The pessimist sees a dark tunnel. The optimist sees a light at the end of the tunnel. The realist sees a freight train.

The train driver sees three idiots standing on the tracks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/firestrike007
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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An old man was driving his carpool through a tunnel and he said,

"These are the carpool tunnels."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/XPSU
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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My carpal tunnel syndrome is acting up

It could all be fixed with a simple tendon transplant, but the surgery is so expensive, and I'm really worried about going under the knife. I guess it's just not a wrist I'm willing to take.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fuzzus628
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2020
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I have an exciting new job as an explosives engineer blowing up mountains for tunnels and roads.

It's Groundbreaking work.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/A_Zenchi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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Carpool Tunnel

...just might fix this dang traffic problem we're having

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MyLatestInvention
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
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My wrists are killing me from driving my coworkers everyday through tunnels and traffic.

Dr. Says I have a bad case of car pool tunnel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zaxxonn26
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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Recently, I've resigned from my position as a tunnel drill operator.

The job was boring.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/b3rkath
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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Prisoner tunnels out of jail and emerges in a school playground shouting β€œI’m free”!

Little girl walks up and shouts β€œI’m four!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigpapastu
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
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My friend wanted to dig an underground tunnel, I told him...

Gopher it

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πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
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So, I was on the train the other day, and you know how it takes a while to get to the city, well my phone battery was flat and I didn't have a book, so I was a bit bored, but then I realised that there is all this cool graffiti on the tunnel walls... and um... so my phone was dead... and.. the city?

Oh darn it! I lost my train of thought.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tyrannosaur85
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2020
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I freak out when I go through a tunnel, but only when someone else is driving.

Doctor says I have carpool tunnel syndrome.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/frinxo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
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I have a fear of driving through tunnels with multiple people in the car

Doc said it's Carpool Tunnel Syndrome

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andrewmathman17
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
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My wrists hurt whenever I drive to work with my co-workers and we go through a tunnel.

I think it's carpool tunnel syndrome.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
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What do you call tunnels in the Phillipines?

Fallopian Tubes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TraditionSmashed
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2019
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Did you hear about the tunnel that makes you illiterate?

Don’t read too much into it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Torley_
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2019
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Studies show when car-pooling, when going through a tunnel, people who sit in the back are shown to experience more anxiety.

Scientists call it "car-pool tunnel syndrome"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeNooNinja
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2018
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I had to leave my job excavating tunnels

It was boring

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πŸ‘€︎ u/confibulator
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2017
🚨︎ report
When making new tunnels on the western plain, prairie dogs get help

The hole family pitches in

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2018
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When I'm driving through tunnels, I don't like using the carpool lane...

I'm afraid of carpool tunnel

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Salbabida_Boy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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Driving through the harbour tunnel in Baltimore, I asked my kids to tell me if they see anything interesting in the tunnel...

They said there was nothing interesting, just tiles and other cars. I said that's because the tunnel is "bored".

They didn't get it. I told them you have to dig deep for that one.

Eventually they got it, and told me to stop telling bad jokes. I wanted to see how low I could go.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bcjgreen
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2015
🚨︎ report
Was playing Astroneer and found myself wishing I had some way I could make bigger tunnels easier...

But that'd be boring.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zer01201
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2017
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My wife is going in for carpal tunnel surgery today...

... so I'm taking the day off to give her a hand :D. (Actually happening. Wish us luck!!)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dakkonfire
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2017
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the one about the guy who quit his job as a tunnel excavator?

He thought the work was boring.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SugarBear4Real
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2014
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Nobody is talking about Elon Musk's tunnel digging enterprise, The Boring Company...

It's not very interesting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/royaj77
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2018
🚨︎ report
Tom Hanks walked into a wind tunnel.

The wind tunnel says to him "It's a pleasure to meet you Mr Hanks, I'm a huge fan."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fhoxyd22
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2017
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I bought a used wind tunnel for really cheap but underestimated the strength of the fans.

It blew me away.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheSygil
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Why was the tunnel always getting into trouble?

Because it was bored.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thegreatgazoo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Here comes the tunnel.

Had the 3 kids in the back of the car while we were on the freeway in the carpool lane. As we entered a tunnel I started screaming and as we exited the tunnel I stopped. The kids all stared at me and I very calmly explained that I had carpool tunnel syndrome. Lots of rolling eyes after that.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/loomdog1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2015
🚨︎ report
Atlanta Names Tunnel-Boring Machine β€œDriller Mike” After Killer Mike stereogum.com/1900475/atl…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRealCalypso
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2016
🚨︎ report
When trying to find out where the tunnels are on a trip?

Me: Where are the tunnels between here and Philly?

Dad: Under the Mountains

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Frosted_Chode
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2014
🚨︎ report
What do they call a traffic jam in the Lincoln Tunnel?

A Linkin Park

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthracite4
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2017
🚨︎ report
My dad recently went in for carpal tunnel surgery.

Before the doctors put him under, he asked "Will I be able to play the violin after this surgery?"

The doctors said, "Of course."

He replies, "Good, because I couldn't play it before."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Midget_Slap
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2013
🚨︎ report
Who's in charge of the militarised tunnel bore?

A drill sgt.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rodevilfred
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2015
🚨︎ report

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