A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated." And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers, "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun and their wings seeming like flames?"
"Yes, my master, I have."
"And a waterfall, spilling mightly over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?"
"Yes, my master, I have witnessed it."
"And the moon, when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?"
"Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvelous phenomenon."
"That is the problem. You keep watching all this shit instead of training."
I stayed up all night wondering where the sun was,
2 Astronauts landed on the Sun
Astronaut 1 : ItssofuckinghotcanIgetabeeraroundhere?
Astronaut 2 : Thereisnospacebar.
Well.. We made another trip around the sun.
But it's the earth's rotation that really makes my day.
What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises?
NASA put a watch around a potted plant and sent it on a rocket to the sun. I said to my Daughter, "don't worry, it will be ok.."
"a watched pot never boils"
My friend today is intentionally staring at the sun to cause eye damage.
Look on the bright side, today will be the last time he sees 2020....
Why didn't the sun go to college?
It already has like a million degrees!
Somebody should come up with a name for when the sun goes down
I’m gonna call it a night
Honey, you are the sun that lights my sky.
I'm glad you're there, but god I hate looking at you.
I squint at the sun because its bright...
......but, I squint at some coworkers, because they aren't.
Beer is like the sun...
It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.
What did the Sun say to the Moon when it came home after it’s curfew?
“Have you been out all night?”
Johnny Depp has lost his case against The Sun newspaper even with evidences
Hard to win if Amber is Heard and Johnny is not
What does Apollo, god of the sun, do when his sideburns get too long?
What’s hotter than the sun?
My daughter. Oh wait, I thought this was r/stepdadjokes
Um, never mind.
Whatever you do, don't look at the sun through a colander...
You will strain your eyes
Remember, the sun isn't chicken.
I was just chillin by the pool on the 4th of July with my 11 yr old. I told him I got a little Sun...
And then you had a growth spurt.
It took him a few minutes...
Know the difference between sun and no sun?
You really should. Its night and day
The sun came up twice today
I once knew a guy that liked to bask in the sun. He touched my circle of friends but did not enter it...
How does the moon give the sun a great hairdo?
I had a friend who started crying and said he somehow once saw the sun rising in the west instead of the east.
He thought it was upsetting.
After a long and terrible Autumn, the Sun was shining once again and the trees were finally put at ease.
Three fruits decided to have a dragrace match. The Lemon prepared by practcing driving skills, the orange by studying the appropriate tecniques, the grape by relaxing in the sun. Who won?
The grape. He was the only one who went raisin.
What happens when you give the sun a gun?
It becomes a shooting star.
My wife yelled, “Hey, the sun’s coming out!” So I wore my shorts and flip flops and came downstairs.
Found my son holding hand with his boyfriend.
I blow into a dog whistle every time I see the sun setting
It's always nice to end the day on a high note
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went...
I stayed up all night, wondering where the sun went.
And then it dawned on me.
What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.
I once stayed up all night trying to figure out where the Sun went
The sun is hot, and bright... I look up to the sun. :)
What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up?
I was up all night wondering where the sun went
Why did the sun never go to college?
It already has thousands of degrees.
I spent all night wondering where the sun went...
What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up?
I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went after it set.
Bread is a lot like the sun
It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist
Bread is like the sun
it rises in the yeast, and sets in the waist
I once stayed up all night trying to figure out where the sun went
Bread is a lot like the sun
It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist
I was up all night, wondering where the sun went
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