Multiple thefts of porch steps from different addresses in downtown Detroit.

Top Detectives have been assigned to the stair case.

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👤︎ u/Team_Pineapple
📅︎ Jan 03
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Police report says someone was stealing rockwool from a construction site downtown.

Turns out it was an isolated incident.

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👤︎ u/Reddnvb
📅︎ Sep 22 2020
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What should you do if you're walking downtown and you happen to pass a Fireman?

I'd put it out, man.

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👤︎ u/professorf
📅︎ Sep 02 2020
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I just read that a tiger was spotted downtown

I don't really believe it though, if it was spotted its probably a leopard.

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👤︎ u/TheTaxman_cometh
📅︎ Aug 08 2020
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What do you call a potato that heads downtown to start a riot?

An agi-tater!

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👤︎ u/Sir_Pluses
📅︎ Jun 08 2020
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The sporting goods store downtown was having a big sale on canoe paddles, but traffic and road construction made it real pain to get there...

...yeah, it was quite the ordeal to get the oar deal.

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👤︎ u/KW-DadJoker
📅︎ Aug 08 2020
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Earlier today, I witnessed a kid napping downtown where I work...

...but I just let him sleep. Didn’t seem right to bother the boy.

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👤︎ u/jaymb90
📅︎ Jun 21 2020
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Found this walking around downtown Indianapolis yesterday.
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👤︎ u/themarajade1
📅︎ Oct 07 2019
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I went to the boomerang shop downtown to look at their selection today.

Turns out they have a great return policy.

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👤︎ u/JustMy2Coppers
📅︎ Jan 24 2020
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Found this gem downtown near my job.
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👤︎ u/romir38
📅︎ Jul 13 2019
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They opened up a new hotel downtown called The Clitoris.

It only has one star though, nobody is able to find it.

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👤︎ u/shinywetangel
📅︎ Dec 01 2019
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I was walking around downtown when I came across a furry convention

I was surprised to see the number of people in the quwue

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👤︎ u/__Orion___
📅︎ Feb 14 2019
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I got the roast duck at a fancy tapas place downtown...

Boy, the duck might have been small but its bill sure was big.

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👤︎ u/ShirtyManhole
📅︎ May 14 2019
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"I saw a kidnapping downtown!"

"what'd you do?!" "I woke him up."

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👤︎ u/Lil_Cr33py
📅︎ Sep 10 2013
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Did you hear about the litter of kittens that escaped into downtown?

It was a cat-astrophe.

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👤︎ u/SavageTimmy
📅︎ Feb 06 2017
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I got stuck in traffic in downtown today.

It was a pretty city situation.

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👤︎ u/takeonme85
📅︎ May 02 2018
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My dad and I were walking downtown today having a heart to heart when he spanked a statue, turned to me and said....

"....Son....... I've just hit rock bottom."

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👤︎ u/SoDakZak
📅︎ Jul 05 2017
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Hundreds of chick peas were found dead downtown this morning...

Police are calling it a hummuscide.

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👤︎ u/instacarp
📅︎ Sep 14 2017
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I was in the bank earlier and the woman behind the counter started singing, "Downtown."

I thought to myself, "What a peculiar clerk."

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Jan 05 2018
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Wife mentioned there was a produce warehouse on fire near downtown.

I said, "Well, guess they didn't stock enough watermelon." She refuses to talk to me now...

 

Link: http://www.nbcdfw.com/news/local/Smoke-Seen-for-Miles-from-Fire-near-Downtown-Dallas-422199263.html

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👤︎ u/BloodMC
📅︎ May 14 2017
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There's a bar called Church downtown Boston

Yesterday (Saturday) walking around the city

Me: Where do you wanna eat?

Her: We could go to Church

Me: Church is only open on Sundays

She hit me, that means it was a success right?

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👤︎ u/eaglessoar
📅︎ Jan 18 2015
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Every time walking through Downtown Disney...

...my friend and I would pass La Brea Bakery.

"Looks like they forgot the D."

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👤︎ u/CrimsonKing1990
📅︎ Aug 27 2015
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I was thinking about taking my bike downtown this weekend...

I'm just not sure its frame can handle bars :/

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👤︎ u/dafrizzy
📅︎ Jun 06 2016
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This weekend my dad came to visit. We walked by a yoga studio downtown....

Then in the middle of our conversation he stops. "I know this is a little off topic but I really need to know something." "Sure Dad, what's up?" "What kind of detergent do you use to get out a Namastain?" cue daughterly groan

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👤︎ u/Dagnythedoodle
📅︎ Apr 18 2015
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My father in law swished this from downtown.

My mother in law was choosing me for leaving my breakfast utensils and drink on the table.

Her husband smirked, "Yeah, get your FORK AND coffee and get outta here!"

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👤︎ u/tanman1975
📅︎ Apr 25 2015
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