When I woke up from an operation, the nurse leaned over and said, "You may not feel anything from the waist down."

So I fondled her boobs.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 21
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 05 2021
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What would u call Hitler if he got removed of his own dick by operation and put someone else's dick there?

Dic-traitor

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Kestrokapil
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 30 2020
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My mail man just had a sex change operation.

I guess I should call him a post man now

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 39
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Theunkillable
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 07 2020
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What mathematical operation do the French despise?
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/octalgon
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 16 2020
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After the Sex change operation, The Juggler is too scared to try juggling again.

It seems he doesnโ€™t have the balls to do it again.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Lord_Aarsh
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 28 2020
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A bloke wakes up in hospital after an operation and shouts "Doctor I cant feel my legs"

The doctor said i know we chopped your arms off.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/tiger7971
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 02 2020
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Operation Pothole
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 10k
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/LastAccount29
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 10 2019
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Why did Ho Chi Minh never conduct espionage operations at Christmas?

That's the only time anyone actually looks for Minh's spies.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 26
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/trimofdoom
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 17 2020
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Ever since I went through with my sex change operation my kids have been completely ignoring me

It's like I'm transparent.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 19
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Yanaytsabary
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 04 2020
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Don't worry, I'm fine after the sex operation

No hard feelings.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/within_kamath23
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 13 2020
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My deer cloning operation has succeeded!

I can finally make a quick buck...

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 50
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/shercroft
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Did you know that doctors that perform circumscisions donโ€™t make a lot of money for those operations?

They only get paid in tips.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 342
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Extrovrted_Introvrt
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 03 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Disney isn't going to die and go out of business even though they completely shut down operations and didn't produce anything for three months.

They just suspended animation.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/explosivelydehiscent
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 16 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
What do you call a medical operation to see inside an ocean?

A biop-sea. (Thought this one up while waiting for my biopsy)

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/kishenoy
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
What do you call an operation on a barbie doll

Plastic surgery

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/mypingistrash
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Is there a dessert place called Operation Dessert Storm? Because there probably should be

The mascot could be General Smore man Schwarzkopf

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/TelephoneTable
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 30 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Before my operation, my doctor gave me the option to be knocked out with gas or a boat paddle.

It was an ether/oar situation.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 53
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/JMJTO
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 04 2019
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Before my operation last week, the nurse wanted to know if I could give them a contact number in case of an emergency...

I said, "911."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 29 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Every operation a cardiac surgeon performs is heartfelt
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 15
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/crazyeyedmcgee
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 25 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
What do you tell the doctor before an operation?

B Positive

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/medl0l
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 21 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Did you hear about the midgets starting a beer making operation?

It's a micro brewery!

That was a small joke I just made up. Hopefully it will humor you, a little.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 10 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
After this operation will I be able to play the piano

Yes

Good because I couldnโ€™t do it before

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/sirspence4
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 15 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My doctor says I need an operation, but I can't afford it. I asked the doctor if it was something I could do on my own.

He said, "suture self."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 36
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/RonPalancik
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 08 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
What do you call someone who is in charge of running all operations for a farm?

The CIEIO

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 33
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Kerlandays
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 13 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
The lake by my house was overpopulated with river otters that would bite and harass people. The local gov used explosives to fix the problem. They called it operation otter pop
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/imj23
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 15 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
What did the Allies call the operation to depose Mussolini?

Finito Benito

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/W-eye
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 12 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Whats it called when a women has a sex change operation?

Addadictome

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/shdchko
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 18 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Hey did you hear about that rapper that underwent 3 sex change operations?

Yeah, Lil Confused right?

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/lockpick4862
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 16 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I saw a sign while driving. It said: Bus lane is in operation.

Hopefully it comes out alive.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 13
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/TommehBoi
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 27 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I never see my father after his sex change operation...

It's like he's transparent.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/kalenrb
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 14 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
The kids want to play Operation but I can't bring myself to tell them that the game is missing a piece

I just don't have the heart

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/wawoodworth
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 07 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My wife wanted me to be there for her operation to provide "moral support"

I told her she should probably talk to a priest instead.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/perry-d-astor
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 22 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
How do surgeons do chest operations without breaking the rib cage?

They use the key.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Pdonkey
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 24 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My friend is moving to Africa to teach basic math operations to underprivileged kids.

Upvote for divisibility.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 21
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 11 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My Mom has no problem talking about his recent the sex-change operation.

He's quite TransParent about it.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/rebelyrocks
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 15 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
The movie's plot was showing average day-to-day operations of the pizza shop

A rare glimpse of a slice of life

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 29 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Sex change operations are one thing, but Human to animal operations really give me paws.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Newt24
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 23 2017
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My dad told me he was exhausted after performing hundreds of operations today.

Heโ€™s a math teacher.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/wheezingwaffles
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 07 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Was talking to my dad about his knee operation

He told me he had 5 knees now Left knee

Right knee

Kidney

Hiney

And weenie

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 20
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/bretnova
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 09 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Even though he extremely skeptical, the hunchbackโ€™s wife finally convinced him to see a surgeon to straighten his spine. When the operation was done, he came home and told his wife:

"I stand corrected."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 13
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/tomjim04
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 14 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
A campsite was forced to freeze its operations for a whole day when a spiteful customer paid his entire expenses in 5 cent coins.

The campsite reports that it is the first time that they've encountered such a tent nickel difficulty.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thefizzynator
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 13 2017
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Did you hear about the nationwide sting operation on those who mix drinks?

Many of them are behind bars now.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Calthropstu
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 21 2017
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My wife asked me how I would feel about doing an operation that would turn me into a dog

I said โ€œit would give me paws.โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/sraaschjr
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 25 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report

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