πŸ‘€︎ u/livingburjkhalifa
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend just found work at a balloon company.

He got a blowjob

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pawluige_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the balloon factory worker fire their employee?

Because he kept letting them down...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Biiig_AL
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What did a balloon said to another balloon?

Be careful with the cactussssssssssssss

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cyead
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the balloon party?

They wanted Britney to play but they were afraid of the pop music

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πŸ‘€︎ u/david7494
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife is pissed that I got her a helium balloon for her birthday.

It didn’t go down very well.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2019
🚨︎ report
A hot air balloon company went out of business

Because high inflation rates

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πŸ‘€︎ u/asbjorn124
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Why do clowns always have such long balloons?

Because they always get the kids to blow them.

(I’m sorry)

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LethalPianist
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2018
🚨︎ report
A family of balloons

Here's a joke my dad told me. Sorry if you've heard it, but I found it hilarious, and I think you might enjoy it.

In a small town in the suburbs, there was a small family of balloons. There was a mummy balloon, a daddy balloon, and a small child balloon. Every night the boy would sleep between his parents, but his father had had enough.

"son, I know you love sleeping between us, but you're getting a bit too old for it., " the father said. "You're nearly 8, you're a big boy, and your mother and I think you should sleep in your own bed from now on. You can stay tonight but starting tomorrow we want you in your own bed. Do you understand?"

"Yeah dad, I understand..." the boy said with a maudlin tinge to his voice.

"okay son, I love you."

"love you too dad"

The next night the boy tried sleeping in his own bed, but there was a storm outside. It was a dark, ominous storm - the kind of storm that sounds like a cataclysm for the end of the world.

The boy was scared, so he went to sleep

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aesyr_raps
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2018
🚨︎ report
Two balloons are floating through the air. One balloon says to the other, β€œwatch out for that cactus!”

The other balloon says, β€œwhat cactusssssssssssssssssssssssssssss”

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RoyTheShip
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2018
🚨︎ report
I wrote β€œWould you marry me?” on a balloon to propose to my girlfriend.

Then I started getting cold feet, and popped the question.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Why were the prices of the balloons more expensive than last time?

The prices were inflated

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2018
🚨︎ report
I went to a town made of balloons and got stuck.

I was soft locked.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NINJAQKk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2018
🚨︎ report
What is a balloon’s favorite drug?

Helium, because it gets them high.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WebWheat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Two balloons are flying across the desert

When suddenly one shouts: "It's a cactus-s-s-s"

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mitk0o0o
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2017
🚨︎ report
What was the last thing the balloon said to his father?

Watch me, pop!

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BinaryBiker
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2018
🚨︎ report
I’ve been trying to start a hot air balloon business

I just can’t seem to get it off the ground

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jerodsanto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Dad balloon that disappears?

Pops!

(Dad themed dad joke)

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JosaFrichard
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2018
🚨︎ report
My mate lives in a hot air balloon.

He's got the high life.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2018
🚨︎ report
Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she'll let it go!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_Martys_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2018
🚨︎ report
So it's my boys birthday and my wife reminds me to blow up some balloons ..

Minds gets to pondering next minute I say to her "the balloons seem to be wounded... should I helium?" I'm certain the groan could be heard from blocks away!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OscarFish86
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2018
🚨︎ report
What is the musical equivalent of a lead balloon?

A Led Zeppelin

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Homer_Simpson2
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2018
🚨︎ report
A daughter is dressed in a grape vine suit where the grapes are made of balloons for Halloween...

The dad says, β€œI bet if you pop one of those balloons she’ll let out a little wine.”

His wife just rolled her eyes and went back to watching her daughter, while the dad laughed to himself.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DogsGoBork
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the balloon prices rise?

Inflation . . . . . . . Also serious economic issues in the United States which will hopefully be addressed soon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDestroyer575
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Balloon in a tree

Brother: Is that a "Frozen" balloon up in that tree?

Me: Looks like it...some kid must have accidentally "Let it go."

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/danomano
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2016
🚨︎ report
In 1998 a balloon cost 2 pence. Today a balloon filled with air will cost you 10 pence.

That's inflation for you.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2018
🚨︎ report
2 balloons are floating in the desert

one says to the other, - Careful, there is a cactusssssssssssssssssssssssssss

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Espadajin
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2017
🚨︎ report
balloon guy dad [x-post from /r/me_irl]

http://i.imgur.com/P7Iytyq.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 183
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OatmealChef
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2014
🚨︎ report
Mommy Balloon and Daddy Balloon have a little Baby Balloon and for the first few weeks, he sleeps in the same bed with Mommy Balloon and Daddy Balloon…

…but as he grows older and bigger, Daddy Balloon insists he sleeps in his own bed.

Baby Balloon doesn't like being all alone, he misses his Mommy and Daddy so much, that after a few nights, he tries to sneak back into Mommy Balloon and Daddy Balloon's bed, only to find that he had grown too big to fit in the bed with them!

He decides to let some air out of Mommy Balloon, but there's still not enough room, so he let's some air out of Daddy Balloon, but again there's not enough room, so he lets some air out of himself and finally he fits into the bed!

Well, the following morning Daddy Balloon is furious!

"I am very disappointed with you!" says Daddy Balloon. "Not only have you let your Mother down, but you have let me down and let yourself down!"

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2017
🚨︎ report
I wasn't surprised prices of balloons went up

There's always inflation in the balloon business

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kelson93
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2017
🚨︎ report
Rob the balloon man (x-post from me_irl)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/live4lifelegit
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2015
🚨︎ report
Have you heard balloon prices are going up?

It's due to inflation

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chickymomo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2017
🚨︎ report
What type of music do balloons hate?

Pop music!

πŸ‘︎ 108
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are balloons so expensive

Inflation

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PdawgUltimate
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What type of music do balloons hate?

Pop music!

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What type of music do balloons hate?

Pop music!

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What type of music do balloons hate?

Pop music!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of music do balloons hate?

Pop music.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EggShellBuddyPal
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of music do balloons hate the most?

pop

πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1ufff
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2019
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What kind of music do balloons hate the most?

pop

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2019
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Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she’ll let it go

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pinkrobe67
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2019
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Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she will let it go

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MarlinsBB
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
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Why did the balloon go near the needle?

He wanted to be a pop star.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RottenMind62
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2018
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