Ahh, te punnage is strong. (Found on r/memes)
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Harrypolly_net
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
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What starts with an E and ends with an E, but often only has one letter?
๐Ÿ‘︎ 11k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/sacca7
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 31 2017
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Why don't cows wear flip flops?

They lactose.

Edit test.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/derawin07
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 25 2018
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โ€œWhat day is today, Adam?โ€

โ€œFor the last time, itโ€™s Christmas, Eve.โ€

Edit: Thanks for so much love. Merry Xmas!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2017
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True story: We weโ€™re driving in the car today when my five year old found an umbrella and opened it...

My wife yelled at him to close it immediately, as it wasnโ€™t safe in a moving vehicle. I told her it wasnโ€™t a big deal since both of our vehicles have umbrella insurance.

The kids didnโ€™t get it but it elicited a nice groan from the wife, so Iโ€™m pretty sure it counts.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/The1hangingchad
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 29 2018
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Apparently I'm culturally insensitive

Me eating Girl Scout Cookies:
"You guys can call me Te Kฤ. Cuz I destroyed these Samoas."
Wife: "Go away... "

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Furryraptorcock
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
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Whatโ€™s the most accurate name for an Asian professor?

Te Ching

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SpaceCA18DET
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 24 2018
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Chemistry Puns

Funny collection of chemistry puns

What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver? SWAG


Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? Heโ€™s 0K now.


What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.


How do Sulfur and Oxygen communicate? A sulfone


What do you call Iron blowing in the wind? Febreeze.


Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium the healing elements? Because if you canโ€™t helium or curium, you barium!


Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends argon.


Why did the acid go to the gym? To become a buffer solution!


Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!


Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak? Because itโ€™s in the ground state.


How many moles are in a guacamole? Avocadoโ€™s number.


If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.


What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.


Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.


What element is a girlโ€™s future best friend? Carbon.


I had to make these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.


Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na


Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!


Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? Heโ€™s 0K now.


What do you do with a dead chemists? Barium


What animal is made up of calcium, nickel and neon? A CaNiNe


What did the chemist snack on during lunch? A โ€˜gramโ€™ cracker.


What would you call a clown in jail? Silicon (Silly Con)


What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel and iron? A KNiFe.


How did carbon propose to Hydrogen? With a โ€œcarbonkneelโ€


What did one titration tell the other? Letโ€™s meet at the endpoint.


How can you spot a chemist in the restroom? They wash their hands before they go.


Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.


Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na


Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia? Because itโ€™s basic material.


Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just could not put it down


Why do chemistry professor like to

... keep reading on reddit โžก

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Punsville
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 30 2017
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What are your favourite type of witches?

Mine are sand-witches

I'll walk myself out.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/KiRo88TheMLGNoob
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 14 2016
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My friend claimed he was talking to his friend through a piece of bread.

He calls it the "te-loaf-one".

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Pokefan993
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 29 2015
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What do you call Al Gore dancing?

An Al-Gore-Rythem

I actually thought of this in the shower and wondered if I should post it to /r/showerthoughts.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DISREPUTABLE
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 05 2017
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Made a french dadjoke with my girlfriend.

French here, so the joke is in french, maybe some will still like it.

Ma copine me dit un soir: "oh merde, รงa m'endors !"

J'ai directement rรฉpondu: "sinon tu peux faire un truc qui te Liechtenstein, ou qui te Monaco.."

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๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 23 2015
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The worst case scenario
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Sigfin
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 19 2016
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Soybeans..

Hola, beans! Soy te padre!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SurprisedPotato
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 26 2016
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Found on twitter.

http://imgur.com/nfmXzTE

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/samsweetmilk
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 14 2014
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My coworker got a good one in last night

The the kitchen I work in, two of the cooks normally have the local Latino top 40 station on the radio. Last night, a bachata song was playing on the radio, when one of my coworkers asked one of the cooks, Omar, about it. I noticed he had a huge grin on his face. I knew something was up.

Coworker: "Hey Omar, what is this stuff on the radio?"

Omar: "It's bachata, te gustas? [do you like it?]"

Coworker: "Oh yeah guey, I love horchata."

Omar then gives my coworker the much needed groan, while I laugh my ass off.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Etrex
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 23 2014
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