A list of puns related to "Funeral"
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
The man stands up and speaks "Plethora." and steps back down.
"Thank you..." says the Widow, "that really means a lot."
EDIT The responses here are incredible! π
I'm not really a mourning person π
Nothing.
Mind if I say a word?" She says: "Please do." The man clears his throat and says: "Plethora."
The widow replies: βThanks that means a lot.β
And another:
Mind if I say a word?" She says: "Please do." The man clears his throat and says: "Bargain."
The widow replies: βThanks that means a great deal.β
It was a nice rehearseal
Because he wanted his friends to see what he dead there.
They were bereavements.
Help usher your roasted beans into the afterlife with CreamMate.
Grab the bouquet from my casket and give it a toss, see who's next.
But that remains go be seen.
People are dying to go there.
People are dying to take a ride in it.
(As told by my friend the funeral director?
"Who's thinking outside the box now Gary?"
Iβm not really a mourning person.
Good mourning
Thots and prayers
>!A decoffinated cafe!<
βMourning Woodβ
She said go ahead.
I stood up said βplethoraβ and sat back down.
βThank youβ, the grieving widow responded, βit means a lotβ
A Graveyard Shift
He lived a good life, it was just too bad he croaked so young.
It was a lovely service...
The man sitting next to her asks, "Do you mind if I say a word?" "Absolutely", she responds. So the man walks up to the podium and clears his throat. "Plethora" he says. Then he comes and sits back down. "Thank you", the woman says. "That means a lot."
Unbereavable...
There wasnβt a dry face in the house.
Of corpse, please come to a dead stop.
Mourn flakes
Who is thinking outside the box now?
Credits to Twitter @Dadsaysjokes
A Huge Grant
I replied, Perhaps mourning would...
There wasn't a dry scalp in the place!
Nothing.
He was sent to a watery grave.
No? Shame, it was real fun.
Jeez, canβt a guy have mourning wood?
What do they call the best salesman at a funeral home?
The Top Urner
"Bargain" the man says.
"Thanks" the woman replies. "That means a great deal."
I'm not really a mourning person.
Who's thinking out of box now Kevin?
I said, plethora. The deceasedβs family said, thanks, that means a lot.
A man leans toward her and asks, "Do you mind if I say a word?" "No, go ahead," replies the woman. The man stands, clears his throat, and says, "Plethora," then sits back down. "Thanks," says the woman, "that means a lot."
I'm really not a mourning person.
People would be dying to get in.
"May I say a word?"
Sniffling, the widow agrees. The old man clears his throat, "Plethora"
"The widow smiles. "Thanks, that means a lot."
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