What do you call a drunk person fumbling with their car keys?

A taxi

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SubstantialBelly6
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 13 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What type of key makes it harder to unlock your front door?

Whiskey

๐Ÿ‘︎ 55
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/incredibleinkpen
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 01 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Communication is Key (Context on Slide 2) reddit.com/gallery/nm7vzv
๐Ÿ‘︎ 13
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/OculusEnd
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 27 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I went to a warehouse that held replacement keyboard keys. Huge bins overflowing with letters, numbers, function keys, boxes blocking the aisles full of arrows, and Windows and Apple keys. Space bars everywhere!

They were out of Control.

Luckily I found an Escape.

I got Home eventually.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/phelyan
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 30 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why do fish sing off key?

Cause you canโ€™t tuna fish.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 45
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/pitmule
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I asked a pianist why he was banging the side of his head against the keys.

He told me he was playing by ear.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/BellaLugosisChips
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 21 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Singers might open doors with their talents, but thieves can do it off key.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ForestValkyrie
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
3 Key Moments
๐Ÿ‘︎ 18
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/surlzfzfbsjwnsnswk
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I donโ€™t get along with car keys...

Theyโ€™re always trying to start something

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jtfiction
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My friend claims he works in a soap factory, adding a key ingredient to the process...

He's a lye-er.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 01 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Which is the astronaut's favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 28
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CantPickCoffee
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What is an astronauts favourite key on a computer

A space bar

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/joeytherealking
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 02 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time

The spacebar

๐Ÿ‘︎ 258
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Need_no_Reddit_name
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The key to losing weight is patience

So take your time and wait.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/nossin
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A thief took my Microsoft Office license key

I'll come and get you thief! You have my Word

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/danuser8
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 20 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
To the person who stole my Microsoft Office key.

Im gonna find you. You have my word.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ayewussupahaha
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The monster took all the keys off my keyboard.

Now I'm out of control and there's no escape.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Perrin42
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What's a lazy worker's least favorite keyboard key?

The shift key.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Konato-san
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
No key and The Bandit.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/awesome_smokey
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I broke a key off my keyboard yesterday...

I lost control.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 30
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Cthutzpah
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a fish that sings right on key?

A tunable fish.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/lspeed64
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The key to falling asleep quickly is to sleep at the edge of the bed.

You'll soon drop off.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 21
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/West_Yorkshire
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The detective thought he found the key to solving the baker mystery.

Turns out it was just a bread herring.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Vilateral
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What kind of key is edible?

A turkey ๐Ÿฆƒ happy thanksgiving

๐Ÿ‘︎ 79
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/b-dummy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My neighbour is a key worker.

He picks locks.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A slice of key line pie in Jamaica is 2.75, while a slice in the Bahamas is 3.50.

Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I've removed all the black keys from my piano

Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 36
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Gell0us
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
He found the don-key to getting out reddit.com/r/Eyebleach/coโ€ฆ
๐Ÿ‘︎ 33
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did President Xi Jinping order the caplock keys to be removed from all Chinas computers?

Because he was afraid of Capitalism!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Frindwamp
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 17 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I was up all of last night, trying to find my keys

Then it dawned on me

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Folically-endowed
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Did you know the Allen key was named after the guy who invented it.

His name was Sir Anthony Key

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jmaverick1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Where did the keys on a computer keyboard went to celebrate new years eve

To the space bar !!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DumbA5h
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the 46th president say while taking the White House keys from the 45th on his way out?

Bi den.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DancinOnTheMoon
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Which Keys?

How does the baker open up the kitchen cabinet?

He uses the cook-keys.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jslee_beats0608
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Do you know what is the favorite key of the astronauts?

The Spacebar

๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RaulCasquinha69
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The key to a great Thanksgiving dinner is...

The tur-KEY.

Also, the key to a fun visit to the zoo is the mon-key.

And the key to a great science fiction movies is a Woo-key.

To ensure the maximum amount of eye-rolls, casually drop these into the conversation several minutes apart.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/weirdgroovynerd
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Hey look a monk-key
๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/itchycjm1010
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I asked my local locksmith why he's still open during these crazy times. Turns out he's a key worker.

So is the piano shop owner next door.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DarthVarn
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Patience is key
๐Ÿ‘︎ 68
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Un_FaZed211
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Just got my new keyboard. Looks like the keys are taking things quite literally.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 33
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dpk38
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Hereโ€™s a key steak holder
๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ShroomBroom
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
You loose ya phone and ya wallet but Alicia keys still there.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/throwitintheair22
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just got some keys cut...

He must be really good, his shop is lined with trophies.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Mex5150
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I don't like music in the key of E minor

It gives me a case of the E G B Gs

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/icemage27
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Good communication is key or else

You will get something in your eye

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/xXFox_SonaXx
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I love pressing the F5 key.

It's very refreshing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 256
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/FinalCaveat
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 01 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just lost a key on my keyboard

Now its all out of control

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Cjyea124
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.