Deep very deep.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/viky_boy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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What do you call food that preaches the Bible?

Billy Graham cracker.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/humanlikeyou07
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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Went to cracker barrel yesterday for lunch with my dad and we got their new signature fried chicken

The waitress gave us our food and he started looking the pieces over really intently. He turned them all over and checked every side.

Waitress: is everything okay sir? Dad: No i think something's wrong with my chicken. (Looking at the pieces for a second time) Waitress: I'm sorry, what's wrong? Dad: I don't think they signed my chicken.

I lost it.

Happy Fathers day weekend!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rofsdraw
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
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The definition of food racism

Calling a white person a cracker

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BillytheFailure
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2019
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Family was talking about food allergies...

Mom: And maya had some...

Me: weird gluten free crackers?

Mom: is she gluten free?

Me: no, I think she's nuts.

Dad: it's not nice to call people nuts. Call them crazy!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Byerlyduck1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2014
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My mom pulled the best dad joke I've ever heard at a Chinese restaurant the other day

Her friend had come along with us to the buffet and was eating something that I can't quite remember now, but she ends up asking "where is the duck sauce?" To which my mom, without even skipping a beat, blurted out the following words with not a single emotion on her face, "probably next to the quackers". I almost choked on my food I was laughing so hard. Love you mom

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deal_The_Man
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2014
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My dad just did this...

My mom and I were in our living room watching TV. My dad was in the kitchen by himself. Suddenly we hear a yell from the kitchen and go running in to see my dad with a bloody paper towel around his finger...

Me: What happened!?

Dad: I cut my finger!

Mom: How!?

Dad: I wanted some cheese and crackers so I reached into the cheese drawer and I cut my hand.

Me: How did the cheese drawer cut your hand?

Dad: It didn't. I sliced it on the block of extra sharp cheddar!

Dad bursts out laughing

He then removed the paper towel to reveal his unharmed finger. He had dyed the paper towel with food coloring.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pbs094
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2013
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