Was it the latter or the former?
The evidence was DAMning
The police are searching high and low for the culprits.
They’re looking for the culprits, but they have nothing to go on.
The culprit, a crazed 34 year old Dentist name Michael. When asked why he did it said: "I just really hate plaque."
The culprit was quickly found so you could say it was a very brief case.
The culprit made a clean get away
I heard the culprit was another nun.
It must have been a nunja practicing with nun-chucks.
The culprit took all the lute
One day a man looks out his window and finds one of his fence posts dug up and put in the ground somewhere else.
For the next couple of days this continues on but with a new fence post.
Yesterday was the last straw, so the men sat on his balcony all night to see who the culprit was.
Sure enough at 2am a couple of teenagers show up and get ready to dig up another fence post.
Man: "you goddamn teenagers! Stop digging up old posts and reposting them!"
GF: Don't you want to go check why the pantry door isn't closing.
Me: Wander over to the pantry, look inside, and spot the culprit immediately.
GF: So what was the problem?
Me: Slowly take the tin of jam out, and while grinning like an idiot, I look at her and say: Looks like the door had been jammed.
GF: Sighs and rolls her eyes.
They're fairly certain the culprit is an incider.
They say the police are trying to weed out the culprit.
The culprits left no tracks
Last week, I took my friends to my parents house at the beach for a couple days for fun vacation times. One of my friends bought a box of cheerwine krispy kreme doughnuts, but one of the tasty morsels mysteriously disappeared in the night. The day after, we discussed the culprit options. One person said "maybe it was your dad," another said "maybe it was your mom," and I said "or maybe it was one of us.." A couple seconds of silence passed, then I had the biggest pun eureka moment in which I excitedly chortled, "Man, this is a real WHODOUGHNUT!!!"
I wasn't feeling well and I suspected some intestinal blockage to be the culprit. Naturally, I made an appointment with my doctor. I'm in the treatment room waiting when he comes in.
Doc: Not feeling well huh? What do you think it is?
Me: I'm not sure but I've had weird bowel movements I think it's blockage
Doc: I don't believe you
Me: wut
Doc: you're lying to me
Me: no seriously doc I'm blocked up here
Doc: I know, you're full of shit
