What do you call an expensive car that can flex?

Mercedes-Bends.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pauly_pasqually
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
🚨︎ report
weird flex
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JelKcajiahTie
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Weird flex, but ok
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vincentrainbows
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Flex Seal
πŸ‘︎ 88
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yachtman24
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What does the creator of flex tape run in?

Flex shoes; they make him go Phil Swift!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
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Flex Seal
πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/time4nap
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Weird flex but oh gay
πŸ‘︎ 78
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LivingMemeL0rd69
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Weird FLEX but OK
πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/A1Rocks
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Weird flex but ok
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheUniqueFiness
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Weird flex

The other day my wife went out to the store and bought something. When I got home she immediately started bragging about it to impress me.

Wife: Honey come to the kitchen

Me: ok, what for

Wife: I got something pretty cool (Goes into the kitchen) Me:So what am I looking at

Wife: I got a glass container collection, and its brand name too Plexiglass, isn’t it awesome?

Me: so you wanted to show that off to me?

Me: Weird plex but okay

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Robbie1945
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dinosaur that works out?

A tyrannosaurus-flex

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/beanimus0829
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Flexing my 4 pairs of Ye Zees
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Okakmetito
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
🚨︎ report
What is a seals favorite subject?

Art Art Art Art!!!

πŸ‘︎ 738
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cosmicnate
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Quick Pun-flexes imgur.com/2WgKKNe
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Migrane
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Weirdgardium Flexiosa
πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/glorious_bangla
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I wondered if I’d ever have the strength to hold things together like I used to

I’m a frayed knot

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/psykotic24
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
His fate is sealed
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KnightAngelic
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
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Money Lisa
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TibiaChi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Every morning after I wake up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of junk to Ikea.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report
I flexed my glutes and got a cramp.

That was a pain in the butt.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2018
🚨︎ report
If Google released a really expensive watch

Buying one would be a Google flex

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/calendar_cable
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between a tuna, a piano and a glue stick?

You can tuna piano but you can’t piano a tuna.

πŸ‘︎ 805
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πŸ‘€︎ u/daddycrispy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2018
🚨︎ report
A man bragged that his bicep looks state of Oklahoma.

Weird flex, but OK.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ClayDevil
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I always see this really buff sea doggo at my local gym...

He's called Flex Seal.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stick_in_the_mud_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
🚨︎ report
You know how Moses makes his coffee?

Hebrews it. Ha!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rasberryjam5151
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
How do fish impress the ladies?

They flex their mussels.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Azreal_Mistwalker
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the dragon say to the office worker?

You're fired!

Credit my 9 year old son, flexing being a dad early.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZombieDR
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Does anyone know good puns for the name Lexie??? Or lex?
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
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My Son asked if I wanted a book about Social Media

I told him: β€œNo thanks I already Reddit”

πŸ‘︎ 70
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Orbit89
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2018
🚨︎ report
A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night.

Oof.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stormtrooper-85
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know a good veterinarian?

::Lifts up arms and flexes muscles::

Because these puppies are sick.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MacItaly
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dinosaur who goes to the gym?

A T-flex

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dinosaur who always brags about how rich he is?

A Tyrannosaurus-Flex.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2018
🚨︎ report
I read earlier that the zoo was installing an exercise equipment addition to the marine mammal exhibit to help make the animals stronger.

They're going to have a bunch of flex seals on their hands.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SchitzPopinov719
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2019
🚨︎ report
After an intense session at the gym, I asked my personal trainer what was the best way to show off my new muscles.

He told me to hang upside down from a tree branch and curl my arms behind my back.

I said β€œweird flex but OK”

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/procrastiprov
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
🚨︎ report
My dad told me he had to go to the vet.

I was 14 or something I just got off of school so I'm sitting on the couch as per usual and my dad walks in looking stressed the fuck out. "Hey, I think I gotta go to the vet..." I start slightly panicking but I'm curious so I ask, "why?" He proceeds to give me direct eye contact, flex his muscles and say, "CAUSE THESE PUPPIES ARE SICK!!!" then walks out of the room, proud as can fucking be.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BortyBoy
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Today I met a dinosaur that likes to brag a lot

He was a tyrannosaurus flex

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Phil Swift had a Christmas Party

He calls it Flex Seal Navidad

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Mariposa5487
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
🚨︎ report
What is it called when youre double jointed?

Bi-flex-ual

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pidgetha
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2018
🚨︎ report
I have to go to the veterinarian soon...

Because these pythons are sick!!

*Flexes arms

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/swaggerhound3000
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I almost got into a fight with a bendy straw.

When I put it in my drink, it tried to flex on me.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NobodyWhatsoever
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2018
🚨︎ report
What is a fisher doing in the gym?

He flexes his mussels.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrayonFox
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2017
🚨︎ report

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