I am a butcher by trade & yesterday I accidently backed into the meat grinder
I got a little behind in my work
š︎ 24
š
︎ Jan 17 2021
Since the very beginning, man has been panning for gold and using it as trade.
Our ancestors called it the prime-ore-deal soup
š︎ 2
š
︎ Dec 20 2020
I can't believe I was able to trade a piece of fruit for a measuring device.
š︎ 8
š
︎ Dec 02 2020
The twin towers of New York World Trade Center are like genders.
There used to be two, but now they are just a sensitive topic.
Also: The real 9/11 pays respect! The world remembers 9/11.
š︎ 2
š
︎ Nov 09 2020
What kind of photos would chickens trade on tinder?
š︎ 3
š
︎ Oct 19 2020
Told my wife when she turns 40, I was gonna have to trade her in on 2, 20's
She said that I wasn't wired for it.....
š︎ 4
š
︎ Sep 05 2020
I got banned from the buy sell trade group for this but it was worth it.
imgur.com/jrZ6LX8
š︎ 410
š
︎ Mar 29 2020
What do you call it when a woman trades sex for a tattoo?
š︎ 25
š
︎ May 02 2020
I tried to trade a deer for fireworks
I want the best bang for my buck
š︎ 222
š
︎ Apr 23 2020
A door to door salesman knocked on my door and before I could say anything he said, "A person's regular occupation, profession, or trade..."
Just from the first sentence, I knew he meant business.
š︎ 2
š
︎ Jul 09 2020
Why is the head sister usually known as a jack-of-all-trades?
Because she's a master of nun.
š︎ 10
š
︎ Apr 20 2020
Trade
I got a gun for my wife....................
It was a GOOD trade!!!
š︎ 6
š
︎ Apr 21 2020
Why did Sauron trade in his sports car for a sedan?
š︎ 17
š
︎ Mar 28 2020
My grandparents disowned me after I joined the trades as a brick-layer.
They eventually reconciled after I got a promotion, but still consider me as a meh-son.
š︎ 5
š
︎ Mar 10 2020
Best trade ever
š︎ 3k
š
︎ Apr 11 2018
I noticed that 80% of woodworkers have bad backs from their trade.
So Iām starting a lumbar support group.
š︎ 10
š
︎ Jan 25 2020
Did you hear about the woman who was approaching men wanting to trade sex for a spaghetti dinner?
She was arrested for pasta-tution
š︎ 16
š
︎ Dec 03 2019
What kind of boat do sailors learn their trade on?
š︎ 22
š
︎ May 14 2019
Seems like a good trade
š︎ 21
š
︎ Feb 14 2019
What's the trade name of a robot nun?
š︎ 12
š
︎ Aug 03 2019
What do you call a person who trades rubber tyres for a living?
š︎ 4
š
︎ Aug 21 2019
As a US citizen, seeing all of these trade wars occuring with our country has me tarrified.
š︎ 35
š
︎ Jun 30 2018
What do you call a gathering of T-Rex to share their art and trade good?
š︎ 3
š
︎ May 18 2019
A customer called today looking for "organic, vegan, free-trade personal lubricant"
I've finally found a way to beat my meat cruelty free.
š︎ 10
š
︎ Dec 21 2018
Why has it always been One Week since Trump threatened a trade war?
Because he's playing chicken with China, the Chinese chicken.
š︎ 9
š
︎ Apr 08 2018
Hitting a deer with your car is always an unfair trade.
You're out the cost of the insurance deductible, but nature is only out a buck.
š︎ 11
š
︎ Sep 04 2018
Before money people used to trade things like venison.
A house cost twenty bucks.
š︎ 10
š
︎ Feb 18 2018
How did the economist describe the trade wars?
š︎ 5
š
︎ Jul 12 2018
When I trade four quarters for a paper dollar
my $1 bill is the ex-change
š︎ 4
š
︎ Apr 20 2018
I'm a little low on money at the moment to buy Injustice 2. I plan on trading games back to GameStop even though I will get next to nothing for it. I'll even trade in my original Injustice game for it...
that's what I call poetic injustice.
š︎ 7
š
︎ May 15 2017
Bakers only trade bread recipes...
on a knead-to-know basis.
š︎ 11
š
︎ Jan 21 2017
How would you describe the worst trade the Boston Red Sox ever made
š︎ 3
š
︎ Apr 20 2017
Bring your kids to work day today. So I brought my buoys. Guess I'll show them the ropes of the trade
imgur.com/u1UpGr3
š︎ 67
š
︎ Mar 27 2015
Did you hear that Egyptian cotton is now mostly fair trade?
Apparently they're planting it in fair rows.
Edit: Several thousand tons of mummified animals have been used as fertiliser.
š︎ 6
š
︎ Jul 28 2017
Where Do Cows Trade Milk?
The Moo York Stock Exchange
š︎ 11
š
︎ Mar 10 2017
I've been practicing the Dadjoke trade on my girlfriend
So my girlfriend was doing some readings from her law textbook, and I was looking over her shoulder reading the thrilling book.
Me: "WHO's the World Health Organisation."
Her: "Ha. Ha."
š︎ 3
š
︎ Mar 07 2014
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