Flue Puns

A list of puns related to "Flue"

A fly and a flea were trapped in a flue...

“Let’s flee!” Said the fly,

“Let’s fly!” Said the flea,

And they flew through a flaw in the flue...

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👤︎ u/mekkanik
📅︎ Jun 15 2020
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Someone brought a box full of flue dirt to the formal dress gala for the chimney sweepers...

It was quite suity in there!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jul 21 2020
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I pity the flue imgur.com/vRfGUmC
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👤︎ u/fennec3x5
📅︎ Jan 11 2019
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So let me tell you a little about my situation. It's currently about -12°F outside and my HVAC just broke. So, I decided to build a fire, but it turns out I can't use my fireplace because it needs a new flue, and I'm sorry if this is the wrong subreddit for this

but I just need t(w)o vent(s) right now.

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👤︎ u/BuddyEndsleigh
📅︎ Jan 22 2016
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Want to hear a chimney joke?

I Got stacks of em! First one's on the house

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👤︎ u/lolyfe-dc
📅︎ Dec 07 2020
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Did you hear Santa got really sick from going down the chimney?

Yeah, they think he caught the flue.

👍︎ 19
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👤︎ u/AlwaysTheAsshole1234
📅︎ Dec 19 2020
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A fly landed on the edge of a urinal and fell in.

He got pissed off.

👍︎ 3
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👤︎ u/Juevolitos
📅︎ Feb 09 2020
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My friend called an said he was sick of his fireplace exhaust vent...

Sounds like another case of the flue.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Nov 30 2019
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My fireplace felt a little warm today

I think it has a flue.

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👤︎ u/meatbased
📅︎ Jan 19 2019
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I told my wife that our fireplace is sick

Turns out it has the flue.

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👤︎ u/Maimonides_vii
📅︎ Jan 10 2019
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Someone Catapulted a Chimney at me and I don't know why

Flue right over my head

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👤︎ u/tikifire86
📅︎ Dec 11 2018
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What did the old chimney say to the young chimney?

Because I am dying of the flue and will not live much longer, I am now turning over to you this grate responsibility. As a symbol of my blessing, and to make the transfer complete, I therefore pass this mantel to you.

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👤︎ u/Bow_To_Your_Sensei
📅︎ Nov 26 2016
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Just made my first work related dad joke

A coworker of mine is telecommuting today because his daughter has the flue. We have an hour long team meeting today and I figured it'd be a pain for him to call in and sit and listen to a meeting that long while dealing with a sick kid so I let him know he didn't have to dial in but I told him he could if he wanted. Then comes this:

Him: My daughter is asleep at the moment, but I hear her stirring, so I'll probably duck it.

Me: What's she doing cooking if she's that sick?

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/ebadamageplan
📅︎ Mar 13 2015
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Want to hear a chimney joke?

Got stacks of em! First one's on the house

👍︎ 15
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👤︎ u/notdadbot
📅︎ Nov 17 2019
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Pray for my chimney

It has the flue

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👤︎ u/Paul_Has_Arrived
📅︎ Apr 06 2019
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Someone Catapulted a Chimney at me and I don't know why...

Flue right over my head

👍︎ 10
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👤︎ u/tikifire86
📅︎ Aug 01 2018
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