Now Hell's inky
The Inkredible Hulk.
Turns out wishes just don't come true, sometimes you have to get your feet wet
And I said all I know about fountain pens is the last time I drank from one I got sick.
I don't think it works though... I didn't get any younger. In fact, I got more wrinkly!
He will be mist.
A sans seraph font.
WATER YOU DOING
It's mini soda law.
Bonus joke: where are the trees in Minnesota?
Between da twos and da fours.
It was outside the bathrooms at the mall, right next to the one for adults.
I'm not sure if it works or not.
#***"HI THIRSTY, I'M FRIDAY! COME ON OVER SATURDAY AND WE'LL HAVE A SUNDAE!!"***
Come on Dad, you said it every fucking time and I didn't even get this one until I was like 14. All I wanted was some water, but no, you've gotta be an asshole about it.
One mucks around in fountains....
It can write other words too
Todd was a typical nerdy high schooler, and like most guys, he had a crush on Mary. One day, he got the courage to ask Mary to prom. To his surprise, she said yes. On the day of the prom, Todd had to excuse himself to get a drink. He went to the water fountain, but there was a long line. He then went to the lemonade table, but there was a long line there also. So he turned toward the fruit punch table...
and there was no punchline
I'm just a fountain of knowledge.
It writes lots of other words too.
He said, "Permanent?"
I said, "No, fountain."
When my dad was in high school, he was the manager at a small grocery store. He had a bunch of pranks he would play on newcomers, but this was by far the best one. He would have new people take those 5 gallon water jugs and have them "refill" the water fountains by pouring them into the water fountain drains. While he said most didn't do it, some of the less intelligent people did. He joked about this to me once, and we die of laughter talking about it to this day.
My mom taught me to never make fountains out of foal hills
...but I was told I shouldn't make a fountain out of a Moleskine.
(crossposted to /r/fountainpens)
Bought some pizza slices and while I was filling up my drink from the soda fountain, there was a family of four talking about, of all things, medical professions. The daughter at the table said she thought a proctologist was basically a pervert since they'd be focused on butts all day every day.
The mom explained that you wouldn't call a heart surgeon who uses tools to literally crack open a person's chest cavity and muck around with things a serial killer, so why would you call a doctor who specializes in proctology a pervert?
The dad then chimed in "No that's not right... a serial killer is someone who uses Captain Crunch to murder another person!"
Silence at the table, and the daughter groaned rather loudly. I happened to make eye contact with the dad and just smirked and nodded, which made him beam, and walked out the door to hear him say "Right? Right guys?"
Well done, sir.
I was walking through a hall with my boyfriend when we passed a drinking fountain. I was thirsty so I tried to take a drink but nothing came out. I then noticed a sign on it that said "out of order."
My boyfriend commented "it shouldn't be out of water, the sign says it's only out of order!"
I was working with the 4 yearolds with one of my supervisors. We we're building puzzles when one of the kids walks up to my supervisor.
Kid 1: (Insert supervisor name), I'm thirsty.
Supervisor: Hello Thirsty.
Kid 2: No I think he wants a drink from the water fountain.
Supervisor: Oh is that what Thirsty wants?
Kid 2: Yeah.
Supervisor: Ok go get a drink Thirsty.
My brother and I were driving one day with our dad on a really hot day, it was over 100 degrees. When we drive past a fountain that had two dogs playing in it. He said, "Those dogs were hot dogs and now they're chilly dogs".