I went to buy some fruit today but the store was mobbed with protesters.

I went bananas.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ElsonDaSushiChef
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 08 2020
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French swing-dancing flash mob exclaims in dismay at being arrested for disorderly conduct.

It was a zut! suit riot.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/conflateer
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 20 2021
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What do you call a group of kangaroos?

A gangaroo.

Credit: friend’s kid.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/redflats
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 15 2021
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What do you call a mob hitman who only kills low-level drug dealer?

A weed whacker.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ivanthemute
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 17 2020
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When attacked by a mob of clowns, go for the juggler.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/flyingtiger79
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2019
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How did the Mob try to influence Marlin Brando’s character in β€˜On the Waterfront’?

By using pier pressure.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rossum81
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 19 2020
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If a mob of clowns ever try to rob you then remember to go for their jugglers first
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PilotDave3
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 04 2019
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I used to be a bartender for the mob.

It was whiskey business.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DarthNuggetz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 11 2020
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The maffia does not discriminate against mob bosses who date both men and women.

They let bi-Dons be bi-Dons.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DreadMoor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 28 2019
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What do you call a recently whacked mob boss?

Al Ca-put

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sioswing
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 13 2019
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What do you call a mob of drooling zombies?

The Salivation Army

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/stooftheoof
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 18 2019
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If attacked by a mob of clowns imgur.com/uTzXU3u
πŸ‘οΈŽ 167
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rainbow_llama_dragon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 06 2015
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Did you hear about the potato farmer who crossed the mob?

He's sleeping with the knishes.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/xwhy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 20 2016
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What’s the human psychology behind all this toilet paper hoarding?

That’s just how we roll

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/awburrou
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 12 2020
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Is the Mob funny?

Dad: "Hey son did you hear about the mobster who passed out in the kitchen."

Son: "Uh...no."

Dad: "Yeah I guess he's sleeping with the dishes."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Staff_Inflection
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 09 2015
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What do you call paparazzi with old timey cameras?

A flash mob

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/God_Of_Pores
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 08 2018
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Skeletone Puns?

Hello !

My friends and I are dressing up as Skellies for a con. We will be carrying signs that will have silly phrases.

We could use more ideas! Any skeleton puns we could use that you love?

Signs will include things like: "minion seeks necromancer, PST" "Have you seen our boss mob?"

ECT!

Looking forward to hearing your ideas! Thanks all!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TogiSoYo
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 30 2018
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What do you call a group of gangsters that refuse to turn off the lights on their cameras

A flash mob

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jmahler0514
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 03 2019
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A skeleton walks into a bar

He orders beer and a mob

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pizzarius
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 02 2019
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My Dad went out with a couple of guys called Barry Allen the other night.

He said it turned into a flash mob.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SeaDragonWhisperer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2017
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Dadjoked my girlfriend at concert

My girlfriend and I went to a Glitch Mob concert a couple of days ago. When we walked into the venue, the smoke machines were already on, it was almost impossible to see the stage. Immediately I turn to her and say

"Man, I don't know if we'll remember this concert tomorrow morning."

"Why?"

"Our memory might be a little foggy."

I had to go look for her in the crowd.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Zaffire
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 07 2014
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What do you call an organized crime ring that sells Adobe products?

A flash mob

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JonnyDhotdog
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 30 2015
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How do stop a mob of attacking clowns?

Go for the juggler

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/toolaroola12
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 14 2020
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If you’re attacked by a mob of clowns

Go for the juggler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/donaldnotTHEdonald
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 02 2020
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If you’re ever attacked by a mob of clowns

Go for the juggler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/donaldnotTHEdonald
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 02 2020
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If attacked by a mob of clowns

Go for the juggler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/darkone2087
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 22 2019
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If you ever get attacked by a mob of clowns

Be sure to go for the juggler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RendolfGirafMstr
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 07 2019
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What do you do if attacked by a mob of clowns?

Go for the juggler

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jimitex22
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 14 2018
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If attacked by a mob of clowns...

go for the juggler!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cowboy_christmas
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2018
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How do you stop an angry mob of clowns?

Go for the juggler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/termiAurthur
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 22 2017
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If you're ever attacked by a mob of clowns...

... go straight for the Juggler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FrequencySulphur1916
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 04 2015
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If you're ever attacked by a mob of clowns, remember this...

Go for the juggler!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dizmodo
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 15 2017
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How do you subdue a mob of clowns?

Go for the juggler.

sigh.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gmikoner
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 28 2014
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