My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."

"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"

πŸ‘︎ 177
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a group of bunnies hopping backwards

A receding hare line

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheLama27
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I was thinking about hopping in the shower...

But I realized that I might slip and hurt myself

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/larkguit
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards ?

A receding hare-line !

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I was going to spend Friday night studying stinging polyps that spend major part of their lifetime attached to rocks at the bottom of the sea, but a couple pals wanted me to go bar hopping...

With friends like that, who needs anemones?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Buns hopping around
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EktoHunter
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My dad was telling me a story about how he once saw The Beatles hopping into a sedan after their show

It was a Fab Four-door

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mr_wilson3
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a woman hopping along with 1 leg

I asked her if she needed any help?

She said she was looking for her right prosthetic leg.

I said I’ve only got the wrong one here sorry.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Naiphe
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2018
🚨︎ report
with all my friends hopping on bandwagons...

I think it's about time for me to hop on one myself.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hopelessnerd-exe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2017
🚨︎ report
Me: I’m going to hop in the shower

Dad: Don’t hurt yourself!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/overtlysecretive
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
🚨︎ report
Q: What's the name of J.K. Rowling's hip-hop album?

A: Fantastic Beats and Where to Find Them.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zjunkmale
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a hip-hop group made of bakers?

The Yeastie Boys

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AudenWolfe
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I can’t believe it’s not...
πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the mischievous green onion that sang hip hop?

He was a real rapscallion.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TrefoilHat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Where can I learn about hip-hop?

On the wiki-wiki-wiki.

πŸ‘︎ 76
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/johnnyrottenjr
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Mama Frog was really struggling with her youngest, Little Hop. He couldn’t seem to sit still!

That is, at least not long enough to learn any of the many, many important things a frog needs to learn in order to be a frog.

You see, a frog needs to be super slick in order to get by. A frog without proper skills, well, he may as well be a toad.

Anyways, every time Mama Frog went about trying to teach Little Hop something, he would just bounce.. and bounce.. and bounce..

And every time Mama Frog had reached her limit of patience, right before giving up, she’d say to Little Hop, β€œIf you keep on keepin’ on hoppin around all aimless, I’m gonna turn you into a toad!”

Which, upon hearing, Little Hop would stop his hop and settle. You see, he knew well enough that he wanted no part of being a toad.

Well, on one particular day, during one such lesson, Little Hop had taken again to bouncing here, and bouncing there - and just about everywhere besides a place he could listen! And on this same particular day, Mama Frog’s patience was worn real, real, thin, you see, and she got sudden filled with a terrible frustration.

And just like a firecracker went off, in a sudden snap, Mama Frog turned Little Hop straight into a toad!

And when it was done, Mama Frog looked at him direct, shook her head, and said..

β€œI toad you so.”

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/martianrome
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What can a hip hop battle rapper use for protection against the harshest rhymes?

Bubble rap

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/uneeq33
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What's a frog's favorite drug?

Croakaine.

(Thanks Sam Reigel)

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rathabro
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
You know you're getting old when...

You go from hip-hopping, to hip popping.

πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bdemi6
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a hip hop Dinosaur?

A Raptor

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/skyhighjams
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
People always ask me why I made a hip hop album about yogurt.

I tell them that I did it for the culture.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
News from the boardroom
πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mister_Aitch
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Hop in
πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/absolutely_tired
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I know why beer and frog legs go together so well!

It's the HOPS!

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BastetLXIX
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call existentialist hip-hop music?

Angsta Rap

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DreadMoor
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know frogs taste like beer?

They're full of hops!

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/trashconverters
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Hop in the shower v.redd.it/xp1r5miwj0d41
πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SQUIDDYYYYY
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
🚨︎ report
There's a new rap artist who combines a modern hip hop sound with 80s retro pop.

Waka Flocka Seagulls.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jDubbaYo
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
If I ever lose my leg in an accident, don’t think I’m lining up a proposal

I’m just always down on one knee

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ndaacwks
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report
While I was at the gym, I decided to hop on a treadmill.

People started giving me weird looks, so I started jogging instead.

πŸ‘︎ 487
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sp1cyRice
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a green onion that makes it big as a hip hop star?

A rapscallion

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/t1m_b3nz3dr1n3-0
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the car hop?

It had one boot

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Octopus-Pawn
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
🚨︎ report
2020 is unprecedented

And Trump is Unpresidented.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/whyistherum
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the North Korean hip-hop crew that escaped to the south?

it was called Run DMZ.

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cuank
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Back when I worked at a different brewery, one of the brewers only had one leg.

She was in charge of the hops.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DukeofZebulon
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Whats a phrogs favorite music

Hip hop

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lidl_thicc_duck
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Looks like someone hopped on the bus
πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrSparkleyShorts
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
🚨︎ report
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."

"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"

πŸ‘︎ 18k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call fifteen rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hareline.

πŸ‘︎ 408
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SpeedingEmu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a row of bunnies hopping backwards!

A receding Hareline

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AkiKuro14
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a straight line of bunnies hopping backwards?

A receding hairline

πŸ‘︎ 545
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SoulOfCthulhu
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hare-line!

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2016
🚨︎ report
What do you call a line of rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hare line.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mastrwill
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call one hundred rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hareline

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Science_is_punny
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a group of bunnies hopping backwards...

a receding hare line.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fullmiz
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What is another name for a Hip Hop Onion?

A rapscallion.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DudeWithRedditAcc
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do frogs taste like beer?

Cause they are full of hops.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jj8o8
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to the gym and hopped on the treadmill.

People started looking at me weird, so I started jogging instead.

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dumb-reply
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
🚨︎ report
I like to eat frogs, they taste like beer

Because they’re full of hops

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/serialcompliment
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report

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