Why was the delivery driver forced to wear glasses?

Because everyone wanted contact-less delivery.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Yoit
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I've recently become a delivery driver

yes, it has it's UPS and downs, but I still love it

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Wallet_Insp3ctor
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I’m a delivery driver that delivers bread products, whilst on my round today a gentleman dropped this on me.....”looks like you have the best job” he says, β€œwhy is that?” I ask, because you must be loaded with dough!!!

True dad that man!!

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bunny_2121
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a delivery driver who exclusively works with Indian restaurants?

A curryer.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/phatbatt
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Ever since the pandemic started, I’ve been wondering why my food delivery drivers have all been wearing glasses.

I had forgotten that contactless delivery was required.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/A-T-P
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I caught my delivery driver dropping a turd in my yard today.

When asked to leave a review I gave him a number 2

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Micktheprivz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Our grocery delivery driver told us one of the milk cartons got damaged and leaked into the bag.

My 15yr old son picked up the first bag, which had a long vegetable sticking out and said "I've found the leek, dad."

Proud dad moment.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a doctor who became a delivery driver?

MedEx

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nomekop777
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
🚨︎ report
OK here goes: who is the Voodoo god of delivery drivers?

Baron Sameday

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tillmonkey
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm studying to become a delivery driver.

Hopefully I parcel the exams.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Delivery driver asked me what time it is.

Somewhere between 8:00am and 5:30pm, I replied.

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/woyteck
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2017
🚨︎ report
You know what drives everybody's nuts...

Nut delivery drivers

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/maccer20
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
🚨︎ report
My neighbors just got sent a suit of armour but they weren't home when it arrived.

I told the delivery driver that they must have gone out for the Knight.

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Arctikavanian
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I just sold my car and this was my add

Hi Folks, If you are a linguist then I am selling your dream car! I’m selling an Accent, a 2004 Hyundai Accent to be precise. Even if you don’t know a bunch of languages, this car is still great for you.

Just like me, it’s been around the birthday block a few times, but there’s still lots of life left in both of us, I guarantee! If you are looking for the perfect body, seek out a surgeon. If you’re looking for a car that will love you just the way you are, this is it. Now I know what you’re thinking, β€œI bet this is a junker”, but you’d be wrong. Next to my wife this is the best body I’ve ever had my hands on.

What’s wrong with it mechanically you ask? Nothing! It drives great, A/C & heat still work like a dream, breaks work, transmission shifts good, and the 1.6L engine runs great. With its age, the engine has had some parts replaced. All the belts have recently been changed, that happens with age as I just went up a few sizes myself. The washer fluid pump has been changed because it’s important to be able to have a good cry once in a while. I did an oil change in the summer and depending on how long it takes for this car to finds it’s new match, I will do another in the next month or so.

Since beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I’ll give you a run down of what the interior is like. It’s what’s on the inside that matters anyway right? I am the 3rd owner of this car and the previous owner was a smoker. I don’t believe there is a cigarette smell anymore but the cloth seats do have little holes in them. I mean hey, when you play with fire you get burnt right? The stereo head unit has been replaced with a modern Pioneer as the original just wasn’t in tune with my musical needs as a Dj. The only real problem this pretty young thing has is the passenger rear seatbelt does not retract. Since I have two mini controllers I taxi around, I’ve had car seats in the back and have had no reason to replace the seatbelt yet. A new one is only a cool $250 from Hyundai but will take some time for delivery. There are still 4 working seatbelts in the car so if you’re traveling with another couple, I’m sure they’ll love to cuddle up in the middle and behind you, the driver.

The trunk is spacious enough for the average trunk but just doesn’t work out so well for hauling Dj gear. The rear seats fold as easy a poker player having their bluff called, so it will give you extra room. Not much more that I can think of to tell you about but take a look at the plethora of p

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DjBWren
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2017
🚨︎ report
Delivery dad joke

My roommate and I are ordering some Chinese food for delivery.

She asks "what's a good tip for a delivery driver"

I reply "always wear a seat belt"

She won't talk to me now.

πŸ‘︎ 380
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/grease_cat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2014
🚨︎ report
Where's the ice cream?

I work as a delivery driver for an industrial supply company, and today I was delivering some pylons to a client. I walked inside and found the nearest person to ask them for a verification signature for the delivery. I walked up to a man I recognized as the dad of one of my high school friends. He looked at me with a shit-eating grin and said "Where's the ice cream?" I looked at him, totally confused. "What?" I said. "Where's the ice cream?" he repeated. I stared at him with a blank look hoping he'd explain himself. Then he looked at the pylons I was delivering and said "Well, you brought the cones, so where's the ice cream?"

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.