The most important part of a mail pun, is the delivery.
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︎ Apr 20 2021
Why is childbirth called delivery?
Shouldn't it be called take out?
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︎ Apr 24 2021
Why do we call childbirth delivery?
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︎ May 18 2021
Why is child birth called delivery?
Shouldn't it be take out?
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︎ May 13 2021
โSorry Harry, unfortunately we have to cancel your Vietnamese food deliveryโ
Harry Potter and the Order of the Pho Nix.
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︎ Apr 06 2021
what food delivery service is the most popular with insects?
Grub hub
(please don't shoot me)
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︎ Apr 10 2021
I purchased a new kitchen sink and the delivery man never told me he left in on my doorstep. Sat there all day
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︎ Mar 04 2021
It's not delivery...
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︎ Feb 11 2021
The secret behind a dad joke is in the delivery
Is what the mailman keeps telling my son.
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︎ Jan 23 2021
I think we made a mistake when we started calling childbirth โdeliveryโ.
It should have been called takeout instead.
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︎ Jan 06 2021
Had an unexpected delivery turn up at our house earlier, 2700 bananas.
Tonight, we eat like kongs.
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︎ Dec 29 2020
What do you call a really bad freight delivery service?
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︎ Feb 16 2021
Why was the delivery driver forced to wear glasses?
Because everyone wanted contact-less delivery.
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︎ Feb 04 2021
The bathroom fixtures delivery man is here, honey!
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︎ Jan 05 2021
Social distancing has led to Hooters offering delivery to your door.
Theyโre changing their name to Knockers.
๐︎ 8k
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︎ Apr 27 2020
During the delivery of my first child, my wife kept yelling out โcanโtโ, โwonโtโ, โshouldnโtโ, โcouldnโtโ.
The mid wife told me not to worry, they were only contractions
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︎ Nov 27 2020
I really hope Santa can figure out how to make all his deliveries this year due to Covid-19......
I hear he just ran out of santa-tizer
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︎ Dec 14 2020
An IKEA-delivery guy walks into a restaurant.
The waiter goes: That's not my table.
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︎ Jan 14 2021
After checking the delivery tracking app, my wife yelled in a fit of rage, โnow my package isnโt coming for another 5 days!โ
I replied, now you know how I feel.
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︎ Aug 02 2020
Deliveries rollout
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︎ Jan 21 2020
My daughter's birth wasn't a delivery...
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︎ Nov 11 2020
I've recently become a delivery driver
yes, it has it's UPS and downs, but I still love it
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︎ Dec 07 2020
Did you hear that U.S. Mail is starting a freight delivery service to compete with FedEx and UPS?
Itโs called โS Cargoโ.
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︎ Nov 11 2020
Did you hear that the Indian restaurant hired a new delivery guy?
Heโs a top-notch curry-er.
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︎ Oct 16 2020
The delivery guy threw my pizza at me.
Apparently I ordered uber yeets
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︎ Oct 30 2020
The doctor told me I probably wonโt be able to walk again after getting into an accident with a newspaper delivery truck.
I was crushed by the news.
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︎ Jul 01 2020
A whole new meaning to delivery...
๐︎ 5k
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︎ Aug 13 2019
Iโm a delivery driver that delivers bread products, whilst on my round today a gentleman dropped this on me.....โlooks like you have the best jobโ he says, โwhy is that?โ I ask, because you must be loaded with dough!!!
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︎ Aug 06 2020
Pizza Hut employee: โWould you like a contactless delivery?
Yes, Iโd prefer they wear glasses.
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︎ Oct 23 2020
How does Harry Potter makeout with the delivery lady?
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︎ Aug 20 2020
Santa got Coronavirus this year so Mrs Claus had to take over toy production, orders, and present deliveries.
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︎ Oct 01 2020
My wife ordered one of those new heavy blankets off Amazon but delivery took forever...
She says it was worth the weight.
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︎ Sep 02 2020
What do you call a delivery driver who exclusively works with Indian restaurants?
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︎ Jun 01 2020
Did you hear about Hootersโ new contactless delivery service?
For a while it was knockers, but now itโs just honkers
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︎ Aug 10 2020
The delivery guy accidentally got us 3 extra bags of flour
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︎ Aug 20 2020
Ever since the pandemic started, Iโve been wondering why my food delivery drivers have all been wearing glasses.
I had forgotten that contactless delivery was required.
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︎ Jun 26 2020
When Mary had a little lamb, the labor and delivery doctor was surprised...
When Old MacDonald had a farm, the doctor died of shock.
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︎ Sep 02 2020
Pregnancy puns, it's all about the delivery...
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︎ May 08 2020
What did the ninja delivery boy say to the office manager when he was delivering an unexpected order of pens, pencils, and paper goods?
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︎ Aug 19 2020
When an Amazon employee takes maternity leave, are they out for delivery?
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︎ Aug 25 2019
Birth control should be the actual name used for delivery
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︎ May 06 2020
Our grocery delivery driver told us one of the milk cartons got damaged and leaked into the bag.
My 15yr old son picked up the first bag, which had a long vegetable sticking out and said "I've found the leek, dad."
Proud dad moment.
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︎ Jun 13 2020
I just saw a AAA battery-delivery truck run a red light. Hope he doesn't get charged.
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︎ Jan 13 2020
Regular Delivery!
My job is transporting envelopes and packages from place to place, but I'm not sure I want to make it a courier.
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︎ Jul 23 2020
Did you know that Matthew McConaughey helped design the delivery route software for UPS?
Thereโs no left turns so itโs alright alright alright.
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︎ Jul 05 2020
I think itโs weird that we call childbirth delivery.
It should have been called takeout instead.
๐︎ 12k
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︎ Sep 15 2019
I think it was a mistake to call childbirth โdeliveryโ.
It should have been called takeout instead.
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︎ Aug 21 2020
I think it was a mistake to call childbirth โdeliveryโ.
It should have been called โtakeoutโ instead.
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︎ May 18 2020
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