For the gardening folks
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︎ Feb 02 2021
Gardening may be a gamble...
But I feel like a winner. Weed em and reap!
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︎ Jan 15 2021
Santa Claus announced that heβs giving everyone the same gardening tool for Christmas.
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︎ Dec 06 2020
I canβt really think of any gardening related jokes recently
Most of them are planted in the dirt tier
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︎ Nov 21 2020
Over quarantine Iβve really gotten into gardening. I am especially enamored with growing chard varieties. So much so Iβve written a book of poems about their taproots.
I hope to one day be recognized as the beet poet of our generation!
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︎ Nov 09 2020
My neighbour with big boobs was gardening topless in their yard again...
I just wish his wife would come out with him
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︎ Jun 06 2020
How does Pacman do the gardening?
...With a weed waka waka waka
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︎ Jul 18 2020
I wanted to start gardening but I have a problem
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︎ Jun 24 2020
Has anyone else's gardening skills improved during this quarantine like mine have ?
I planted myself on the sofa at the beginning of April and I've grown bigger ever since
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︎ Jun 21 2020
After a year of waiting, my publisher finally approved my book on gardening
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︎ Jun 03 2020
I never really cared for gardening, but after planting a few seeds..
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︎ Feb 29 2020
I was planning to get into gardening
But I havenβt botany plants
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︎ Oct 13 2019
βIβve always been afraid of gardening, but then I decided to grow a pearβ
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︎ Dec 01 2019
My ex- rapper friend decided to stop his gardening business because he was really careless with his tools.
He has hoes in different area codes.
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︎ Apr 05 2019
Recently, I have started gardening and started to plant all my herbs in alphabetical order. People often ask how I find the time.
I tell them βitβs next to the sageβ
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︎ Feb 28 2019
My girlfriend really likes to cosplay as gardening tools.
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︎ Jun 24 2019
Sherlock was gardening when Watson came over and asked what he was planting.
"A lemon tree, my dear Watson".
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︎ Sep 08 2018
I went out to my shed to find my gardening tools were flirting with other gardeners
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︎ Jun 10 2019
I've recently got into rock gardening
I got nothing to grow yet though.
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︎ Jun 14 2019
I was terrified of gardening.
But I finally decided to grow a pear.
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︎ Mar 27 2018
I was heading to the department store to pick up some gardening supplies and my wife asked me to pick up one of those tangle free hoses.
I guess she isnβt into the kinky stuff.
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︎ Jun 20 2019
What do you call a Spaniard who's really into home gardening?
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︎ Feb 08 2019
Iβve been doing some gardening lately
I went to the hardware store to pick up some plants and seeds for my garden, and my thyme seeds wouldnβt scan. The manager told me I could just have them, so I guess Iβve got some free thyme on my hands.
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︎ May 18 2019
Iβve always been afraid of gardening.
But then I decided to grow a pear
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︎ Aug 12 2018
x-post from r/gardening
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︎ May 29 2017
There is a gardening show coming to my town
When I found out I got so excited I wet my plants
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︎ Mar 20 2018
gardening
Your Italian neighbour has a goose in his garden. You give him a second one. What does he have?
Asparagus.
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︎ Jan 05 2019
What is the most popular gardening magazine in the world?
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︎ Dec 25 2018
What do you call a book on DIY underwater gardening?
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︎ Nov 12 2018
I like gardening, my wife not so much
She just like hoeing around
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︎ Feb 14 2018
Gardening question: Anyone know a good place to buy a fern?
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︎ May 05 2017
My friend just got a job at a gardening company
I wonder if he gets any leave time.
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︎ Jan 24 2015
My experience gardening
I decided to grow a garden this year. Most of the plants grew really well, but one of my herb plants struggled and eventually died so I had to throw it out. It was thyme.
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︎ Jun 26 2016
Gardening is hard...
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︎ Jan 25 2018
Someone should name their gardening shop "Plant Parenthood"
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︎ Jan 04 2015
i started an insurance company for flower and gardening businesses...
it's called "oopsie daisies"
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︎ Sep 04 2016
I was gardening with my son...
We were digging out where the fish pond was going to be, and he went to get his sister to help because it was "fun for the HOLE family"
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︎ Sep 28 2016
So we are working in the yard today and I look over at my wife and say, "You know what they say about gardening.....
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︎ Mar 04 2018
Saw my wife adjusting the top soil while gardening.
Me: This looks like a great detective novel.
Her: What?
You: You know. The plot thickens.
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︎ Jan 10 2018
I'd love to get into gardening...
...now that I have more thyme on my hands.
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︎ Jul 27 2017
Gardening Dad Joke
Me and the hubby were doing some gardening and I said to him "we need a wood stake" (so we could stabilize a tomato plant) and he replied "first we gotta find a wooden cow"...good thing ur cute babe :)
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︎ Jul 01 2017
Gardening with my parents...
...when I was younger, and my dad asked me to "fetch me the hoe".
Neither him nor mum were impressed when I called mum over.
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︎ Mar 01 2016
I asked my local gardening store what I should plant in my first garden.
They gave me some sage advice.
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︎ Nov 20 2014
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︎ Sep 11 2013
Just gardening when my uncle asks me a question.
"What are you planting?"
"Hostas, seedums and..."
"Yeah I see them 1-2-3-4-5."
Doesn't help much when my dad dropped a "Seedum grow" joke an hour before.
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︎ Jun 24 2014
My neighbour with big boobs has been gardening topless all day.
I just wish his wife would do the same.
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︎ Jun 04 2019
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