Seal of approval
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/prlmn
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Seal of approval
πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mliepins11
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I got his seal of approval. v.redd.it/ps7izkqtaq931
πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Invalleria
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Seal of approval
πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/spikspark86
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2018
🚨︎ report
The cutest approval.
πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sonujohny
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2018
🚨︎ report
This gets the Seal of Approval.
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2018
🚨︎ report
This meme has my seal of approval
πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/live4lifelegit
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Can i get your seal of approval?
πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/29DavesLater
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2017
🚨︎ report
Dad joked my sister, got a dad nod of approval.

My dad, sister and I were driving in the car when she pointed out a construction site.

Her: "They're putting in a Duck Donuts over there." Me: "Oh. I heard they're not going to take credit cards." H: "What? Why not?" M: "I don't know, but they'll only take bills."

Took her a few seconds to get it. Dad just looked at me and nodded.

πŸ‘︎ 216
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFarLeft
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2014
🚨︎ report
Literal seal of approval.
πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jasonjuniorgray
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2015
🚨︎ report
Got a defetead sigh from my son and a nod of approval from a fellow dad.

Was waiting in line at the consession stands to buy popcorn and a drink.

Me, "What do you want son?"
Son, "Can I get a large popcorn and an raspberry Icee?"
Me in a very contemplative tone, "You want an Icee, hmm, I see"

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Deathlui
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2015
🚨︎ report
Got the nod of approval from my dad

Got home and walked into the kitchen, something smelt really good. Walked over to the slow cooker and see food in there. Go and find my dad and ask "is it alright if I have some of the food from the slow cooker?" He replies "yes" and on my way out the room he shouts "its chilli by the way!" I walk back into the room with a smug grin and ask "oh, so should I warm it up?" After a second, he clicks and I get the satisfying nod.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Keepoccino
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2014
🚨︎ report
Dadjoked my sister and got my Dad's approval

Sister: "Do you like Mushrooms, Alex?"

Me: "I can't say that there is Mushroom in my heart for them."

When my Sister retold this to my Dad, he let out a laugh and said he was proud of me!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/alexl1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2015
🚨︎ report
pun police approves
πŸ‘︎ 119
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zaq-frost
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
🚨︎ report
Joe Biden approves
πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jacob_Young6138
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
🚨︎ report
Our cat didn't approve of my pats...

They weren't up to scratch.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/psychswot
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17
🚨︎ report
Why wouldn't the fish inspector approve the clam's new shell?

Because.....

It wasn't a-fish-shell

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/voidtype
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09
🚨︎ report
After a year of waiting, my publisher finally approved my book on gardening

It's about Thyme.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flashblazer
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03
🚨︎ report
A Vegetarian Claimed to be my Girlfriend

Which is strange because I'd never seen herbivore

πŸ‘︎ 98
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tryze
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
🚨︎ report
Dwane The Iraq Johnson would approve
πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rlaff5
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28
🚨︎ report
My son was rejected from Indiana University. Feeling persistent, he asked me if he should call one of the advisors and plead for admission.

I told him beggars can’t be Hoosiers.

πŸ‘︎ 285
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16
🚨︎ report
I quit my job as a postman when they handed me my first letter to deliver.

I looked at it and thought, β€œThis isn’t for me.”

πŸ‘︎ 335
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 28
🚨︎ report
I hate telling people I'm a taxidermist.

When they ask, "So, what do you do for a living?" I just say, "Oh, you know... stuff."

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bellazelle
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10
🚨︎ report
I sea what you did there
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lekh27
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11
🚨︎ report
So, 3 nuns die in a car crash and end up before the gates of St Peter....

St Peter says to the nuns "Given you are nuns and have devoted your life to good works you only need to answer a single question each to enter Heaven."

He looks to the first nun and asks "where did the first woman live?"

The first nun quickly replied "the garden of Eden".

St Peter nods approval and looks to the second nun "what was the name of the first woman?"

The second nun pauses for a second and then replies "Eve."

"Well done!" Says St Peter before turning to the third nun and saying "As the Mother Superior you should be able to answer this; what did Eve say to Adam when she first saw him?"

The Mother Superior furrows her brow and says "oh, that's a hard one".

"Correct!" Says St Peter. "You may enter."

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/atheistmil
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15
🚨︎ report
My neighbor asked why i bought a new lawn mower...

..Told him that my old one just wasnting cutting it.

(Neighbor approved)

πŸ‘︎ 175
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoctorVinderman
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when Batman skips church?

Christian Bail

πŸ‘︎ 88
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Oakenshield-
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
🚨︎ report
I don't approve political jokes..

I've seen too many of them get elected.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wolfy189
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24
🚨︎ report
My parents don't approve of my girlfriend because she's a melon.

I asked her to run away with me and get married, but without legs she canteloupe

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Halmagha
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21
🚨︎ report
0.09 out of 0.1 Dentists Approve

Son: Dad why is the statistics in decimal?

Dad: Cause they've got a point.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SlayCC
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17
🚨︎ report
My depressive daughter said she "wants to go out with a bang"

I got her to a hair stylist,but im not approving of this relationship.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ferkeshu
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16
🚨︎ report
My wife has this weird OCD where she arranges the dinner plates by the year they were bought.

It’s an extremely rare dish order.

πŸ‘︎ 284
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27
🚨︎ report
The Beach Boys approve
πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/McLovinMyBacon
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Cheers πŸ₯‚
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cokoblazin
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09
🚨︎ report
I may not be a dad for a while, but I’m getting some good practice in.
πŸ‘︎ 244
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BigPappy09
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Michael Scott would approve
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mason_ja
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Don’t feel bad when your phone changes β€œfucking” to β€œducking”

It’s still fowl language.

πŸ‘︎ 415
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OddLead
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report
The FBI has been hunting me down for sharing their master passkey. It rhymes with approved and it’s spelled

[removed]

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GPyleFan11
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Two melons were in a relationship but the parents did not approve of it.

One suggested secretly running away together to get married, but the suggestion was shot down when the other said, "we cantaloupe!"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalArbiter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
ENTER A NEW PASSWORD β€œchicken” THE PASSWORD REQUIRES A CAPITAL!!!

β€œchickenkiev”

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JackTMJones
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Elemenop
πŸ‘︎ 584
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SharpTechno
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
🚨︎ report
People don’t approve when I run up to them on the street and try making a plaster cast of their faces.

At least that’s the impression that I get.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Today in veterinary class we learned that cows have 4 stomachs to digest the grasses they consume...

It's graze anatomy.

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
🚨︎ report
The Church of England has finally approved of female bishops.

Now British women are finally free to move diagonally.

πŸ‘︎ 144
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Budweiser?

Me sitting in the final interview of AbInbev.

Interviewer: Sorry, You are not selected.

Me: Budweiser?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/YashBanzal
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?

Lukewarm.

Told to me by a coworker who is also a dad. Unfortunately, his son isn't named Luke.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cuff19k
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05
🚨︎ report
Scientists have determined exactly what will spell the end of the world

D.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/el_gregorio
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
As a Dad and Grandpa, I approve this message.
πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Piscator629
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2018
🚨︎ report
What are a communist's favorite units of time?

Hours.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/the_cat_of_war
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call two female lovers spying on the government.

Lesbionage

πŸ‘︎ 333
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Omicra98
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
🚨︎ report
My mailman buddy tells a lot of jokes about undelivered letters.

But no one seems to get them.

πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2018
🚨︎ report
The British parliament finally approved the final draft of the Brexit letter to the European Union.

It’s not EU, it’s me.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What has two butts and kills people?

An assassin

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
🚨︎ report
So I was out at the museum with my daughter today and got the ultimate dad joke in. Employee asks kids "Does anyone know the difference between a Crocodile and an Alligator?"

One will see you later and the other will see you in a while?

Daughter groaned, employee laughed, other dad's nodded approvingly.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Darkbow85
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Two letters fell in love, but their parents wouldn't approve of their marriage.

The solution: EnvELOPE.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bonanza86
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Gordon ramsay approves
πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cbrownathan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2017
🚨︎ report
Mom approved

I came home for a weekend and my mother was catching me up on some current events in the family.

Her: Oh yeah, your cousin has enlisted in the Navy and he's going to training pretty soon.

Me: Wow, how does the family feel about that?

Her: What do you mean?

Me: Well, are they... pause... All aboard with the idea?

both can't contain laughter

Everyone in my family is witty and we all love dad jokes so we always have a good time around the dinner table.

πŸ‘︎ 859
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tatswithgats
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2014
🚨︎ report
What's a Muslim approved joke?

Halol

πŸ‘︎ 92
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Redstoneage
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2016
🚨︎ report
I got the words β€œjacuzzi” and β€œyakuza” confused.

Now I’m in hot water with the Japanese mafia.

πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yoitsrebeca
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I used to know a nun who smoked cigarettes. Her fellow nuns didn't approve

Fortunately, she got out of that habit

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hylanos
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2018
🚨︎ report
a communist joke isnβ€˜t funny until every one gets it. ...
πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AGuyInInternet
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Benjamingur9
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad jokes in real life.

Tonight my wife and I were explaining why my son had to wear pajama bottoms after putting anti-itch cream on his legs, because it kept it from rubbing off on the sheets. β€œBut doesn’t it rub off on the pajamas?” asked my daughter. My wife patiently explained that the cream could then rub back onto his legs.

β€œYes,” I said. β€œIt’s a perpetual lotion machine.”

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jofish22
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2018
🚨︎ report
What’s Gods favorite chord?

Gsus of course.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RageMonster17
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the sickest housewarming gift?

Ebola fruit.

say this one out loud if your stuck.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bodieboo6
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
A Dad joke my Dad approved of.

At dinner with my gf and my parents. She mentions she's never seen Friday the 13th. I said;

"We could always just see the sequel... 'Saturday the 14th'."

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/conormatthews98
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2017
🚨︎ report
I don't mean to make sweeping generalizations...

...but all brooms are pretty much the same.

πŸ‘︎ 694
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fatandsalt
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2018
🚨︎ report
Have you ever been in a boat?

It's yachts of fun!

πŸ‘︎ 44
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JackSpinorex
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What are paramedics favorite gaming console?

Wii U!!! Wii U!! Wii U!!

πŸ‘︎ 101
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OldManSaxon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
🚨︎ report
Usually, my nose smells and my feet run..

... But I haven't showered in a while, so, my nose runs and my feet smells

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/smashedavAvado69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I’m so proud of my son at the beach today

Me: The dog just dug up a bunch of sand into our food.

Son: Well it issss called a sandwich daddy.

Me: smiles and nods with approval

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Sideshow Bob could never get a job at Moe's Tavern

Because of his many past failures with Bart-ending.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xwhy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the chef tell the DJ?

Those are some fresh beets!

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/knotshir
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
When Cheech and Chong broke up, do you think they fought for Joint custody?
πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2018
🚨︎ report
I was passing by my son's bedroom and was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up…

Then, I saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow.

It was addressed, 'Dad'.

With the worst premonition, I opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands:

"Dear, Dad.

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you.

I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy.

She is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing's, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes and because she is so much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Dad.

She's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.

We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.

We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2017
🚨︎ report
What kind of bees make milk?

boobies

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fatcity
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2019
🚨︎ report
A rodent has dreams of winning American Idol. His father says

β€œGopher it son”.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KarateChop231
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I really like jokes about the ocean.

They get my seal of approval.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cringelord123456
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I'd like to tell dad jokes, but I don't have kids.

I'm a faux pa.

πŸ‘︎ 562
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/elokwins
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a gorilla stuck in a ventilation shaft

A Duct-ape. Hahaha any dads laugh in approval?

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ultmtweemanfrsh
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2019
🚨︎ report
The only thing flat earthers have to fear.

Is sphere itself.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/papadump
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2018
🚨︎ report
My boyfriend asked me why I like showering in boiling hot water

I told him a snack tastes better cooked.

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AsAGayGuy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the sailboat start doing drugs?

Pier pressure

πŸ‘︎ 920
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/trappedcouchfarts
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2017
🚨︎ report
My dad sent me this one out of the blue..

A Mexican magician says he'll disappear on the count of three.

Uno... Dos... Poof

He disappeared...

Without a tres.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Apricorns
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2015
🚨︎ report
My Dad's reaction whenever he's given a cup of tea which is understrength

"Urgh, If this was any weaker... it'd be a fortnight"

(Looks around for approval from the family)

πŸ‘︎ 185
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SomewhatEnglish
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2017
🚨︎ report
I may get fired or promoted... not sure...

My boss was complaining she really needed a nap. I told her she should just go take one.

Boss "Oh yeah cause taking a nap right now would be so easy."

Me "Its so easy you can do it with your eyes closed..."

Cue her rolling her eyes and shaking her head. My director peaked his head out and nodded approvingly though. Respect.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/anix421
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2017
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My dad approves my jokes

Me: what do you call a squirrel with no eyes? Dad: don't know, what? Me: blind

uncontrollable laughter from us while my mom just shakes her head.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2014
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Acceptance of all

I highly approve hitchhiking. In fact, I give it a big thumbs up.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ireadit5
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
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What language is only spoken among mailmen?

Parcel tongue

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/smaxwellreddit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2018
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My dad saw my two cousins (both dressed as Elsa) get sticks caught in their dresses

My aunt: β€œoops look like they’re tangled up” My dad: β€œthey’re Frozen not Tangled”

πŸ‘︎ 161
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zomburger257
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2017
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