What starts with an β€œO” and ends with β€œnions” and sometimes make you cry?

Opinions

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sayan_dutta7
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
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In Sweden, footraces sometimes start a short distance away from the country’s eastern border.

The winner is the first person to cross the Finnish line.

πŸ‘︎ 229
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MGreenMN
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
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I'm going to start a yacht building business in my attic

Sails should go through the roof

πŸ‘︎ 192
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joelthomastr
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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What starts with T, ends with T, and is full of T?

Teapot

πŸ‘︎ 12k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lvrcerosis
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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There’s two old men sitting on their front porch when a dog comes up and starts licking it’s junk

One of the old men goes, man I wish I could do that.

The other says, you can’t do that. That dog’ll bite you.

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/frozeneskimo02
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
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I'm gonna start a German themed donut shop.

Any investors interested in backing Gluten Morgen?

Pretty proud of that one.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/samjtrost
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
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What starts with an "e" and ends with an "e" with a letter in it?

Envolope

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kkshitij4_exe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
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I feel strong peel pressure when all my friends start eating bananas.
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/deoxys14
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2021
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I havent read a book in ages. So i decided to start with a book of how clocks work.

It was about time!!

πŸ‘︎ 106
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πŸ‘€︎ u/robconone
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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For the past five years, I’ve said that i’m going to start jogging, but I never have

It’s starting to become a running joke at this point

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/owarner40
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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not to start any debate but..blue is cool.
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lockmessedup998
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2021
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What is the only 4 letter word sport that starts with a 'T'?

Golf.

πŸ‘︎ 756
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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A mailman starts his first day on the job in Amsterdam.

He has to get to the other side of the canal but can't seem to find a bridge. On the other side he sees someone walking his dog. How do I get to the opposite side? He shouts. You already are the man responds.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lorenboy2001
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
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I wanted to start writing music again, so I spent $500 on a new keyboard.

It's a half-a-grand piano.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clearlystyle
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
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I've decided to start storing everything in the Cloud, and it's a lot easier than you'd think

Although I'm still not sure how exactly I'm supposed to get anything back down... I guess I'll just have to wait until the balloons pop to use my TV again.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpartansATTACK
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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Every day, my teacher reads a joke from Reddit to start the class, but today she is absent.

So instead, a subreddit.

πŸ‘︎ 129
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrFitBit
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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If I start to identify as an invisible man, does that make me a....

...trans-parent?

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/XIIXOO
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
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Since the start of the pandemic, my friend the baker shut down his bakery and happily idles the day away...

He always liked loafing around.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2021
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I'm trying to start up my own business, recycling discarded chewing gum.

Just need help getting it off the ground.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
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What do you say when your stationary bin starts moving?

Bingo!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theRiverknows86
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2021
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Is it o.k. to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school...

....or, am I a really bad teacher ?

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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My son told me he wanted to start a change collection.

I told him that makes a lot of cents.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/racismisgay
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
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And just like that, 2020 won. Better start trainimg for the rematch in 12 months...it will be 2020 two.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/squarepeg101
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
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What is the fruit that is green on the outside and red with black seeds on the inside, the name start with an H

Half a watermelon

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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What starts with a W and ends with a T.

It does, I swear.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OliPark
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
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Since the start of the Covid outbreak I own the quietest bar in the land....

Bar none.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
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My son and I went camping yesterday and when he asked me how to start a campfire, I explained, "You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together, but make sure they’re the same..."

"Then you’ll have a match."

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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All the hair dressers all closed due to covid, so I start looking to the black market for a haircut

But I heard they were under cutting everyone

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/B0B0oo7
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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I really ought to start losing weight...

But, I've got too much on my plate at the moment.

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
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A good romance starts with a good friendship

And a bad romance starts with β€œra ra ah ah ah, ro ma, ro ma ma ga ga, ooh la la”

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Charley_Benson
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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Before I start, I need to see if this thing works.

"Everyone named Michael stand up." Assorted people stand up "And that concludes the mike check."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
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We Tried Getting Americans to Start Measuring Weight in Kilograms Instead of Pounds

But they were very cagey about it.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/adhoc42
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
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Why did the Russians car not start?

It kept Stalin.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RSGaming0416
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
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Why does β€œsecretary” start with secret?

Because of all their business affairs

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/linknt01
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
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Want to start a Hula band that covers music by Poison.

Gonna call it Poi, Son.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jarofcomics77
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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Heard the song "Don't Start Now" on the radio.

Told my kids: "If I have to listen to this song one more time, I am going to Dua Lipa off the roof".

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lucno
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
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my transgender son wanted to start on T....

so I gave him tea.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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I’m thinking of a word. Starts with P and doesn’t have an ending

it’s Pi

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MINECRAFT-BEE7
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
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How does a vampire start a letter?

Tomb it may concern …

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlankPhotos
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
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What starts with F and rhymes with yuck?

Fire Truck

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/noxidexr
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
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The US Navy will start to equip all their subs with emotional support dogs. After a lot study, they decided on Dachshunds...

...they will be subma-weiners.

πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
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I have a knock-knock joke, but you have to start it...

Knock-knock.

>!Who's there?!<

Edit: my son told me this. I was confused at why I had to start it and then cracked up when he said β€œwho’s there?”

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BusyPooping
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
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Feeling ugly? Work at a bee sanctuary and start helping the world! Everyone will think you are beautiful for that

Because beauty is in the eye of the beeholder

πŸ‘︎ 90
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoMoreTerritory
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
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Every day, my teacher starts her class by reading a joke from r/dadjokes, but today she is absent.

So today, a subreddit.

πŸ‘︎ 25k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
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What starts with 'O' and ends with 'nions' and sometimes make you cry?

Opinions.

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1963Jan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
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