Need help digging a hole.

The last guy ditched out on me.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/XxDorrianxX
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
🚨︎ report
I pulled a muscle digging for gold....

no worries though, it's just a miner injury.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Digging holes is not fun, but making them even bigger is even worse.

It's just boring.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zipflop
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Digging himself a deeper hole
πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RogueDisciple
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Archeologists will be digging for a lost village near my home. I hope they find some signs of life.

Remains to be seen

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/timthedriller
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Just keep digging, just keep digging
πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/halabadushkeys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
🚨︎ report
When I was digging through the wardrobe on the weekend, I managed to find a present for the kids that I wrapped in a box last year and forgot to give them. Bargain

Can't wait to see their faces when they realize they have a puppy.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/runew0lf
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a situation when you don't feel like digging holes anymore?

Bored to bore

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/saswata1194
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
🚨︎ report
A child was slightly injured while digging for gold

Not to worry, only Minor Miner Injuries

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend was explaining at length about how he was digging holes in his back yard for water.

He was boring.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what I said after digging a hole and finding water?

Well done!

πŸ‘︎ 68
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/theRiverknows86
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I was having problems with my tools while digging for gold.

They were miner technical difficulties.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/beyond_hate
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Yesterday, I was digging in the garden when I found a buried treasure chest!

I ran inside to tell my wife, but then I remembered why I was digging in the garden...

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KittenWarlord87
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is Grave digging such a dangerous job?

Because they have one foot in the grave.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SteaminScaldren
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
🚨︎ report
An American spy is in Soviet Russia, digging up information on a powerful Russian politician. He finds him in a bar, walks in dressed in Russian attire, pretending to be Russian. Everybody in the bar looks at him, but he keeps his cool. He orders a drink and walks to the politician...

"Greetings, comrade." says the spy, but before he could finish his sentence, the Russian says, "I think you are American spy."

The spy is alarmed, but being a skilled, trained, spy, he says, "That is not true! I am the proudest Soviet there is! I can sing the anthem more beautifully than any other man in the country!"

He then proceeds to sing the Soviet anthem, so melodically and beautifully, that everybody in the bar cheers.

"Very good, very good!" says the politician. "But I still think you are spy."

The man continues to keep his cool.

"I am a historian! I can tell you everything about this glorious country!"

He then spends about two hours recounting the Revolution, the Great Patriotic War, about how superior to the Russia is in terms of technology compared to America and makes a great argument about how communism is beneficial to society.

"Amazing! You are skilled!" says the politician.

The spy smirks.

"But I still think you American spy."

The spy is getting frustrated, but still unfazed.

He replies, "I am good drinker, a true Russian! Let us drink, and see who can come out top!"

The bar turns its attention to the politician and the spy, who are now in a drinking contest.

The bartender serves drink after drink of vodka.

After about an hour of drinking, the politician nearly passes out, unable to hold as much liquor as the spy, to a resounding cheer amongst the bar.

In the midst of the cheering, the Russian politician gets up, smiling, and in a slurred speech, repeats, "You are good, you are good... but I still think you are spy."

The American spy, piss drunk, loses his skill and gives up.

"Okay, you got me. I am an American. But what made you think that way, after all this time?"

The Russian politician replies, "There aren't many black people in Russia."

πŸ‘︎ 89
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Archaeologist digging in a Pyramid in Egypt have found a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts

Experts believe it to be Pharaoh Roche

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Christopher1295
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was the miner so determined to complete digging on a second plot of land?

Because he had one tract mined.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EurassesDragon
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
🚨︎ report
3 moles are digging their way out of prison.

The first mole says β€œI can smell the clean air and grass! We’re almost there!”

The second mole says β€œI can smell the fresh wet dirt! We’re almost there!”

The third mole says β€œReally? All I can smell is molasses.”

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chloeruel
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Two guys are digging holes

One says to the other "Time flies." The second guy replies "Can't, they're too fast"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dark_Reunion_405
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Im really digging my bass
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/invigibleman
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Digging deep into the database
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jellybear421
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Let’s start digging at the crack of dawn!
πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2018
🚨︎ report
People say that digging holes can be fun.

...but I think it's really boring.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ATShields934
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2019
🚨︎ report
My job is digging holes to look for water

It is, well, boring.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rc538
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the man say after digging three holes?

"Well, well, well..."

My dads favorite joke. Hopefully it hasn't been done before. Xpost from r/jokes

πŸ‘︎ 352
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jigbaa
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2015
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about digging?

Never mine, it’s too deep for a dad joke.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RedditingDino
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you stop a mole from digging holes in your lawn?

Take away his shovel

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/glynnwlynn
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2019
🚨︎ report
My son was in the garden, digging a hole. I thought he would get bored and stop but he kept digging until he hit water.

I’ve taught him well.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jaggington
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2018
🚨︎ report
I caught a bunch of social justice warriors in my yard digging up large wooden stakes

They said the posts had to be removed before they caused a fence

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PoorKidstoys
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2018
🚨︎ report
How do you stop a new puppy from digging up your lawn?

Hide its shovel

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/billy_tables
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Nobody is talking about Elon Musk's tunnel digging enterprise, The Boring Company...

It's not very interesting

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/royaj77
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2018
🚨︎ report
A Frenchman was frustrated after digging a deep hole only to have it fill with water.

"Eau well!" he exclaimed.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mayo_Spouse
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Medieval code of honor for digging

Shovelry!!!

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mftuchman
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2017
🚨︎ report
My friends are digging a hole in the ground to get water out of.

So I sent them a 'Get well' card.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2016
🚨︎ report
Why was the snowman digging through a bag of carrots?

No one knows

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ZeHeadBanger
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2017
🚨︎ report
Digging a foundation with my pops

"Harder than a honeymoon dick"

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/deBeerlax
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2013
🚨︎ report
A squirrel was digging in the ground.

After a little while he finds something. Another squirrel sees he has found something so he approaches. This squirrel is acting really crazy, shaking and talking super fast. He asks "hey man, hey, hey what did you find?" The squirrel that was digging looks over and says "Your nuts!"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/musicmanjams
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2014
🚨︎ report
I pulled a muscle digging for gold.

It was just a miner injury.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rmath12
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
🚨︎ report
I pulled a muscle while digging up gold

It's just a miner injury

πŸ‘︎ 110
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/crimsonangel68
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
🚨︎ report
I pulled a muscle while I was digging for gold.

Just a miner injury.

πŸ‘︎ 157
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DiosMioMan2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
🚨︎ report
I pulled a muscle digging for gold

Just a miner injury

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I pulled a muscle digging for gold

Just a miner injury!!

πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Whlightning
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins.

I was about to run inside and tell my wife about it, and then I remembered why I was digging in our garden

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a child digging?

A minor miner

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Garfunkle0707
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I bumped my elbow digging for gold.

It was a miner injury.

πŸ‘︎ 104
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotter66
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins and was about to run straight home to tell my wife

Then I remembered why I was digging the hole in the first place.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/uglyric
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Archaeologists digging in a pyramid in Egypt have found a mummy covered in chocolate and hazelnuts...

They believe it is Pharaoh Rocher...

πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/aabesh
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2018
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.