Pope puns.
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︎ Oct 04 2020
A female pope pun
I thought of this pun in class in university back in the late 90s, and I thought it was funny. I still stand by it, and will do so until I die.
We were discussing the conspiracy that there was possibly a female pope at one time in history. The professor asked how would they even know if a certain pope was female. How would they discover it?
I turned to the guy sitting next to me: "Maybe a Papal smear?"
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︎ May 10 2019
Which cheese is most likely to become the pope?
Swiss, itβs the holiest
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︎ Sep 29 2020
Why wasnβt Cardinal Sicola ever elected as pope
Because they didnβt want a Pope Sicola
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︎ Dec 14 2020
Did you hear about the pope that wanted to be a ninja?
He was a blessing in disguise
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︎ Sep 21 2020
What do you get when the Pope takes a dump?
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︎ Nov 08 2020
What do you call a day you spend with the Pope?
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︎ Oct 26 2020
Pope decides on new measures to keep Cardinals on their toes.
He raised the Vatican urinals by 4 inches.
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︎ Oct 07 2020
What does the pope use to send his blessings?
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︎ Jun 18 2020
Why does the pope like swiss cheese?
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︎ Aug 13 2020
Some people love cats, other people hate them. The pope is obsessed with them....
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︎ Jul 20 2020
What does the Pope say when he wants to bless a pack of cigarettes?
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︎ Aug 08 2020
Why does the Pope love cats?
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︎ Jun 29 2020
Do you know how many women have been pope?
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︎ Apr 08 2020
If the pope likes baseball where would he live?
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︎ May 08 2020
I've seen most of the speeches that the Pope has made and they always seem rather pompous.
He's always pontificating...
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︎ Jan 05 2020
Why did the pope wear crocs to mass?
Because they're his holey shoes
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︎ Nov 25 2019
So the Pope walks into a mosque...
and the Imam says 'Why the wrong faith?'
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︎ Sep 26 2019
βNope,β says the Pope.
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︎ Nov 11 2018
Why does the Pope hate fishing?
Because he has a holy boat.
Sorry, baby is due in January and figured it's time I start working on my dad jokes
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︎ Oct 30 2019
What do you call a pope who is addicted to cats?
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︎ Apr 18 2019
How did the pope get the bird flu?
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︎ Oct 07 2019
How does the Pope dry his hands?
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︎ Sep 11 2019
Why canβt the pope be cremated?
Because heβs still alive.
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︎ Jul 22 2019
What is the pope's pet called?
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︎ May 11 2019
Why did Popeye hate the Pope?
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︎ Sep 24 2019
Did you hear that the Pope has the avian bird flu?
He got it from one of the cardinals
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︎ Feb 14 2016
Have you heard about the pope's kitten addiction?
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︎ May 21 2019
What do you call a pope that always pays you back?
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︎ May 21 2019
So once I was out in front of my house, and the mailman came by with a letter from the Pope. I looked at the man and was surprised to see that he was my brother.
He was my Fatherβs Son with the Holy Post.
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︎ May 10 2019
How does the pope pay for stuff he wins on ebay?
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︎ Jul 20 2014
I heard the pope's toilet exploded the other day
Edit: Holy shit, this blew up
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︎ Jan 20 2019
What did the pope do when a priest died?
Itβs nun of your business
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︎ Apr 09 2019
I found the pope wandering around in my yard...
he said he was just ROME-ing around!
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︎ Apr 15 2019
Pope John-Paul should've been succeeded by Pope George-Ringo
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︎ Jan 28 2018
What do you call the Pope's poop?
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︎ Oct 08 2018
The pope visited the Naval Academy this weekend...
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︎ Mar 09 2018
What would you say if you had breakfast with the Pope?
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︎ Nov 03 2018
Did you hear that the Pope is keeping all the Cardinals on their toes?
He raised the Vatican urinals six inches.
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︎ Jan 13 2020
Do you know how many women have been pope?
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︎ Apr 13 2019
How did the pope get the bird flu?
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︎ Jun 30 2019
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