What do you call a radish burglar?

A Dai-con man.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hms_prunce
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
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Why Wasn’t The Radish At The Party?

Because He Didn’t Bother To Turnip!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Matt4307
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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What do you get when you cross a carrot with a radish?

Cash

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lordkauth
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2020
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That's rad... well radish
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Radish00
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
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Radish means slightly Awesome in 90’s vernacular
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Irv-Elephant
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2019
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How does a Radish discipline its Child?

Beeting it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quoto21
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
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A radish is only kinda rad.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thumpingplum
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
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I bought a spoiled radish

It was only slightly rad

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aether_killer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
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What's Captain Kirk's favorite kind of radish?

Daikon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iia
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2016
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My friend always brags about hot beautiful his radishes and carrots are...

He digs roots.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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What do you call a vegetable that's left of center?

Radish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theatahhh
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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Radishing?

My boyfriend threw a radish at me whilst I was walking away from him the other day. Why I asked why he would do such a thing He simply told me I looked radishing...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dottylotty11
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
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β€œHey girl, you look particularly radishing today!”
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2018
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So my friend was complaining about some stuff and then later in the conversation he comments that he likes radishes.

My response: Well, I guess we found the root of all of your problems.

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2016
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πŸ˜‚
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πŸ‘€︎ u/araitisaname
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
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Radishes are kinda cool

Rad... ish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptMcButternut
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2017
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Why are they called "radishes"?

Because they're only sort of awesome.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/drewmeister
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2014
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What vegetable is only a little bit cool?

A radish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/skwee-wee
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2020
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2 Detectives are covering a case with a farmer

Detective 1: explain what happened please

Farmer: someone has been stealing my radishes for the past 2 months!

Detective 1: what do you think detective 2?

Detective 2: idk Beets me...

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
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What type of vegetable tries to be cool, but is only partly successful at is?

The Radish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jt_dunnski
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2020
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What do you call a horse that’s mildly cool?

Horse radish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Little-Daddy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2019
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What do you call a vegetable that's standing in line?

A Queuecumber

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Liutasiun
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2018
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What vegetable is sorta rad, but not totally rad?

A radish

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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What's red, has a tail, and hums?

An electric radish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/doryenas
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2019
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What is small, red, and whispers?

A hoarse radish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nightreach1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2018
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Who is the best dressed vegetable in the market?

Collard Greens.

Though, you should see the dress his girlfriend wore. It was radishing!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2018
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Kids dispute over the color of a spicy root vegetable

Kid 1: They're red!
Kid 2: No, purple!
...
Dad: I'd call it sort of radish-purple.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aaron_Blenkush
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2016
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This conversation between my (ex)gf.

Long post is long:

Her: Remember dad's tomato bushes? Well they're attacking! At least one is leaning across the path trying to get at my window... We had the war of the roses, now its time for the attack of the tomatoes!

Me: I don't remember anything about tomato bushes. From one battle to the next.

Her: Yep! Lookout tomatoes here comes the chutney recipe!

Me: I can just imagine a cucumber campaign. Operation onion would be next, which will fail, causing everyone to cry. Dill Day follows, a great success for the allied gardeners. All too soon though, the kamikaze carrots set in, utterly ruining the radish raid. The mushroom maneuver is employed, saving the troops, allowing them to deal the final blow in the asparagus assault!

Her: Don't forget the pumpkins want to supply ground cover with heavy support...

Me: Ah yes, the pumpkin paratroopers.

Her: Thyme is running out...

Me: Prepare the beetroot bombs!!!

Her: Aim for Potato Garden!

Me: Fire the capsicum! Deploy the celery team!

Her: Bring in the egg plant division to support the capsicum!

Me: This is it boys, life or dirt! I want a passionfruit unit to find us a vantage point, and the strawberry unit to surround them!

Her: We had better bring the lettuce up to date!

Me: The cabbage are under withering fire, we need support from the raspberry division! The potatoes are mashed, so well need to send the zucchini in their place!

Her: The zucchini can't take that heavy fire, they'll be grated. Send spinach for some extra iron. The sweet potatoes are digging in at the ridge.

Me: Prepare the watermelon bomb, we need to finish this! The eggplant were squashed, deploy the broccoli brigade! The beans need to get out of there, or they'll be split!

Her: Cauliflowers are going in to retrieve the beans. How brave to risk their florets!

The corn commandos are deployed, but the artichokes are all out of heart, we need to boost morale.

Me: The leeks are down! They'll be flattened if we don't do something!

Are the spinach still operational?

Her: Too bad the pepper isn't on our side, they're well seasoned troops.

Spinach is a go!
Nothing has touched it...

Me: But wait! We still have the chillies to give them heavy fire!

Her: And the squashes and peas!

Me: The ginger is holding it's ground, but it's being cut down by the pineapple!

The basil should make things interesting, send them to aid the potatoes.

**Her:

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zokoro
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2017
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What do you do when you find a leak in the kitchen?

I don't know, I'm more of a radish kind of guy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iloveeggs3
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2015
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Dad said this in the kitchen...

Mom (making something) - would you like some radish?

Dad- No, I prefer Blueish. (starts giggling)

Both of us just stared at him for a few seconds.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/amateurkarma
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2014
🚨︎ report
What vegetable is kind of cool?

A radish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/avec_serif
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a vegetable that's only somewhat cool?

Radish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BunzarTheFuzzy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Which vegetable is kind of cool?

Radish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RadToTheBone86
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2014
🚨︎ report

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