My wife's an absolute treasure...

By that I mean, you'll need a map and a shovel to find her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
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Why did it take the Roman General 10 tries to find the buried treasure?

Because X marks the spot

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2021
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Why does no one know where the pirate hid their treasure?

Because it's a seacret

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lowlz13
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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Every ancestor inherit treasures to their bloodline

That explains why I have so many hereditary diseases.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
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Why won't the shrimp sell his treasures to the fishes?

Because he is shellfish.

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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Why did the pirate put pants on his treasure?

To hide his booty!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CyberOGa3
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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Pirates of yore would get a treasure chest off a looted vessel and often hear voices coming from the chest saying "yoo hoo!"

It was the booty calls.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
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Yesterday, I was digging in the garden when I found a buried treasure chest!

I ran inside to tell my wife, but then I remembered why I was digging in the garden...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KittenWarlord87
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
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Which pirates dig up the treasure?

Arrrrchaeologists

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GamePlayXtreme
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
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My friend Victoria told me she found secret buried treasure.

But she wouldn't tell me under where.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hensfan85
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
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A pirate keeps his treasure in his pants

That's what holds his booty

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gitrikt
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
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Why wouldn’t the shrimp share his treasure?

Because he was a little shellfish.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cool-kid103
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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Why did the pirate bury a painting of their past relationship, with their treasure?

Ex marks the spot.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrHollowed
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
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I’ve never met this guy but he posts food puns on every single food picture I post and he’s such a treasure. I always look forward to his puns now.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BushyEyes
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2019
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Local businesses name puns, always a treasure
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingBubIII
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
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National Treasure 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShellyT98
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
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Pirates found a trove of treasure and brought four chests aboard...

They put them in the hold and, as it was fair weather, didn't strap them down.

However, as they sailed on, they hit a storm, the ship knocked back and forth.

The captain went down to check on the treasure to find it sliding around the deck.

As a crewman asked how bad it was, the captain replied...

"Booty! Booty! Booty! Booty! Rocking everywhere!"

[This is probably my worst joke yet]

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wolfyfancylads
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
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When the treasure hunter had excavated down six feet, he realized he had made a grave error
πŸ‘︎ 188
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Possum
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2017
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A walking treasure chest full of gold grabs a random man and hands him over to a polite redditor. Redditor says:

Thank you for the stranger kind gold

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hanu_
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
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What's a pirates favorite form of treasure?

A tiYARRa. πŸ‘‘

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thesubordinate
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
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What did they call the movie where Matt Damon looks for thrift store treasures?

Goodwill Hunting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wizard7926
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2018
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How can you tell where the Easter Bunny left his treasure

Eggs marks the spot

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarch3092
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of water keeps you from the treasure?

A Loch

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MerkNZorg
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
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What did the treasure hunt organizer say when people couldn't find the impressionist painter he'd hidden?

That wasn't very cache Monet of you.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Weirfish
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
One man's junk is another man's treasure. If they're gay.
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kindulas
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2017
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How do puppy pirates look for treasure?

They sniff out the booty

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WHARRGARBLLL
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2017
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Airplane (1980) was a treasure trove of dadjokes. imgur.com/QXny0zc
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mybalzich
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2013
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My Dad's comic strip- a treasure trove of Dad jokes

For example: http://robbieshort.com/images/Ug_Sun_EatInTakeOut.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_beat_goes_on
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2017
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I can never go out in public again, but I will treasure this one forever.

After I let one rip with moderate force, my dad responded by bellowing out (in a crowded restaurant) "SPEAK ON SWEET LIPS THAT NEVER TOLD A LIE!". I turned a lovely shade of puce, and made every effort to show that I had never seen this strange man before.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/freedom_or_bust
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2014
🚨︎ report
Why wouldn't the shrimp share his treasure?

http://imgur.com/hJn6KzC

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BrandonPewPew
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2015
🚨︎ report
A confectionary treasure.

Christmas was at Mom's house this year. She has to buy at least 10 lbs of sugar to make all the treats and candy that everyone wants. She has all of the candy and pies and things on the counter in the dinning room. As family members arrived and everyone made their way passed the dinning room my niece(14) came in.

Her: You've been standing in here for a while.

Me: Yup, it's the sweetest spot in the house.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/123_Syzygy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2016
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This is a treasure trove of dad jokes huffingtonpost.com/2013/0…
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NGA100
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2013
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Why wouldn't the shrimp share his treasures?

Because it was shellfish

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NDB05_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Why wouldn’t the shrimp share his treasure?

Because he was a little shellfish.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Why wouldn't the shrimp share his treasure?

Because he was a little shellfish!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rohi0109
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2017
🚨︎ report

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