Switching things up a bit, today.
Going to sit on the television and watch the recliner
so anyway im switching my major to marketing...
just a few hours ago my brother was talking about buying cinnamon rolls from his english teacher who bakes and sells it on instagram as a side hustle and i said IF SHES AN ENGLISH TEACHER SHE SHOULD CALL THEM SYNONYM ROLLS and honestly im super proud
So Apple is switching to ARM-SoCs...
... I think they're taking a huge RISC.
If you’re switching from liquid to bar soap, be careful...
I’m thinking of switching my major to geology.
I think I’d do well because I keep discovering a new rock bottom.
A lot of YouTube channels are switching to an 18:9 aspect ratio
Personally I find it two wide.
The coach asked his quarterback to consider switching positions after an interception
What did the gym goer say to their trainer when asked if they'd consider switching to a protein powder supplement?
What would happen if the USA switched from Pounds to Kilograms?
There would be mass confusion
I was at a hotel and asked the front desk to switch my pillow out with one filled with feathers...
I switched labels in my wife's spice cabinet.
She hasn't noticed, but the thyme is cumin.
A man who had just died was delivered to the mortuary wearing a beautiful black suit.
The mortician asked the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out the man looks good in the black suit he’s already wearing. The widow however said she thought her husband always looked his best in blue, and she would really like him in a blue suit. She then hands the mortician a blank cheque and says “I don’t care how much it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.” The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe. Remarkably, the suit fit him perfectly. She says to the mortician, “whatever this costs I’m very satisfied, you did an excellent job and I’m incredibly grateful. How much did you spend?” To her astonishment the mortician presents her with her blank cheque, and he says “there’s no charge.” Shocked she replies “no really, I feel like i must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit.” “Honestly ma’am”, the mortician says, “it costs nothing, you see a diseased gentleman about your husbands size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday. He was wearing an attractive blue suit. So I asked his wife if she minded if her husband went to the grave wearing black. She had said it made no difference so long as he looked nice. So from that point on it was really just a matter of switching the heads.”
Why won’t Americans switch from pounds to kilos?
It would cause mass confusion
What is the dish that likes using the light switch?
A big light switch is a major turn-on
Switched my laptop screen to 4k just now...
It's my New Year's resolution.
I recently switched from using mayonnaise to using butter for making grilled cheese sandwiches. My wife said she liked them more with the butter, but kindly asked me if it was more work this way?
I answered: "It is, but only margarinely more."
Note: this really happened.
I got tired of flipping the little switch on my rear view mirror to dim the headlights.
So I removed the whole mirror.
I haven’t looked back since.
I had a girlfriend years ago that had a passion for light switches
It was an on/off relationship
This time of year we switch out our old decorative squash for a new one -
It's the traditional changing of the gourd.
My wife dared doubt my craftsmanship when I was changing over the light switch.
Haha, she's in for a shock
germans:" i thought we were a team, why did you switch sides?" italians:"
Why did the guy who voted for Trump in 2016 switch sides this time?
Because hindsight is 2020.
I’ve decided to switch jobs from gardener to breast enlargements surgeon.
It was easy, both are basically implants.
A $9.99. Nintendo Switch! If it's too good to be true, it probably is...
September, October, November, and December should have been the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th month.
Whoever screwed this up—- I hope he got stabbed.
I recently switched all the labels on my wife’s spices…
She hasn’t realized it yet, but the Thyme is Cumin.
Why did the baker switch to dog shaped rolls?
He always wanted a purebred.
I’ve recently switched all the labels on my wife’s spice rack.
She doesn’t know yet. But the thyme is cumin.
I switched out my bed for a trampoline
Let me tell you that my wife hit the roof when she found out.
Geese fly in a V-formation for aerodynamics, and when the lead goose gets tired he switches out his position. But one side of the V is almost always longer than the other. Do you know why?
4 year old daughter gave me her Nintendo switch to charge..
I put it on the ground and backed up. I slowly raised my arm and yelled "chaaaaaarrrrggggeeee" , then I ran at it.
Have you ever seen a light switch before?
It's not pretty, they get very angry.
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
Don’t get mad at the hallway light switch that keeps shocking you
It’s just reminding you of your potential.
My switch was too heavy, so I got a lighter one
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight
There would be mass confusion.
What would happen if America switched from using pounds to kilograms as a unit a measure?
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight
There would be mass confusion
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight
There would be a mass confusion
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms over night
There would be MASS confusion
Imagine if America switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.
There'd be mass confusion.
I switched all the labels on my wife's spices.
I'm not in trouble yet, but the thyme is cumin.
What would happen if americans switched to kilograms overnight?
I recently switched all the labels on my wife's spice rack....
She hasn't realized it yet, but the thyme is cumin.
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.
There would be a mass confusion
I recently switched all the labels on my wife’s spice rack.
She hasn’t realized it yet, but the thyme is cumin...
If Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight, there would be mass confusion
I got tired of flipping the little switch on my rear view mirror to dim the headlights.
So I removed the whole mirror.
I haven’t looked back since.
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