1 supreme liter.
Not sure if this is the right sub.
It's a great place to do business!
Me: Dad can you turn the kettle on?
Dad: Sure thing!
(walks to kettle, bends down and whispers)
Dad: Oh Kettle you're so hot...
Dad: Hey, why did the elephant paint his balls red?
Me: Umm.. I don't know, why?
Dad: To hide in a cherry tree!
Me: ...
Dad: Okay.. how did Tarzan get killed?
Me: sigh I don't know Dad, how?
Dad: Picking cherries!
Facepalms all around by everyone in earshot, and Dad would know that he had done well.
Don't wanna be Obama self. I'm just China to make you happy. Yes, my pun Israel. Norway I'm lying, Syria stuff. You guys Ghana have to Czech these puns. Okay, I think I will Finnish now. I think Alaska guy to help me out because I’m Havana hard time. You have no India how long it took me to make these puns, but I hope they'll help Sweden your day because I Canada think of one anymore. Oman, I think Iran out of ideas Irish I can think of Samoa. I think my Bahrain can’t think of one anymore but Taiwan this to continue. I want Tibet that there are better things to do now. I Belize it’s time to put an end to these puns because I’m Oslo getting Bordeaux this. African hate these puns I want Togo because I Amsterdam tired. I’m Sudan with puns now.
In conversation with friends she said.
"My grandpa died of lung cancer and he didn't smoke a day in his life."
"Of course not, he smoked cigarettes."
Eye roll "no, he worked in the mines."
"That's why they don't sell cigarettes to miners."
Groan "you see what I have to put up with."
It is a grate film
While fishing with a friend, his dad and his grandpa, we weren't having any luck.
Friend: "I just need one stupid fish to bite this bait."
Friend's Grandpa: "You need one that didn't go to school"
Friend's dad: "But they are all in schools!!"
Grandpa: "How'd you sleep?"
Dad: "With my eyes closed."
Grandpa: "How do you feel?"
Dad: "With my hands."
Me: facepalm.jpg
Edited for formatting
At dinner, my mom was telling us a story of one of her kids (she works as a teacher) and how she accidentally sewed some string into her pants. This followed:
Me: Wow, that's sew funny!
Dad: Needle-less to say, I hope she was alright
Me: You have a point there
I don't believe anything else was said after that
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he won't come anyways!
