MOO Puns

A milk dud

Dog 2 - What in the world is Moo Moo? Dog 3 - I'm learning a foreign language!

Cowifornia

He was studying foreign languages.

Cowch

But she wouldn't take neigh for an answer.

https://i.imgur.com/66ijBh6.jpg

Oh MOOgosh. This might just sound like a load of Bull, but please STEER me out.

Deja Moo (Sung to the tune of Fresh Prince of Bel-air)

Now these are puns all about COWS

Their milk gets flipped, churned all around.

And I’d like to take a minute but I won’t stop and prattle

And tell you this story you haven’t HERD about cattle.

In IstanBULL I was born and BRAISED.

In the pastures back then in my HAYDAYS.

Chewing cud, RUMPING round, and making a fuss.

TANNING out so UDDERLY ridiculous.

When a couple of HEIFERS who had BEEF with me

Started BULLying on my Brand , you see.

I got TIPPED over once and my mom got scared

She said you're MOOvin your behind, your butt, your DAIRY Air.

I whistled for a calf and when it came near

Thought she was a babe, but HE was a STEER!

If anything I can say this STEAK is rare

But that Bovine was BO-FINE so I didn’t care!

I got milked a few times, maybe 7 or 8

More like long-gonehorn, than reliable date.

So I CHUCKED out the udder half of the pasture,

Bevo ain’t a cow, don’t got what I’m after.

Fun fact: a Dairy Cow can produce 125lbs of saliva a day.

De-calf-inated!

Edit: it's been pointed out some people pronounce calf as cālf, so its taking a second. Pronounce it like decaffeinated coffee.

I said "That means it's pasture bedtime."

I told my wife "That cat would have way more grip on roof shingles and I expect more I realism from talking cartoon cows. This is "UDDERLY" ridiculous."

She may have buried her head and avoided eye contact for a bit. I was proud.

What an udder disaster.

They are great at spotting moo-vement

Never herd of them!

Must've been Mount Heiferest.

Who’s there?

Interrupting cow

Interrupting c..

MOO!

Cattlelogs

MOOING GUM.................................................................. My 8 year old told me this and I'm curious as to how many up votes it gets, if you don't like it please down vote without any bad feelings .

Where do Cows get their meds?

At the phar-Moo-cy

Because they're calfinated

Why did the tree moo?

Because there was a cow stuck in it!

When an eel bites your hand, And that's not what you planned, That's a moray.

When our habits are strange, And our customs deranged, That's our mores.

When your horse munches straw, And the bales total four, That's some more hay.

When Othello's poor wife Becomes stabbed with a knife, That's a Moor, eh?

When a Japanese knight Uses his sword in a fight, That's Samurai.

When your sheep go to graze In a damp marshy place, That's a moor, eh?

When your boat comes home fine And you tie up her line, That's a moor, eh?

When you ace your last tests Like you did all the rest, That's some more "A"s!

In New Zealand you see An aborigine, That's a Maori.

Alley Oop's homeland has A space gun with pizzazz, That's a Moo Ray.

A comedian ham, With the name Amsterdam, That's a Morey.

When your chocolate graham, Is so full and so crammed, That s'more, eh.

When you've had quite enough, Of this dumb rhyming stuff, That's "No more!", eh?

Moo Zealand.

moo-hoo

For all the moo law

Whose there?

Cow says

Cow says who?

No, cow says moo, dummy

The captain was standing on the deck!

Moo-slims

Cow-moo-flage.

It's pasture bedtime

... are my calves mooing.

Knock Knock / Who's there?

Interrupting cow.

Interrupting cow wh—

Moooooooo!

There should be a Trump version.

Knock knock / Who's there?

Interrupting Trump.

Interrupting Trump wh—

Fake moos!

>A MOO MOO!

<<Thanks folks! I'm here all week! Don't forget to tip your cows!>>

They figured they could make a lot of Moo Neigh.

He was just trying to think outside the bawks

The people believe in Fake Moos.

Everyone knows the interrupting cow knock knock joke but we like making up KKJs for other cows. Here are some of ours; please add more so I can continue to surprise and delight the young people near and dear to me. TIA!

(Obviously each joke goes "Knock knock" etc. I'll just write the "cow" part and the punchline)

• French cow: le moo

• Backwards cow: oom

• Upside down cow: woo

• Sad cow: moo hoo hoo

• Ghost cow: moo-oo-oo-oooo

• Police cow: moo ee oo ee oo ee oo

• Cow on a motorbike: (make zooming moo)

• Cow in disguise: Baa

• Horse in disguise: Moo

• Invisible cow: (quickly cover child's eyes) Moo

• Inaudible cow:

I said it’s because it’s pasture bedtime.

Moo outta my way, you cow.