Did you know what did the Grrman Bread said to another German Bread after tapping on his shoulder ?
Gluten Tag.
edit : i fucked up the title
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︎ Jul 28 2020
What do you call Bill Clinton's VP programmatically tapping his foot and clapping his hands?
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︎ May 02 2020
A teenage girl came across an elderly man sitting next to his radio, tapping his cane to a Lil Wayne song.
"Wow! I didn't think you'd like rap music!"
"I didn't, either," the old man replied. "It all started after my hip op".
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︎ Jun 18 2020
I once saw a little guy with a red pointy hat riding the D.C. subway, listening to some music, tapping his toes perfectly in time with the beat
He was the greatest Metro Gnome ever.
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︎ Apr 16 2020
Al Gore was tapping his foot impatiently while waiting for the elevator to arrive. The guy next to him said "Nice Algorithm!"
Al Gore responded: Al Gore take the stairs.
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︎ Sep 18 2019
This weekend I will absolutely kick my habit of tapping on dead trees
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︎ Feb 01 2019
My wife was madly tapping at her phone, looks up in frustration, and says "My sound isn't working".
To which I reply "I can hear you just fine".
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︎ Oct 17 2017
To all ya'll in Texas without tap water
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︎ Feb 21 2021
tap on the screen
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︎ Jan 22 2021
Iβve always wanted to tap my neighborsβ maple tree, but he wouldnβt give me permission.
Think I could do it syruptitiously?
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︎ Feb 28 2021
Never use tap water as a perfume.
It doesn't make any scents.
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︎ Mar 04 2021
Tap on the screen
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︎ Nov 19 2020
I studied Morse code so I could tap out dad jokes with my ham radio, but I only learned half of the code.
So I'm no expert at it, just a pundit.
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︎ Feb 15 2021
Barse... *taps mic "Is this thing on?"
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︎ Nov 10 2020
I was a tap dancer
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︎ Nov 18 2020
A man walks in to a bar. On the bar is a duck tap dancing on a biscuit tin.
He is amazed and wants to buy the duck.
The man refuses at first but eventually agreed.
As the man walks out of the bar the now owner of the duck shouts.
Excuse me how do i stop the duck tap dancing.
Simple says the man lift up the tin and blow out the candle......
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︎ Oct 07 2020
Double tap
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︎ Jul 25 2020
Tap on this picture.
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︎ Jun 19 2020
A guy says he taught his dog Morse code. "Aye right Show me." Mate says. Guy turns to dog and asks "who's been a good boy then?" Dog uses paw on ground. Tap tap pause tap long pause tap pause tap pause tap long pause tap pause tap pause tap long pause tap tap tap pause tap. "what he say?" Mate asks
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︎ Dec 06 2019
Double tap
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︎ Sep 09 2020
Woke up this morning to a tap on my door
That plumber has some sense of humour
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︎ Aug 12 2020
I think my sink is a little clogged
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︎ Nov 10 2020
Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing?
He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.
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︎ Jun 27 2020
I made up a joke about the sound a tap makes when you turn it on full blast, but no one got it.
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︎ Sep 08 2020
Tappy tap
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︎ Dec 15 2019
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill
So I sent him a "get well soon" card
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︎ Sep 07 2020
There were a group of elderly people say with their phones.
They repeatedly tapped their screens... Read more
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︎ Feb 25 2021
*tap tap* Mic check
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︎ Sep 19 2019
Tap on the screen.
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︎ Oct 15 2019
I like this
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︎ Nov 16 2020
Tap on the screen...
Tap on the screen...
I hope this is allowed here...π
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︎ Apr 23 2020
There were 2 monkeys sitting in the bath...
One says to the other: 'oooooo eeeeee oooooo aaaaa'
The other says: 'put the cold tap on then!'
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︎ Feb 21 2021
I went to America once and tried to turn on a tap. It was a bit stiff though...
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︎ Jun 05 2020
Tap this for a little known fact!
α΄·βΏα΅Κ·βΏ αΆ α΅αΆα΅
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︎ Jun 21 2019
Itβs a tap
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︎ Aug 15 2019
I need to tap into this power
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︎ Nov 28 2019
My girlfriend can't stand the tap water. She says it tastes too metallic.
I think she just has a strong sense of iron-y.
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︎ Dec 10 2019
Woke up this morning to a tap on the door
I thought, that's a funny place to put a tap.
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︎ Mar 26 2020
I was alone in the bath
Imagine my surprise when I felt a tap on my shoulder!
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︎ Oct 05 2020
Double tap on your screen.
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︎ May 26 2017
I used to be pretty nifty tap dancer...
Until I fell into the sink (ie the basin for the yanks).
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︎ Dec 02 2019
Tap
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︎ Sep 28 2019
What do you call a dinosaur that explodes?
Well I don't know but the Dinomite I guess
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︎ Mar 18 2020
Tap in the picture
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︎ Aug 10 2019
Idk if anyone has posted this before
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︎ Aug 03 2020
What should you do if there's a sink at your door?
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︎ Dec 15 2020
There was a tap on the door this morning.
My plumber's got a weird sense of humour.
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︎ May 15 2020
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