Even crime has time for puns (credit to the author, extrafabulouscomics)
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
Unidentified male charged with two completely different crimes in the produce aisle.
Son: “What crime would I be charged with if I broke into the Capitol and planted a forest?”
Dad: “Well I’m no legal expert, but I suspect there’d be some trees in there.”
What happened when the leader of Russia committed a crime?
A mime is the perfect partner in crime
What happens after an alligator commits a crime?
As the detective examined the crime scene at the carnival he came upon the man working the “Guess your weight” booth. The detective had the man arrested as an accomplice to the criminal.
He was charged with helping the criminal get a weigh.
Why are crimes in the 'Deep South' so hard to solve?
There's no dental records & all the DNA matches...
My left knee has never committed a crime.
I can’t say the same for his felony.
What crime fighting duo hangs out at the noodle shop?
If you see a crime at the Apple Store...
Does that make you a an iWitness
Its a good thing sexual innuendos isn't a crime...
I'd definitely be going down.
What do you call a bird that has committed a crime?
We all have heard about Joker. The Clown Prince of Crime.
But have you heard about his father who was Joking.
A man asks a police officer if it’s a crime to throw sodium chloride in someone’s eyes
Officer: “Yes, that’s assault!”
Man: “I know it’s a salt, but is it a crime?”
Whats the worst crime to occur at a fish market?
What crime did a test commit?
It didn't commit a crime, the teacher just told me to turn it in.
What do you call a mediocre member of organized crime?
Whats the name of a crime series filmed on a sunny japanese island?
The police officer made me pay up for my crime.
When is it a crime to just lie there?
The police show up on a crime scene
They walk in and see a man standing over a body with a broken neck. So they take the man into questioning and ask him why he did it, the man said
“It was a snap decision”
Lawyer - Is it crime to throw salt in someone's eyes?
Judge - Yes, that's assault!
Lawyer - I know it's a salt but is it a crime?
Apparently there was a crime that happened on the airplane that led to the plane crashing into the ocean.
The police are trying to investigate to figure out how it all went down.
What do you call a guinea pig that partakes in organized crime?
Schrodinger’s Cat has committed unforgivable crimes.
He is wanted dead and alive.
In the history of crime literature, which character has been the most effective at getting people out of prison?
The dot "."
It has ended more sentences than anything else.
prostitution is a thot crime.
inviting several prostitutes to the same party is gathering your thots.
Crime on multi storey car parks.
An avocado thief was caught committing a crime...
I heard they tried to get away ,but they didn’t av a car doe...
Just found this store by chance called Ollie’s. Aside from all the great liquidation sales, the walls are a pun gold mine! I felt it be a crime not to post pictures of it on here.
reddit.com/gallery/iij3ts
What kind of house do ninja turtles live in when they go on vacation from living in the sewers and fighting crime?
Why is a minnow always the first suspect for a crime?
Because he's always a little fishy
What does Venom use to commit crimes online?
What do you call a crime fighting dog that can swim underwater?
What do you call an alligator trying to solve a crime?
I was robbed outside and went in to report the crime. When I walked in, someone asked me what it was like outside.
I said, “it’s a bit muggy.”
How do Tree crime investigators start their investigation
They go to the ROOT of the problem
Judge: I hereby find you guilty for all crimes you have been charged with. For sentencing I order you to spend life behind bars without possibility of parole
Criminal: That's a long sentence, I demand a shorter one.
Judge: U did it. Go 2 jail forever.
Is it a crime to throw NaCl on someone's eyes?
It's assault
I know it's a salt but is it a crime?
It’s actually a crime to throw sodium chloride at someone.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime?
I think they just ransomware.
Me: Is it a crime to throw sodium chloride in your enemy's eyes?
Person: Yes, that's assault.
Me: Yes I know it's a salt, but is it a crime?
If you see a crime at an apple store....
Does that make you an iWitness
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