I am suspicious that my wife is secretly adding glue to my weapons collection...
She denies it, but I'm sticking to my guns.
π︎ 63
π
︎ May 19 2021
I asked Rick Astley if I can borrow his Disney movie collection.
He told me "You can borrow any movie in my collection but I'm never gonna give you Up."
π︎ 19
π
︎ May 09 2021
Rick Astley will let you borrow any DVD from his Pixar collection, EXCEPT one
He's never gonna give you "Up"
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 12 2021
Notable Cats Enamel Pin Collection
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 08 2021
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge asks her. "First offender?"
She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!"
π︎ 38
π
︎ May 11 2021
I think my wife is covering my rifle collection with glue.
She's denying it, but I'm sticking to my guns.
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Jan 27 2021
I want to be buried with my record collection.
That would be my vinyl resting place.
π︎ 25
π
︎ Apr 29 2021
The content of a person's audiobook collection...
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 03 2021
What does Reese Witherspoon call her gun collection?
π︎ 470
π
︎ Feb 09 2021
I own a pristine collection of candy canes...
they're all in mint condition!
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 22 2021
A collection of physical dadjokes
A collection of physical dad-jokes (click the link).
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 14 2021
I don't understand why my friends hate my lava lamp collection...
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 31 2021
Rick Astley has a massive movie collection and will let you borrow all but one
Heβs never going to give you up His movie collection
π︎ 4
π
︎ Mar 23 2021
My collection of irreplaceable French movies was stolen.
π︎ 29
π
︎ Feb 15 2021
Pokemon cards? Yeah i've got a small collection.
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Jun 17 2020
Rick Astley doesn't mind giving away his Disney movies collection...
But he's still never gonna give you Up. Especially remastered in 4k.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Feb 18 2021
My record collection includes Bruce Springsteen, John Cougar Mellencamp, and Tom Petty. Itβs almost a full Heartland Rock set...
π︎ 12
π
︎ Jan 18 2021
I inherited my dad's collection of shallow flat receptacles with a raised edge, used for carrying, holding, or displaying articles.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Feb 08 2021
My son told me he wanted to start a change collection.
I told him that makes a lot of cents.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 24 2021
Did you hear about the dad who has the world's largest candy cane collection?
They're all in mint condition.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Dec 06 2020
My gf made me give away my collection of dead batteries
π︎ 27
π
︎ Nov 04 2020
My wife hates my collection of old snake skins.
So I have to keep them in the shed.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 08 2020
I need a collection of these
π︎ 3k
π
︎ Dec 20 2019
I considered converting my wardrobe to house my board game collection, but was worried about losing clothing space.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Sep 18 2020
My private pun collection
π︎ 351
π
︎ Feb 29 2020
A collection of the greatest
π︎ 46
π
︎ Mar 23 2020
People ask why I have a collection of large scissors.
I tell them it is for the shear fun of it
π︎ 15
π
︎ Jul 03 2020
What do you call a collection of bones made out of kitchenware?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 23 2020
I donβt understand why the thief who stole my currency collection took all the bills but left all the coins.
It was a cents-less crime.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Jul 17 2020
I can't believe my wife wanted me to get rid of my silt collection!
It's like she doesn't understand the sedimental value!
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jul 14 2020
My son took his jar collection way too far
When I came home from work I thought the house was robbed because the door was ajar
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
My friend showed me his huge comic book collection...
π︎ 70
π
︎ Mar 25 2020
You know, if you have seen one collection of retail outlets under one roof, you have seen a mall.
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jan 10 2020
I'm looking to sell my toothpaste collection.
Don't worry, they're all in mint condition.
π︎ 33
π
︎ Jan 21 2020
A woman was on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection
the judge says: "First offender" The woman replies: "No, first a Gibson, the a Fender"
π︎ 17
π
︎ Dec 16 2020
A woman is on trial for beating up a unfaithful rockstar husband with his guitar collection
The judge asked her, βfirst offenderβ
βNo,β she says βfirst a Gibson then a Fender
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 17 2020
I will give you my entire Pixar collection
But I am never gonna give you Up
π︎ 41
π
︎ Jun 07 2020
I am suspicious that my wife is secretly adding glue to my weapons collection.
She denies it, but Iβm sticking to my guns.
π︎ 9k
π
︎ May 03 2019
I think my wife is putting glue on my antique weapons collection.
Of course she denies it, but I'm sticking to my guns.
π︎ 49
π
︎ Aug 19 2020
I think my wife is secretly putting glue on my antique weapon collection.
She denies it, but Iβm sticking to my guns.
π︎ 12k
π
︎ Mar 09 2019
Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Disney collection...
Except for the movie Up. He's never gonna give you Up.
π︎ 71
π
︎ Apr 09 2020
Why should you never ask Rick Astley to borrow his Pixar collection?
Because heβs never gonna give you βUp.β
π︎ 29
π
︎ May 19 2020
I am convinced that my wife is secretly adding glue to my weapons collection.
She keeps denying it, but Iβm sticking to my guns.
π︎ 395
π
︎ Nov 04 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection...
The judge asks, βFirst offender?β The wife replies, βNo, first a Gibson, then a Fender.β
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Jan 21 2019
Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection, except for one.
Heβs never gonna give you Up.
π︎ 30
π
︎ Mar 24 2020
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
The judge asksΒ her, "First offender?β She says, βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!"
π︎ 209
π
︎ Aug 30 2019
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