What starts with an βOβ and ends with βnionsβ and sometimes make you cry?
π︎ 119
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︎ Feb 14 2021
In Sweden, footraces sometimes start a short distance away from the countryβs eastern border.
The winner is the first person to cross the Finnish line.
π︎ 229
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︎ Feb 11 2021
I'm going to start a yacht building business in my attic
Sails should go through the roof
π︎ 192
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︎ Jan 28 2021
What starts with T, ends with T, and is full of T?
π︎ 12k
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︎ Sep 27 2020
Thereβs two old men sitting on their front porch when a dog comes up and starts licking itβs junk
One of the old men goes, man I wish I could do that.
The other says, you canβt do that. That dogβll bite you.
π︎ 58
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︎ Jan 31 2021
I'm gonna start a German themed donut shop.
Any investors interested in backing Gluten Morgen?
Pretty proud of that one.
π︎ 14
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︎ Jan 25 2021
What starts with an "e" and ends with an "e" with a letter in it?
π︎ 16
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︎ Jan 20 2021
I feel strong peel pressure when all my friends start eating bananas.
π︎ 6
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︎ Feb 05 2021
I havent read a book in ages. So i decided to start with a book of how clocks work.
π︎ 106
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︎ Jan 08 2021
For the past five years, Iβve said that iβm going to start jogging, but I never have
Itβs starting to become a running joke at this point
π︎ 54
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︎ Jan 28 2021
not to start any debate but..blue is cool.
π︎ 4
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︎ Jan 17 2021
What is the only 4 letter word sport that starts with a 'T'?
π︎ 756
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︎ Oct 29 2020
A mailman starts his first day on the job in Amsterdam.
He has to get to the other side of the canal but can't seem to find a bridge. On the other side he sees someone walking his dog. How do I get to the opposite side? He shouts. You already are the man responds.
π︎ 10
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︎ Feb 07 2021
I wanted to start writing music again, so I spent $500 on a new keyboard.
It's a half-a-grand piano.
π︎ 9
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︎ Feb 07 2021
I've decided to start storing everything in the Cloud, and it's a lot easier than you'd think
Although I'm still not sure how exactly I'm supposed to get anything back down... I guess I'll just have to wait until the balloons pop to use my TV again.
π︎ 5
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︎ Feb 10 2021
Every day, my teacher reads a joke from Reddit to start the class, but today she is absent.
π︎ 129
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︎ Dec 14 2020
If I start to identify as an invisible man, does that make me a....
π︎ 7
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︎ Feb 03 2021
Since the start of the pandemic, my friend the baker shut down his bakery and happily idles the day away...
He always liked loafing around.
π︎ 3
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︎ Feb 08 2021
I'm trying to start up my own business, recycling discarded chewing gum.
Just need help getting it off the ground.
π︎ 15
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︎ Jan 02 2021
What do you say when your stationary bin starts moving?
π︎ 5
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︎ Feb 04 2021
Is it o.k. to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school...
....or, am I a really bad teacher ?
π︎ 65
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︎ Dec 15 2020
My son told me he wanted to start a change collection.
I told him that makes a lot of cents.
π︎ 6
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︎ Jan 24 2021
And just like that, 2020 won. Better start trainimg for the rematch in 12 months...it will be 2020 two.
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 01 2021
What is the fruit that is green on the outside and red with black seeds on the inside, the name start with an H
π︎ 11
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︎ Jan 06 2021
What starts with a W and ends with a T.
π︎ 9k
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︎ Jul 04 2020
Since the start of the Covid outbreak I own the quietest bar in the land....
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 18 2021
My son and I went camping yesterday and when he asked me how to start a campfire, I explained, "You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together, but make sure theyβre the same..."
"Then youβll have a match."
π︎ 25
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︎ Jan 06 2021
All the hair dressers all closed due to covid, so I start looking to the black market for a haircut
But I heard they were under cutting everyone
π︎ 7
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︎ Jan 15 2021
I really ought to start losing weight...
But, I've got too much on my plate at the moment.
π︎ 59
π
︎ Nov 02 2020
A good romance starts with a good friendship
And a bad romance starts with βra ra ah ah ah, ro ma, ro ma ma ga ga, ooh la laβ
π︎ 64
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︎ Nov 26 2020
Before I start, I need to see if this thing works.
"Everyone named Michael stand up."
Assorted people stand up
"And that concludes the mike check."
π︎ 3
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︎ Jan 12 2021
We Tried Getting Americans to Start Measuring Weight in Kilograms Instead of Pounds
But they were very cagey about it.
π︎ 10
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︎ Nov 14 2020
Why did the Russians car not start?
π︎ 34
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︎ Nov 25 2020
Why does βsecretaryβ start with secret?
Because of all their business affairs
π︎ 17
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︎ Dec 11 2020
Want to start a Hula band that covers music by Poison.
π︎ 2
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︎ Jan 08 2021
Heard the song "Don't Start Now" on the radio.
Told my kids: "If I have to listen to this song one more time, I am going to Dua Lipa off the roof".
π︎ 2
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︎ Jan 05 2021
my transgender son wanted to start on T....
π︎ 11
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︎ Nov 29 2020
Iβm thinking of a word. Starts with P and doesnβt have an ending
π︎ 24
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︎ Nov 21 2020
How does a vampire start a letter?
π︎ 2
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︎ Jan 03 2021
What starts with F and rhymes with yuck?
π︎ 7
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︎ Dec 10 2020
The US Navy will start to equip all their subs with emotional support dogs. After a lot study, they decided on Dachshunds...
...they will be subma-weiners.
π︎ 105
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︎ Oct 24 2020
I have a knock-knock joke, but you have to start it...
Knock-knock.
>!Who's there?!<
Edit: my son told me this. I was confused at why I had to start it and then cracked up when he said βwhoβs there?β
π︎ 19
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︎ Oct 20 2020
Feeling ugly? Work at a bee sanctuary and start helping the world! Everyone will think you are beautiful for that
Because beauty is in the eye of the beeholder
π︎ 90
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︎ Oct 15 2020
Every day, my teacher starts her class by reading a joke from r/dadjokes, but today she is absent.
π︎ 25k
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︎ Jul 31 2020
What starts with 'O' and ends with 'nions' and sometimes make you cry?
π︎ 49
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︎ Dec 05 2020
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