Apparently there is bi-partisan agreement in Congress that medicinal marijuana should be allowed for the purpose of relieving arthritis pain...
In other words, there is joint support for joint support for joint support...
What is it called when you use lumber in Medicinal practice?
It's medicinal. She's cured.
My wife works in animal medicine and rolled her eyes at me. "Where does a vet who specializes in neutering live?"
There's a medicine you can buy that apparently cures scepticism.
Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
My wife raises animals and also sells medicines
She's a farmercist
(based on a true story)
Given that a case of the sniffles means staying home from school, we give my daughter a daily allergy medicine. My wife was giving her breakfast before school, and when I walked out, I asked if she’d had her medicine yet.
My daughter said yes, and I replied, “So you’re de-Claritin that you’ve had it already?”
What do you call it when a Mexican man takes medicines for his anxiety
Hispanic attacks his panic attacks
Did you hear the Journal of Modern Medicine rejected an article about Midol?
The editor said it was not current at all, but more of a period piece!
My ADHD medicine comes in a case shaped like a 3-sided polygon where each side is the same size, and the pills are distributed uniformly.
It's an equal Adderall triangle.
Don't you think Gonorrhoea would be a great name for Diarrhea medicine?
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
I started practicing complementary medicine.
I made a medicine using ducks that can cure cancer...
Medicine
Where do fish go to get medicine The pharmasea
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine
That made him the centaur for disease control
My wife and I went to the Museum of Medicine and we were browsing the exhibits...
Wife: "Look, they used to treat pain with willow bark".
Me: "I'll give that one 3 stars".
Wife: "This one is about the invention of antibiotics".
Me: "I'll give it 8 out of 10".
Wife: "Apparently, they used give people cowpox to protect them from smallpox".
Me: "Definitely 2 thumbs up".
Wife: "Why do you keep doing that?".
Me: "I'm the curator of this museum"!
Instead of medicine, my hippie girlfriend cured her hemorrhoid using only the "power of positive suggestion."
They say laughter is the best medicine but where do you get it?
My dad is getting too old for a medicine cabinet.
What Do You Call a Type of Medicine That You’re Related To?
You know what would’ve been a good name for a diarrhea medicine?
Decided on a career change, from the kitchen to medicine. Didn’t last long though.
Turns out that thyme doesn’t heal all wounds.
How does Vanna White take her constipation medicine?
My medicine makes me depressed
Did you hear about the new topical birth control medicine?
They’re calling it Sonblock.
Viagra is the worst medicine for depression.
Because everything will get only harder.
When I first heard of gonorrhea...
I thought it was an anti-diarrhea medicine.
Actual conversation today. My wife: "i'm tired of anaesthesiology. What other area of medicine should I try?"
/r/Jokes/comments/g6zr2k/…
Why did the little boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
Because he heard there were sleeping pills in there.
My pharmacist asked how my medication was flavored.
So I gave him a taste of his own medicine.
What is the medicine vampires takes when sick ?
What happens, when a doctor catches a disease, that he already found the cure for?
He gets a taste of his own medicine.
Blood and Organ related puns please
So a colleague is leaving my work (transfusion medicine lab) to work as an information manager for the organ transplant service. I make cards and I’m trying to think up something punny to write on/in his card and I’ll paint a picture on the front for context. I was thinking like “bloody good luck” or “sorry you’re transplanting”... but less shitty!
Thanks in advance :)
How many jokes about medicine does it take before people get sick of them?
Baguette medicine is what I need
Tonight, my daughter assisted me in hanging a new medicine cabinet.
Me: I think I measured wrong. The toggle bolts aren't lining up with the darned holes. Man, I really screwed this up.
Her: Did you........make a pun?
Me: concentrating on the task at hand Huh?
Her: Never mind.
Me: gets it Ha! No, but that's awesome! "Screwed" it up. Ha! You're a PunMaster!
Her: You're a dork.
My schizophrenia medicine is really messing with me...
and me and me and me and me.
If you looked into my medicine cabinet...
...you would assume I have very conflicting views on biotics.
Just when I thought medicine had gone to the dogs...
What is Halloween's favorite medicine?
Any brand of coffin cold.
Apparently there is bi-partisan agreement in Congress that medicinal marijuana should be allowed for the purpose of relieving arthritic pain.
In other words, there is joint support for joint support for joint support.
Where do fish go to get medicine
Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine
In Greek mythology, Chiron was half man, half horse. He had knowledge and wisdom in medicine.
You could say he was the centaur for disease control
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