Papi Puns

Me: "No, son. But, don't be mad that we don't. There's no need to take a fence."

http://i.imgur.com/M357w6o.jpg

Ay papi!

Because Seven was a registered Six offender

So, we're driving up a tree-lined street where people often have wedding/family photos taken. It's lined with live oaks and is pretty beautiful. That prompted this conversation.

12 y/o daughter: Why do people sometimes get their wedding photos taken on train tracks? That doesn't make sense.

Me: Because they choo-choose to? [with a debt to Ralphie Wiggam]

6 y/o daughter (Loud groan): Papi, that's a terrible joke.

Me: So you think you could engineer a better one if I train you?

12 y/o: Dad why do you always make these awful jokes?

Me: Because I've got loco motives!

At that point I started laughing so hard I couldn't come up with anymore.

Our 8 y/o son loves Minecraft. Without our oversight, he'd play all day every day. He was allowed to play on Sunday afternoon. He chose to play survivor mode, and he came running into the room where we were sitting to brag, "MOM, PAPI, I dug a shaft down into this hill and I found TWO DIAMONDS!"

He continued on, "So, since I'm in survival mode, should I use the diamonds to make a hoe or a pickax?" Something like that, comparing what it would cost him from something called his "workbench" and "inventory." Admittedly, I've only played creative mode with him, so I don't know all the terms.

Anyway, without missing a beat, my wife says, "Son, always spend your diamonds on hoes."

I love that woman so very much.

Today I was talking to my dog telling him that he was classically handsome when my dad chimes in and calls my dog ugly.

So I tell my dog "don't listen to him, you're the most handsome puppy in the house"

My dad responds "No, I'm the most handsome papi in the house!"'

("Papi" is father in Spanish)