Got a job at a potato chip factory. On top of salary they said I could pick any flavor chip off the shelf once a month.
They prided themselves in their stock options.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but due to the ongoing pandemic, would it be smart to stay at least 6ft away from the chips and dip when visiting a Mexican restaurant?
You know, Salsa Distancing.
A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a salmon under his arm...
Man: Do you do fishcakes?
Fishmonger: no, I'm afraid not, sorry.
Man: Ah, that's a shame - it's his birthday today
What do you call a monk that loves chips?
Get it? Cuz Pringles are chips?
I visited a monastery the other day and as I walked past the kitchen I saw a man frying chips. I asked him "Are you the friar?"
He replied "No, I'm the chip monk..."
What sound does a tortilla chip make when sneezing?
A monastery in Las Vegas kept getting chips in their donation box
It got so frustrating they decided to hire a chipmunk
I heard the government was putting chips inside of people.
Well mine better be sour cream and onion
What did the corn chips say to the thief?
I need a pun about chips for a Christmas gift
So my brother is super hard to buy for because my mom buys him EVERYTHING, literally. This kid has every toy, game console, video game, movie, funko pop, t-shirt, etc to ever exist.
My sister and I decided to buy him chips for Christmas. I got jalapeno cheddar cheetos, a few snack bags of spicy chips, and a can of pringles. I'm going to wrap them individually and put them in a stocking.
I would like to add a card with a pun or joke about chips to at least make this (admittedly low effort) gift funny.
I was hungry so I ate all my chips.
Everyone else at the poker game was not impressed.
I got my chips before I put my money into the vending machine
I guess it's out of order.
I visited a monastery and as I walked past the kitchen I saw a man frying chips...
'Are you the friar? ' I asked him.
'No, I am the chip monk' he replied.
Edit : Holy crap ! More than 1K updoots for a silly joke ? Thanks guys ! I am not sure whether to be proud or ashamed of myself.
What do you call chips that you can catch?
I just baked some fresh chocolate chip cookies
What's a dog's favorite kind of potato chip?
There was a fight in the fish and chip shop
What brand of chips is slower than Internet Explorer?
Last night my wife says "Honey will you go get us some tortilla chips and cheese?"
I looked deep into her eyes and said
"I'm nacho delivery service. "
The other day I was on the dock talking to two of my neighbors… One of them had a cooler full of beers and snacks… Pulling out a beer pops the top and opening a bag of chips, he says “My wife’s an angel
I said, “you’re lucky – mine is still alive…”
Of course, french fries are far too posh for us, we only do chips!
Did you hear about the fight at the fish and chip shop?
Five fish got battered and a bunch of chips were a-salted.
My grandson’s dad joke ( very proud grandfather) What kind of chips do you get at the airport?
What do ducks love with their tortilla chips?
I hear the givernment is putting chips in people.
Every morning when I am done getting my 2 year old ready for school I call her a Canadian potato chip.
Because she’s all dressed.
In Vegas, people can tithe by dropping casino chips in the offertory.
At the end of the weekend there is a Brother that goes around to all the casinos to cash them out and make a deposit.
He’s the Chip Monk.
I thought I dipped my tortilla chip into a bowl of cheese sauce, but it turned out to be honey mustard.
It was a queso mistaken identity.
I told my wife “Honey, there’s a chip in our new bowls!” She was not as impressed.
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I love working at the chip factory...
But my boss really Lays in on me, and it Ruffles my feathers
Mashed up dates, chocolate chips, peanut butter, granola, almonds....delicious homemade granola bars
My husband and I were eating chips when our toddler requested one. So he gave her a chip and she walked away.
A few minutes later she came back and my husband wasn’t paying attention so I said “give her another, dad.” And he responded with “what’s wrong with the dad she’s got?”
A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a cod under his arm...
He says to the bloke behind the counter,
“Do you do fishcakes?”
The man behind the counter nods his head and smiles.
“Yeah mate.”
Customer points to the cod under his arm.
“Better make him one then mate, it’s his birthday.”
What did the potato chip bag say to the battery?
I’m Frito Lay if you’re Eveready.
I once ate a hundred chips in one sitting
That’s how I got banned from the casino
I was heating up chip dip when I spilled some on my feet.
I guess you could say i had toasty-toes.
What does Pac-Man eat with his chips?
A drunk man eating chips wanders into a monastery
While wandering around he bumps into a old man in robes cooking.
With a grin the drunk man asks “Are you the fish friar?”
“No brother” he replied “I’m the chip monk”
A man walks into a bar and orders helicopter flavor chips.
The barman replies “sorry mate we only do plain”
I have a farmer friend who heats his milk products to 212 degrees Fahrenheit using cow chips...
Yep. It's called pasture-ized milk.
What do you call a monkey that loves chips?
A hungry traveller stopped at a monastery and was taken to the kitchen where there was a brother frying chips.
"Are you the friar?" he asked.
The brother replied, "No, I'm the chip monk".
Did you hear that there was a big fight down at the fish and chips shop
The fish got battered and the chips got assaulted
Did you hear about the fight outside the chip shop the other day?
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