The looting and rioting going on today is terrible, but if you're a man you shouldn't find it funny.
Because manslaughter is a crime.
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︎ May 30 2020
Why did the king vomit when he discovered the peasants were rioting?
Because he found them revolting
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︎ Jun 12 2018
Have a riot at this pun
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︎ Jan 12 2021
Whatβs the difference between the police response to Black Lives Matter protests and their response to the Capitol Hill riots?
Well, itβs black and white.
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︎ Jan 07 2021
Why do police get to riots early?
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︎ Sep 20 2020
Communists around the world watched gleefully as the Washington riots unfolded.
Karl Marx was right when he wrote Das Capitol.
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︎ Jan 08 2021
Why did the riot cop leave for work early?
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︎ Jun 19 2020
Why do riot police arrive early to the protests?
... so they can beat the crowds!
Edit: Wow, this is now my second highest upvoted post ever, and it's not even my own joke! Totally should have credited the video I saw this in: https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/h8btkp/protester_has_a_joke_for_the_police_officers/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Thanks for the laughs and great comment threads, Reddit :)
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︎ Jun 13 2020
do you know why police like to arrive early at riots?
They like to beat the crowd!!!!
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︎ Sep 10 2020
A Chinese restaurant was recently destroyed in the riots.
It was wonton destruction.
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︎ Oct 11 2020
Heard about the time the surgeons rioted?
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︎ Sep 24 2020
Have you heard the joke about the capital building?
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︎ Jan 06 2021
I tried out some riot control equipment today...
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︎ Aug 09 2020
Unintentional dadjoke when discussing the riots
I totally get the rage, I just don't get the Target.
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︎ May 31 2020
What do you call a potato that heads downtown to start a riot?
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︎ Jun 08 2020
It turns out the capitol rioter did NOT accidentally kill himself with a taser to the balls and the story was just made up to disrespect him...
I don't think anyone is shocked.
(Source: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/capitol-riot-taser-death)
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︎ Jan 11 2021
So there was a protest the other day. Someone told a joke, and nobody could stop laughing. It was a riot.
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︎ Jun 01 2020
During the riots the other day, a person was beat up by six dwarfs.
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︎ Jun 04 2020
There's a riot about cake toppings in London tomorrow
Police expect hundreds and thousands to show up
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︎ Jun 20 2020
Why wouldn't the Republicans impeach Donald Trump?
They insist on bringing a baby to full term.
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︎ Sep 08 2020
Did you hear about the Spanish bread riots?
It's complete and utter panarchy.
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︎ Nov 08 2019
"A Riot an the Renaissance Faire!"
Police intervened before anyone began luting.
(Stolen from today's Shoe comic strip... But too good not to share.)
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︎ Jan 10 2020
What do you get when you cross a policeman with a skunk ?
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︎ Jul 18 2020
What do blm protestors and cod players have in common?
They both hate people who use riot shields
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︎ Nov 01 2020
The panda bears rioted in the streets of Beijing today.
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︎ Oct 18 2019
Breaking news: There's a riot in progress at the Kentucky Derby.
Authorities are saying it's race-related.
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︎ Apr 03 2019
With all the riots French bakeries must be in a world of pain.
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︎ Dec 14 2018
There's a rather unknown Greek myth that involved Zeus farting so loudly that it caused powerful lightning storms all over Greece. Panic and chaos ensued, and there was widespread looting as fires raged out on control.
Thus began the Zeus Toot Riots.
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︎ Jul 07 2020
A merchant approached the captain of a SWAT team about upgrading their riot shields...
The captain replied, "Finally! A purchase I can get behind!"
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︎ Feb 21 2019
Riots broke out at the thickest shirt competition...
They suffered heavy casual tees.
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︎ Mar 25 2019
Have you heard the joke about getting rid of covid?
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︎ Jun 10 2020
Did you hear about the riot in the whisk factory?
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︎ Jan 29 2018
Has anyone heard that joke that seemingly cures Covid-19?
I havent yet, but I heard its a riot
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︎ Jun 09 2020
Did you hear that they came out with a cure for the Coronavirus?
Me neither... But apparently it's a riot!
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︎ Jun 15 2020
One of my friends recently told me heβs bored and looking for a fun new hobby. I suggested getting involved in political protesting.
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︎ Jun 03 2020
Did you hear about the riots on Mars?
The government declared Martian Law.
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︎ Oct 17 2017
You know what would be funny? A large group of people protesting, getting into fights with police and destroying property.
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︎ May 14 2020
Why do police get to riots early?
π︎ 10k
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︎ Sep 07 2020
Why do the police show up early to the riots?
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︎ Sep 07 2020
Why does the riot police get up so early?
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︎ Jun 14 2020
Why do the riot police wake up so early?
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︎ Jun 16 2020
Why does the riot police get up so early?
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︎ Jun 09 2020
Why do Riot Police get up early?
>!They do it to beat the crowds!!<
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︎ Jun 14 2020
Why do the riot police always arrive early to protests?
Because they like to beat the crowd.
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︎ Jun 24 2019
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