A list of puns related to "Loan"
Because he wanted no strings attached.
....if you can prove you don't need it.
But I'm worried I'll be drowning in debt
I told him don't even sphinx about it
Instead of Mortgage Freeman.
He kneaded the dough.
It always thought it was right, but it was really quite obtuse.
He was losing interest.
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation." Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.
The frog says $30,000.
The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.
Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"
The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone"
I just don't know how I could ever repay them!
I don't think I can ever repay you.
I flat out refused. Why would I take money from someone who has no interest?
She was able to cosine.
Cause I'd like to have you around for the rest of my life.
It was a bond movie
They said if I didnβt pay it back on time Iβd get repossessed.
Because itβs parents wouldnβt cosine
All he has for collateral is a ceramic statue. The loan officer, Patty Black, is unsure of what to do so she consults with her supervisor; "Oh fine", he says. "It's a knick knack Patty Black, give the frog a loan."
Bernadette
I said, "what's your angle?"
When he got there, a woman extended her hand.
"Good afternoon, sir," she said. "My name is Patricia Wack. How may I help you today?"
Kermit replied, "Hi-ho, Patricia! I'm Kermit the Frog, and I would like to borrow some money."
They walked over to her desk and sat down.
"Certainly, Mr. Frog--"
"Oh, just call me Kermit."
"Okay... Kermit. How much money would you like to borrow?"
"Ten thousand dollars."
Mildly surprised, Ms. Wack looked intently at Kermit.
"Do you have any references?"
"Well, I suppose I could use my father, Keith Richards."
Ms. Wack froze for a second, then...
"THE Keith Richards?"
"Oh, yes. In fact, he told me he's friends with your manager, which is why I came in here."
"Okay... Do you have any collateral?"
"Excuse me?"
"Collateral. Something of value, like a car, or a boat..."
"Oh, yes! I do have something. I have this."
Kermit reached into his briefcase and placed a small figurine on the desk. Patricia looked curiously at the object, then at our amphibious friend.
"What's this?"
"It's a Hummel."
"A what?"
"A Hummel. They're supposed to be quite valuable. Well, at least this one is to me."
She picked up the Hummel and stood up.
"If you don't mind, I would like to show this to the manager."
"Oh, no! I don't mind at all!"
So, Patricia took the Hummel to the manager's office, knocked on the door, and walked inside.
"Patricia! What can I do for you?"
"Mr. Wilson, there's this... frog named Kermit at my desk, and he wants to borrow $10,000, but he has only this for collateral."
Mr. Wilson looked at the Hummel, then out to her desk.
"I don't see anything out of order here."
"But, Mr. Wilson--"
"Look, it's a knick-knack, Patty Wack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
...a transaction
Years later and the loan is worth $23,000
She said she'd trade it for more dad jokes any day<3
...I feel very loanly
At the word bank
Bernadette
Hey Pell.
Cough up the dough
I'm forever in your debt.
If I donβt pay it back, Iβm going to get repossessed.
It's a knick knack, patty whack. Give a frog a loan?
One of the classic Β Abbott and Costello Β routines, where Bud Abbott takes advantage of a common math mistake that we all make to fleece his pal, Lou Costello, out of all of his money. Β The skit ends with a simple βread my mindβ routine that takes Louβs last remaining bill. Β This routine was done Β many Β times, both in the movies and their radio show.
Bud Abbott: Do me a favor, loan me $50.
Lou Costello: Bud, I canβt. I canβt loan you $50.
Bud Abbott: Oh, yes, ya can.
Lou Costello: No, I canβt. All I got is $40.
Bud Abbott: All right, give me the $40 and youβll owe me 10 Β
Lou Costello: Ok, Iβll owe you 10.
Bud Abbott: Thatβs right.
Lou Costello: How come I owe you 10?
Bud Abbott: How much did I ask for?
Lou Costello: 50
Bud Abbott: How much did you give me?
Lou Costello: 40.
Bud Abbott: So you owe me $10.
Lou Costello: Thatβs right. Β [Pause] But you owe me 40.
Bud Abbott: Donβt change the subject.
Lou Costello: Iβm not changing the subject; youβre trying to change my finances. Come on, Abbott give me my $40.
Bud Abbott: All right, thereβs your $40, now give me the 10 you owe me.
Lou Costello: Iβm paying you on account.
Bud Abbott: On account?
Lou Costello: On account I donβt know how I owe it to ya.
Bud Abbott: Thatβs the way you feel about it, thatβs the last time I ask you for a loan of $50.
Lou Costello: But how can I loan ya $50, now. All I got is 30.
Bud Abbott: Well, give me the 30 and youβll owe me 20.
Lou Costello: Ok. This is getting worse all the time. (Look at audience) First I owe him 10, now I owe him 20.
Bud Abbott: Well, why do you run yourself into debt?
Lou Costello: Iβm not running in, youβre pushing me!1
Bud Abbott: I canβt help it if you canβt handle your finances. I do all right with my money.
Lou Costello: And you do all right with my money too.
Bud Abbott: Now I asked you for a loan of $50. You gave me 30, so you owe me 20. 20 and 30 is 50.
Lou Costello: No. No. No. 25 and 25 is 50.
Bud Abbott: All right, hereβs your $30, now give me the 20 you owe me. Fine guy, wonβt loan a pal $50.
The frog pulls out a small weird shaped item, made of ceramic. Ms. Black isnβt sure what to make of it, so she asks her manager. He takes one look at the item, and says, βWhy thatβs a knick knack Patty Black, give that frog a loan!β
Now he is Christopher No-loan
He lost interest
Edit: *Why
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation." Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.
The frog says $30,000.
The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.
Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"
The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone"
I donβt think I can ever repay you.
The frog is greeted by the teller whose name is Patty Whack. The frog asks Patty for a loan, patty tells the frog to get the loan she will need a reference and a form of collateral. The frog says βwell my father is Mick Jagger and I have a small porcelain elephant that I can give you. Patty says βIβll need to speak with my managerβ and leaves to the back. When Patty returns the frog asks βwhat did the manager say?β and she tells the frog the manager said βItβs a Knick-knack Patty Whack, give the frog a loan, his old man is a Rolling Stone!β
I don't think I could ever repay you.
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